2020's fashion was really terrible

Probably because nobody had any taste

Why do fashion designers never have any good ideas?

They're too clothes minded.

Why are LGBT people so fashionable?

Because they spent a lot of time in the closet

Click here for a good old fashioned vampire joke.

Ha ha ha. You sucker.

Just learned that French fashion designers are trying to develop a clothing line made from frozen water.

I SWEAR!!

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Carl is in the 10th year of a life sentence when he gets a new cellmate, Jim. After taking some time to size Jim up and decide that he can trust him, Carl tells Jim about his plan to escape. "You see" Carl says "for the first 5 years I was inside, I trained my digestive system to follow my command.

Now I can eat something and it comes out broken down into its components." Jim is skeptical, but intrigued.

Carl continues: "For the *last* five years, I've been swallowing pieces off my uniform. It's perfect, because the guards just think it's rats chewing on it."

So Jim asks, "Well, ...

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Gay people have no excuse to have a bad fashion sense

Like homie what were you doing in the closet that whole time

I’ve always had an interest in combining fashion and art.

Too bad FART isn’t a major.

I just got banned from /r/fashion

Apparently they didn't like my threads

Student: Can I borrow a pencil?

**Teacher:** I don't know, can you borrow a pencil?

**Student:** Aha, but I clearly meant to ask for permission. Since you and the rest of the class understood my intent perfectly well, and the word "may" to show permission is rapidly falling out of fashion, there is nothing wrong with asking...

My ex broke up with me because she said I was too old fashioned

I thought we had good alchemy

It seems my lady doctor has a crush on me and she really likes my fashion sense.

She told me that I have serious healthy shoes.

A Russian, an American, and an Englishman catch a goldfish while fishing on a boat

The goldfish pleads to them: “C’mon guys, I have a family down there, don’t eat me! Here’s what I’ll do for you, wherever you want to go, just say the place and jump off of the boat into the water, the very next moment you’ll be there.”

The Russian comes forward and says: “I’ve missed my dear...

What’s the cheapest fashion?

Freestyle.

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How many reddit users does it take to replace a lightbulb?

1 to make a post about it,
4 to mention that its the wrong forum,
1 to post it to the right forum,
7 to suggest op should post it to the electronics forum,
2 to post it to the electronics forum,
1 mod to delete the second post,

3 to suggest an image post would have gathered mor...

A blonde was checked into the hospital when a fire broke out.

A blonde was checked into the hospital when a fire broke out. The entire hospital was being evacuated. As the fire spread, a fireman was checking for stragglers when he found the blonde choking on smoke while pulling on a nurse's assistant's gown. The fireman grabbed the blonde and took her outside ...

Did you see the latest fashion trend is adhesive based dresses and suits?

From what I heard they’re a bit tacky.

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A man is staying at an old fashioned pub/inn

Downstairs in the tavern he is drinking before retiring to his room. The innkeep approaches him and proposes a challenge. He has a magical chicken that will grant him one wish if he can beat her in a trivia contest. The man is bemused but accepts the challenge, figuring there’s no harm in indulging ...

An Old Friend........

A farmer was at a diner one day having lunch, when he noticed an old friend of his who was also dining there.

What really caught the farmer’s attention, was that his friend was wearing an earring.

The farmer knew that his old friend was a fairly conservative fellow, so he was really cu...

I went to a fashion show the other day.

But they were just a bunch if posers.

What do you call a Thai dish that comes in and out of fashion?

Fad Thai

My parents are old fashioned. When I was a boy they wanted me to play baseball.

And When I was a girl they wanted me to see a psychiatrist

What did the trendy terrorist wear to the fashion exhibition?

A bomber jacket

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A new farmer from the city

He's given up on city life and dropped everything and bough 20 acres in the country.

The problem is he doesn't know anything about farming. So he goes to the feed store to ask some friendly farmers for some help in the right direction.

Luckily an old farmer there is happy to see youn...

I once met someone who refused to talk to people unless the conversation was about fashion.

He was very clothes minded.

I had no complaints....

I had no complaints when i became interested in Buddhism and became a Budist

a few more when i became invested in affirmative action and became an activist

but as soon as i got into fashion....

Why did the hoody smell like weed?

It was high fashion.

Heard this one long ago- A guy went for a jog.

After a while, he sat down on a bench, thoroughly exhausted. He noticed someone sat down beside him. While wiping his sweat, he saw a strangely garbed young girl with boyish hair cut.

'God! The fashion of young folks these days. You can't even tell if it's a boy or a girl' said he.

'He...

People keep talking about these "safe spaces". Well, call me old fashioned but I'm going to keep on calling them what they REALLY are...

Banks

What do you call a socialist who's into fashion?

Commie Hilfiger.

I think Hong Kong is the next big player in the fashion world.

Mask were very in during the protests last year. Now everyone's wearing one.

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One day, King Arthur had to leave Camelot to go for a diplomatic hunt. Worried about his wife's potential infidelity, he asks Merlin to fashion her a chastity belt...

Merlin assures the king that anything that is put through the hole in the chastity belt will be immediately cut off with magic.

Satisfied, King Arthur goes on his hunt. When he returns several days later, he immediately goes to the Knights of the Round Table and asks all of them to drop thei...

Call me old fashioned but my favorite HTML attributes are still colspan and rowspan

I just love me some big TD’s!

Why do the clothes in Beauty and the Beast look so old-fashioned?

Tailors old as time…

I never order shrimp-fried rice.

Call me old fashioned, but I like my food to be prepared by a human.

An old lady walks into a brothel

An old lady walks into a brothel looking to pay for some old fashioned good times. The clerk at the desk says they offer three rooms for service.
The first room is just a cement floor for 25$
The second room has a normal bed for 50$
The third room has a waterbed for 100$
After thin...

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What's the difference between a fashion statement and being horny in WWI?

One's a French Tuck and the other's a...

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A man went to the doctor to inquire about options for penis enlargement...

"Doc," he said, "you've got to help me. My penis is miniscule. It always has been. The other boys used to make fun of me in the locker room, girls I dated would laugh at me as soon as we got to the bedroom... I experienced nothing but humiliation my whole life, until I met my wife, god bless her. Sh...

I'm going to write a TV show about a detective living in Hawaii who uses mathematics to solve crimes in a circular fashion

that's right, Magnum Pi.

My lawyer has such a good sense of fashion, he wins every court case

He really puts on the best lawsuits.

Are camo-pattern clothes still in fashion?

I don't see them anywhere these days.

News: A Major Fashion Label Releases a Cream for Yeast Infections

It's called "Gucci Coochie Goo".

What fashionable shoes do ninjas wear to the anesthesiologist?

Numb Chucks.

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I'm trying to create a good ol fashion porn shop for us necrophiliacs. I know just what to call it

Welcome to the Creamatorium

3 generations of males went to an old-fashioned store...

The young man asked for a pound of raisins from the pretty lady behind the counter. She had to climb a ladder to fill the order, revealing her naked flesh under her short skirt. Then, she asked his dad what he wanted.

Wanting to see a panty-less beauty climb the stairs again, he too asked f...

What did they call the guy who sold several fashionable hat companies for an incredibly large sum of money?

A multi-milliner.

Did you hear about the super model with IBS that committed a fashion faux pas?

Got runs in her stockings.

Never talk to me about fashion

It just goes in one year and out the other

A panda walks into a bar...

A panda walks into a bar. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and fires two shots in the air.

"Why? Why are you behaving in this strange, un-panda-like fashion?" asks the confused waiter, as the panda walks towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual an...

A Priest dies & is waiting in line at Heaven's Gate.



Ahead of him is a guy, fashionably dressed, in dark sun glasses, a loud shirt, leather jacket & jeans.

God to the guy : '' Who Are You....???? ''



Guy : '' I am a Bus driver''



God : Take this Gold robe & enter kingdom of heaven.



God ...

Walking through the grocery store

I’m approaching the checkout and there are two kids with their mom. The kids are fighting and the mom is asking for the manager. I try and ease the tension, and tell her what wonderful twins you have. In Karen fashion she freaks out on me and said can’t you tell one is 8 and the other is 14. I respo...

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Girl and her dad are driving around, when an aisle of women leaving a fashion show suddenly walk onto the road, nearly being hit by them.

Girl says: "That was pretty fucking clothes."

Two friends met at the neighborhood supermarket.

When they got to the checkout one of the ladies started rummaging through her purse for her wallet, she took out a few things, including a TV remote.

“Do you always take the remote with you when you go shopping?” The other woman laughed.

“No,” the woman answered “But I asked my husband...

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There is a smiling security guard in the bathroom at the strip club i go to... [Long]

Night or day doesnt matter, you go in and he just stares you down while you’re using the pisser with the biggest smile on his face.

Ive tried talking to him several times but he just stands there and smiles like the queens guard or some shit. I figured i would test him a bit and see what i c...

A man with no arms applies to be the local church bell squire.

The pastor looks him over and says - Well, we didn't get alot of interest in the posting, so the job is yours, but I'm not sure how you plan on pulling the rope to the bell?
The man climbs up to the church steeple and runs at the bell as fast as he can. BOOOONG! He hits it with his face and it so...

What do fashionable ducks use to make s'mores?

Glam Quackers

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Unfortunate

This guy lives in Westchester, NY and goes to school at Ithaca College. For two years, he has wanted to ask a certain girl (who is also from Westchester and also goes to Ithaca) out on a date, but has never had the courage.

Finally, one day over the summer, he sees her at home and musters up...

Where do fashionable ghosts shop?

Bootiques.

What do you call Jesus at a fashion show?

A Cross Dresser.

A man and his dog were walking along a road

A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them..

After a while, they came to...

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Fat fashion designer has found a time machine [OC]

Thinking about how many opportunities of discovery await him, he went inside and clicked a button.

He soon found himself in ancient rome. He noticed all the plebs wearing cool ancient clothes so he quickly went to the nearest shopping centre.

Being fat himself, he asked the shopkeepe...

A PETA member was going to drive himself to a fashion show, but he changed his mind...

...when he found out they would show fur.

What do you call a fashionable subway system

Metro

Why are prosthetic limbs so in fashion?

Anyone can pull them off

[NSFW] How did the fashion designer kill himself?

The Hemming Way

In my old fashioned office the multifunction printer broke down.

No fax was given that day...

If “ire” is an old fashioned synonym for anger,

Is Ireland the land of angry people?

I spent Valentine's Day the old fashioned way

Running around in a diaper shooting arrows at people

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A young girl was about to get married.

The young bride's mother had some old-fashioned ideas of marriage, and passed them on to her daughter.

"Never let your husband see you in the nude," she advised. "You should always wear something."

"Yes, mother," replied the obedient girl.

Two weeks after the wedding, the girl a...

A homeless man walks in to a fashion show.

At that time we were introduced to the fashion style the "Torn Jeans".

What do you call a dog's fashion sense?

Doggy style.

My friend is old fashioned. Before proposing to his girlfriend, he asked her father.

But he was already married.

Did you hear about the fashion designer who was on the phone while driving and nearly got into an accident?

It was a clothes call.

A young man goes into a confessional booth and confesses to the priest that he used the Lord's name in vain.

"Tell me what happened my child, so we may begin the path of forgiveness." Said the priest behind the curtain.

"I was golfing," began the man. "And my first shot went deep into the rough."

"Ah, and that is where you misused the Lord's name is it?" Replied the priest.

"No father,...

Have you heard about the new trend? People are putting baked goods on their ear studs

Its pie-on-earring fashion

A librarian is working away at her desk when she notices that a chicken has come into the library and is patiently waiting in front of the desk.

A librarian is working away at her desk when she notices that a chicken has come into the library and is patiently waiting in front of the desk. When the chicken sees that it has the librarian's attention, it squawks, "Book, book, book, BOOK!"

The librarian complies, putting a couple of books...

I've invented a new game. You use small breath mints as playing pieces in the old-fashioned match-3-in-a-row game. I'd be happy to teach you my strategy for winning this game, but I'll have to charge you a small fee:

Call it a Tic Tac Tic-Tac-Toe Tactics Tax.

There's a town in Russia where the aristocracy are fashionably polyamorous.

Share-noble.

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What do you call six men having anal sex with a woman in the back of an old fashioned car?

Shitty Shitty Gang Bang!

Two older male dolphins notice their hairlines are starting to recede.

Dolphins go bald, too. Tough for humans to notice, but dolphins notice... Anyway...

Understandably, they start getting a little down in the dumps recognizing the loss of their youth and feeling a profound sense of their own mortality.

In a moment of clarity, one dolphin says to his bud...

I told my wife I wanted her to wear an old- fashioned Halloween costume this year

She filled herself up with whiskey, bitters, and sugar, and topped herself off with an orange slice and cherry.

I ended up going as the "stiff" part of our couples' costume.

I'm thinking of starting a fashion line for alcoholics.. I guess I'll just call it..

Michael Coors Light

I was trying to find out where my local pelt-merchant was hosting a “Lupine Designs” fashion gala for his fellow lycanthropes this year

So I asked “Where is the werewolf’s wolf-wares warehouse where werewolves wear wolves’ wares?”

I was at a lingerie store and they were advertising an old fashioned-looking nighty with the tag line "Just like mother used to wear"...

It's called a Freudian Slip.

I have a joke about a pirate lady who got hit in the chest by a cannonball and needed some good old-fashioned pirate surgery

But it would be funnier with a punchline, wooden tit?

If you arrive fashionably late wearing crocs

You’re just late

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Bob, an accountant





was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge after spending a great day on the ocean fishing.


His catch, cleaned and filleted, was wrapped in newspaper on the passenger-side floor.


He was late getting home and was speeding... Wouldn't you know that a...

At my friend's house, her dad told us these jokes called "Mama mama jokes." I expected old fashioned "Yo' mama" jokes. I got these.

Mama, Mama, I don't like little brother!

Shut up and eat what you're told.

Mama, Mama, I don't want to go to Hawaii!

Shut up and keep swimming.

Mama, Mama, I don't like going in circles!

Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!

Honestly, I'm scarre...

I did a few fashion shoots with Marillion in the ‘80s.

It was very easy work... like shooting Fish in apparel.

I’ll never join one of those online dating services because I prefer to meet someone the good old-fashioned way...

Through alcohol and poor judgement...

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A man calls his boss one morning, and says..

“Hey boss, i’m sorry but I don’t think i’ll be able to make it today. I’m feeling really under the weather.”

His boss, a pretty old fashioned man, replies:

“Listen here, mister. Whenever I feel under the weather, I go see my wife, and tell her to polish my knob, grease my engines and d...

Did you hear about the new fashion trend of sticky clothing?

Its popular, but its really hard to pull off.

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The Lion, the Witch and a fabulous fashion sense

What did the Lion say to the Witch when she caught him coming out of the wardrobe?

"My sexual preference is Narnia business."

I know skinny jeans are fashionable...

But as a slightly chubby man, I just can't seem to be able to pull them off

Why can't fashion designers play uno?

Because they always draw a cardigan.

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A plane is flying over the Amazon when it crashes...

...three men survive the plane crash (German, French, American).

They crash near a village and get captured by the tribe. The villagers tell the three men that: "We aren't cannibals, and we're normally peaceful and wouldn't kill you, but our canoes are riddled with holes, and we need your sk...

I'm old fashioned when it comes to coffee. If someone offers me a hot cup of java, I say no thanks.

I'd much prefer a cup of C++.

We gave our children old-fashioned names...

Our little boy is Hunter and our little girl is Gatherer. - Brian Kiley

What do you call a fashion designer that rejects everything?

Calvin Deklein.

What do you call a group of ducks quacking at once in a disorderly fashion?

Quack-aphony

There was a fire in a yodelling school.

Everyone was to exit in an orderly orderly orderly fashion.

The Heavy Weight World Champion belt will no longer be fashioned to look like a large watch.

They realized it was just a huge waist of time.

Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson

The teacher asks the class, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?”

Little Mary says, “The science teacher is very intelligent.”

The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word fashionable in a sentence?”

Little Suzie says, “The ladies are very fashionable.”

Th...

AIRPLANE FASHION

A woman wearing a strapless gown and sporting a necklace with an airplane on it spotted a young man staring at her.
She asked him, "Were you admiring my airplane?"
He replied, "No, I was admiring the landing field."

An old-fashioned joke

A young lady comes home after work and her daddy says: "I have two good news for you!"

\- Oh really? Tell me the news!

\- The guy that you were dating for the last 8 months came this morning, said that bought a big house to start a family and asked me for your hand. I gave him my bless...

I once spent ten years marooned on a tropical shore...

I lived on nothing but coconuts and seafood. I fashioned sandals out of leaves, a hut out of grass and sticks, and I kept myself healthy with wild plants. One day I was scouring the beach for copper wire to build the radio I was working on, and I came across a small white spheroid about 2" in diamet...

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It was weeks leading up to my prom, I didn’t have a date yet...

So I asked this girl in my class to go with me, and I knew I had to pull out all the stops.

I wanted to buy her flowers and chocolates when I asked her, so I went to the florist but when I got there there was a 15 minute line that I had to wait. I thought ‘Thats fine, it’s prom season’. I wai...

Recent fashion trends...

certainly have given women the cold shoulder, haven't they?

Colleague said "I used to be the most fashionable chick in my batch in college!"

To which "What changed after college?" Is not the apt reply.

Where do fashionable kids with cancer like to shop for clothes?

Never 21

My girlfriend said that I was too old-fashioned.

So I beheaded her.

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What if Prom is just an elaborate business scams that fashion companies carry out every year to sell all the shitty, cheap dresses to high school kids because the rich people wouldn't buy them?

*scam

I is stupid.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is sitting alone at home, when suddenly there’s a knock at his door ...

Standing at the door is a door to door salesman.

Man: Whatever you’re selling, I’m not interested.

Salesman: But what I’m selling is very interesting. I’m a purveyor of luxury prosthetics. Allow me to demonstrate.

And he raises the right leg of his pants. His leg is solid gold!...

A young city biker walks into a seedy tavern in Sturgis

A young city biker walks into a seedy tavern in Sturgis, SD. Sturgis! He finally made it. He had several items on his must-do list, and this tavern was one of them. The chili, he'd been told, was world famous.

As he sits down at the bar, he notices a grizzled old biker with his arms folded, s...

A man walked into a bar and orders a drink...

“What’ll you have?” asks the bartender

Man - Anything but a Bud Light
So the bartender pours him a Jack and Coke

After a while the man again requests a drink.

Bartender - what will it be this time?
Man - Anything but a Bud Light
After then finishing his Old Fashioned, t...

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