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Extra Time Jokes

My friend Lee likes to allow extra time for his schedule.

That's just the LeeWay

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A business man is driving through a small town, on his way to an important presentation, when he realizes he's in need of a haircut and doesn't have much extra time...

He remembers there's a little barbershop on the corner so he stops, and a short while later he's back on his way.




A week or two passes, and he pulls into the little barbershop again.





"Hello again Sir." the barber says. "What can I do for you?"


<...

The Boston Symphony was performing Beethoven’s Ninth...

In the piece, there’s about a 20 min long passage during which the double basses have nothing to do. Rather than sit around the whole time looking stupid, some bassists decided to sneak offstage and go to the tavern next door for a quick drink. After slamming several beers in quick succession (as do...

To all the people who type "u" instead of "you" ...

What exactly do you do with all the extra time you saved?

Scientists have determined that if you drink more water, you will live longer...

But the extra time is spent peeing.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

my school life sucks.

my teachers are awful and give too much homework, they’re also so mean to anyone who tries to ask a question, and are always taking extra time just to pick on me, just being total jerks.

my classmates are equally bad, being big bullies to anyone they see, always stealing my work, tapping thei...

A woman sees an ad for labioplasty in the paper...

... So she she decides to get the operation, so her husband can enjoy the tightness of her youth.

After the operation, she wakes up with three roses on her chest.

Curious, she asks the nurse, "who are the roses from?"

"Well," says the nurse, "The first rose is from your hu...

Four students decide to skip an exam

Four students were attending law college and were quite used to cheating and exploiting to get better grades. Their final exam was due tomorrow and they wanted to get some extra time to hopefully enhance their grades.

The plan was simple: don’t show up tomorrow, spend the whole day learning ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Going down before the dentist.

A Man has a dentist appointment in the morning before work, So he knows that he has some extra time to get ready in the morning. When he wakes up and throws the covers back, he realized his wife is sleeping naked next to him. He decides, since he has some extra time, to wake her up with a pleasant s...

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