I was telling 'dumb blonde' jokes in a bar.

Suddenly a muscular blonde-haired man ran right at me with a sharp razor and screamed "I've had just about enough of you!" Luckily for me, I was left completely unharmed, as he couldn't find a place to plug it in.

YO MAMA SO DUMB...

She majored in drama because she thought it would help with the ACT

My parents like making dumb jokes

That's why I was born

A dumb blonde, a smart blonde, and an antivaxx adult find a $100 bill on the ground, who picks it up?

The dumb blonde, because the other two don't exist.

Why are Americans so dumb?

Because they shoot the ones who go to school.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If I call myself dumb, it makes it way more impressive when I do something smart. But if I call myself smart and then go and be dumb, I just look way more dumb.

Wow, I’m so smart for thinking of that!
Fuck—no wait—

I never said he was dumb...

I simply said that Roe v. Wade are not two methods of crossing the Potomac.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a really dumb zipper?

A zipshit.

Yo Momma is so dumb

She put the newspaper in the TV and called it Paper View.

A young boy enters a barber shop...

...and the barber whispers to his customer. ‘This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it you.’ The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, ‘Which do you want, son?’ The boy takes the quarters and leaves. ‘What did I tell...

Schrodinger’s cat was meant to prove how dumb quantum states are, yet it’s widely used to advocate and explain it. I bet he’s rolling in his grave...

and not

If I am so dumb then...

How come I can complete a jigsaw puzzle in 6 weeks when the box says 3-6 years.

My roommate is so dumb

the closest he ever got to a 4.0 was on a breathalyzer test.

Can we ban yo mama jokes from this sub? They’re old, dumb, and have been done by everyone a hundred times.

Just like yo mama.

My ex-girlfriend was so dumb

She thought manual labor was a Mexican migrant worker.

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You know how they say blondes are dumb?

A blonde walks into an ice cream shop

She's greeted by the cashier who says welcome to my ice cream shop we have almost every flavor you can think of but unfortunately we are out of all chocolate items including ice cream and toppings so what are you having today miss?

She replies can ...

My teacher said our class was do dumb not even 80% of us would pass the test

She’s the dumb one, we don’t even have that much people in our class!

A dumb guy calls to yell at the pizza man at his local shop.

“I got this pizza delivered and I specifically asked to have the pie cut into six slices. This pie is cut in eight slices!”

​

“What’s the big deal?” the pizza man wondered.

​

“There is no way I’ll be able to eat all these!” the man yelled.

&am...

Your momma's so dumb...

She thought a quarterback was a refund

Dumb fisherman.

Two buddies are fishing,   but they haven't caught anything all day.   Then,   another fisherman walks by with a huge load of fish.   They ask him   "excuse me,   but where did you get all those fish?"

The other fisherman replies,   "If you just go down the steam until the water isn't salty, ...

If i had a dollar for every time Donald Trump said something dumb,

I probably wouldn’t pay my taxes either.

When you're trying to slingshot around Jupiter but you run out of fuel and end up on a collision course with one of Jupiter's moons...

Europa creek with no paddle.

I hope someone smiles at this dumb space joke.

Your mom is so dumb

Your mom is so dumb that she climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side

A blonde tries to prove that blondes aren't dumb at a blonde convention

So she goes on stage and a guy asks her math question while the crowd watches, the first question he asks is "What is 5 * 20?", she answers "80?", so the crowd starts to chant, "One more try! One more try!". So the guy asks another question, "What is 18 + 7", to which she replies, "30", and the crow...

A man walks into a bar for illiterate people. The bartender says, "Don't you hate it when people tell jokes that have specific details about situations that would never happen in real life, just so they can make some dumb pun?" The man, nodding, replies,

"I no write."

Why did God make women pretty and dumb?

He made them pretty so men would be attracted to them and He made them dumb so they would be attracted to men.

A teacher tells a class that nobody is dumb.

She then says to the class, "Stand up if you think you are dumb."

Everyone remains seated.

"Anyone?"

Finally, One student in the back of the class decides to stand up.

"Johnny! Do you really think you're dumb?"

"No, teacher." He replies, "But I hate to see you st...

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An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all to give speeches to the Deaf and Dumb Society.

All are intent on making an impression on their audience. The Englishman goes first, and to the surprise of his colleagues, starts by rubbing first his chest, and then his groin. When he finishes, the Scotsman and Irishman ask him what he was doing.

“Well,” he explained, “by rubbing my chest ...

Your mom so dumb...

She threw a rock at the ground and missed

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Dumb Fucks

"Look at that dumb fuck, Daddy," said my 3-year-old from his car seat.

"Where?" I asked. There were quite a few around us, he could have been talking about any of them.

"The white one," he continued.

That narrowed it down. There was only one that fit that description.

"Th...

Worst Pirate Joke in the Entire World

​

**Where do Pirates go to drink?**

​

​

At the Baaaarrrrrrrr

​

​

**Wait I'm not done**. **Where do Pirates put their stuff?**

​

​

In a Jaaaaarrrrrrr
<...

My brother was always the smart one that everyone loved. I was the dumb kid. While I sold drugs down by the beach, he became a doctor in applied maths.

But even so, he's still my brother. I'll never stop lending him money when he needs it.

9/10 people are Dumb

It’s great to be the 1%

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Yo mamma so dumb

I told her i wanted to do it doggystyle so she sat on the carpet and started licking her own pussy

A dumb man and a smart man are having a contest...

If the smart man asks the dumb man a question and the dumb man answers wrong, then the dumb man owes the smart man $1. However, if the dumb man asks the smart man a question and the smart man answers wrong, then the smart man must give $100 to the dumb man.

Smart man: What has 4 legs and goes...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There was a debate in my class about the Mexican/US border

Some argued that a wall was needed, and a rather racist friend of mine jokingly said:
"Mexicans are rather dumb, some barbed wire and such would be more than enough to keep those thieves out." After a short pause, he added: "As long as they don't start to steal the border itself".

Unsurpr...

Smart vs dumb

Smart one (S) has a proposition for a dumb one (D):
S: We'll be solving riddles, and since you're dumb, you will pay me a quarter for each you don't solve. Aand since I'm the smart one, I will pay you 10 dollars for each unsolved.
D: Good.
S: Here we go, it's little, green and jumps a lot, ...

If you don't know the difference between there, their, and they're...

your dumb

A blonde girl is tired of people making dumb blonde jokes...

So she decides to gather a stadium full of blondes to prove that not all blondes are dumb. She picks one woman from the crowd and asks her,

"What is the square root of 144?"

The woman thinks long and hard and answers, "Uhmmm, 7?"

The stadium starts chanting, "one more try!...

People on reddit are dumb

They always say "whoosh" whenever I correct others mistakes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

3 Newfie’s are talking about how dumb their wives are

Three Newfies are sitting around talking about how dumb their wives are.
First one:
“Boy, my wife she’s right dumb, she went and bought a brand new dishwasher.”
“Cost $2000”
“We ain’t even got indoor plumbing!”

“Awe jeez b’y, you think that’s dumb?”
“Oh me nerves, my wife’s so ...

Yo Mamma's so dumb...

...she works at 2 strip clubs and told me she was bipolar.

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A man calls to the hotel's receptionist and he says........"Hello..........

..."Hello, I'm in room 620, please send someone here immediately! I'm having an argument with my wife and she's saying that she's going to jump out of the window!!"




The receptionist says, "I'm sorry sir, but that's your personal problem"




To which the man gets an...

People say Cows are Dumb

But I’ve never seen one that wasn’t out standing in its field.

Trump may look dumb

But I can guarantee you he isn't as smart as he looks.

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