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Drinking Water Jokes

I stopped drinking water while studying chemistry

My notes say adding water decreases concentration

Dark humor is like clean drinking water.....

.... not everybody gets it.

Have you ever stopped and realized drinking water through a straw is . . .

the opposite of snorkeling.

9 out of 10 doctors recommend drinking water over soda

Not Dr. Pepper.

I always have a problem with drinking water

I just don't get the solution

those damn vegans still drinking water?!?!

That's a fish's house, you nasty savages!!

My friend in Africa was complaining about the lack of drinking water in his village.

So I sent him a Get Well Soon card.

How did the idiot drown drinking water?

The toilet seat fell on his head.

(My boyfriend's brother came up with that one when he was a little tot)

Scottish man walking through a field, sees a man drinking water from a pool with his hand.

The Scottish man shouts ' Awa ye feel hoor thats full O coos Sharn ' (Don't drink the water ya fool, it's full of cow s ** t.)

The man shouts back 'I'm English, Speak English, I don't understand you'.

The Scottish man shouts back 'Use both hands, you'll get more in.'

The thirsty criminal

My grandpa told me this gem of a joke. Here it goes...

A fleeing criminal, desperate to escape the police, runs into the desert with hardly any water. Very soon, he runs out of drinking water, and hours later, he is already plodding under the merciless desert sun.

He is close to desper...

A doctor was addressing a large audience in Oxford "The materials we put into our stomach should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.

. Red meat is full of steroids and dye. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High transfat diets can be disastrous and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water. But... There is one thing that is the more dangerous to all us...

Beer convention

There's a beer convention in town, and all the CEOs from all the beer companes are there. During a break between seminars, a few of them went down to the hotel bar for a drink.

The Anheuser Busch CEO says to the bartender, "I'll have a Budweiser, the King of Beers," and he takes his drink and...

England is finally honoring it's longest river entirely in it's border by making repairs to the over 45 navigation locks used for transportation, improving the many drinking water systems abstracting flow from it's discharge into the sea, and providing for wildlife sanctuaries near the coast.

The people will vote on the entire referendum poised to fund the project.

It's called the Bond...the Thames Bond....

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