Enterprise maintenance log, stardate 2259.55: Today, the main sewage system got jammed by the captain's log again.

Medical promised to recommend a change to his diet.

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Why are sewage treatment workers always so tough?

They have to deal with all the world’s shit.

A passerby walks past a sewer manhole and sees an old man inside, waist deep, going through the sewage...

He asks... “ What are you doing down there??.?”

Old man replies:” Looking for my denture... I accidentally dropped it into the toilet and flushed it down the drain....”

Passer: “Surely you don’t expect to find it?!”

Old man:” Of course I do, already found three, but none of them...

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Workers at the sewage treatment plant went on a strike.

It was a really shitty situation.

How do you call the money earned by a sewage company?

Gross Profit.

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For the guy who drowned in the sewage

rest in piss.

The human body was probably designed by a civil engineer

Who the hell builds a toxic sewage pipeline through a recreational area ?

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A hillbilly is taking a dump in the outhouse when a dollar bill falls out his pocket and down into the hole.

A hillbilly is taking a dump in the outhouse when a dollar bill falls out his pocket and down into the hole full of sewage.

He starts cursing and storms out of the outhouse.

His buddy looks at him and asks “what’s wrong? What happened??”

“Well I was in there taking a dump and ...

Why do they bother saying “raw sewage”?

Do some people actually cook that stuff?

I've quit my job at the sewage farm.

Well, I was just going through the motions.

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This goes out to all the sewage treatment plant workers working during quarantine.

Thank you guys, you deal with a lot more shit then us!

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I’ll always remember my time at the sewage plant.

Man, did we see some shit!

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What did the sewage worker say when he was working on new years?

I’m tired of last year’s shit

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My wife has just got a job at the local sewage works.

I reckon she will be the best shit stirrer they have ever had.

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How do you make clean water out of raw sewage?

You boil the shit out of it

Mud treatment is good for the skin....

...but I saw a sign the other day saying "Sewage Treatment Works". Trust me, it doesn't.

What did the Sewage Worker say to his apprentice?

Urine for a surprise.
^^^^^sorry

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Paul often visits his boyfriend Richard the sewage worker at his job

He loves seeing his Dick in a manhole

Did you hear about the flock of crows that were sprayed with sewage?

It was a murder most foul.

A sewage worker has just started his first day on the job

He and his supervisor are standing over a manhole and the new guy begins to climb down.

Suddenly he looks up with a look of mild panic in his eyes and says,

"Wait, what happens if I fall in?"

His supervisor looks down and him and replies,

"Son, if you fall, urine over you...

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What do lil' Wayne and sewage have in common?

Shit flow.

In a prison, two inmates are comparing notes (old Soviet joke)

"What did they arrest you for?" asks the first. "Was it a political or common crime?"

"Of course it was political. I'm a plumber. They summoned me to the district Party committee to fix the sewage pipes. I looked and said, 'Hey, the entire system needs to be replaced.' So they gave me seven ...

The villagers mourned the king and his jester after an unfortunate sewage accident.

The town casts down frowns when their crown and his clown drowned in the brown.

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I used to work at a sewage plant...

... I saw some serious shit.

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Did you hear about the Vietnam veteran who became a sewage worker?

He's seen some shit.

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Did you hear the joke about the sewage back-up at the juice bar?

No? Well, that's okay. It had a shitty punch line.

Story with a moral

Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out t...

Three Engineers are Discussing God

The structural engineer says "I think God must've been a structural engineer. The musculoskeletal system is perfectly designed to allow us to walk upright."

The electrical engineer says "Interesting, but you are obviously wrong. God is an electrical engineer. The nervous system is so compl...

What starts with a P and ends in a C?

The sewage system

A group of Engineers are in a bar and the conversation turns to religion,...

The System Engineer says, "God must be an Systems Engineer, look at the design of the human nervous system. Millions of signals flying back and forward at enormous speeds, all controlled by a massively powerful processing system that can make billions of calculations every second. Only the greatest ...

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Inigo Montoya finally catches up with the six-fingered man

Inigo Montoya finally catches up with the six-fingered man in a monastry in Tibet. He finds him red-robed and shaven-headed sweeping the temple courtyard.

"Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." he says, drawing the six-fingered sword

The six-fingered m...

Three engineers are discussing God's engineering background.

The first one says, "God was clearly an electrical engineer. The human nervous system is a feat of electrical engineering genius!"

The second one says, "Absolutely not! He was a mechanical engineer. The way the muscles and bones interact are mechanically brilliant!"

The third one says,...

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The engineers were discussing God's profession

The mechanical engineer said, "God must be a mechanical engineer. Look at your joints and muscle connections."
The electrical engineer said, "I believe God must be an electrical engineer because your brain, nerves, electrical impulses and shit, just take a look at neurons. No doubt there."
Fi...

An engineer dies and goes to heaven...

He meets St. Peter at the pearly gates, and St. Peter checks the list. St. Peter doesn't find his name, so he says 'sorry, looks like you are supposed to go to the other place'.

So the engineer then goes down to Hell. Soon, he starts seeing things that could be improved. He builds a central a...

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A man with a french mother and german father dies and goes to hell.

The devil tells him

"Since you are both french and german, I will let you choose between going to french hell or german hell!"

The man asks to see them first, so the devil takes him to french hell. People are standing in a never ending lake, up to their chin in sewage and chained by th...

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Dave is playing poker at friends house with a group of mates.

As the game progresses, the urge to unload his bowels becomes overwhelming. Deciding he can't hold on any longer, he runs to the toilet, mid hand, to take a dump.

After unloading a poop King Kong would be proud of, he flushes the toilet, it won't stop going! Filthy poo water starts pouring o...

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The Man who Chose Heaven Instead of Hell

Evan O'Reilly was known throughout America as a truly exceptional man. As the curer of several diseases, the discoverer of many life supporting planets, and the inventor of many new robotics, he was given an option as he neared his death. He was visited by the Angel of Death when he was 108 (his new...

God is obviously a Civil Engineer...

... Only a civil engineer would route a sewage system through a playground.

The devil and three doors

Phil finds himself dead and standing at the gates to hell. The devil approaches and says, "Welcome Phillip, we've been expecting you. Allow me to explain how this works. Everyone that comes here gets an opportunity to choose how they will spend their eternity, behind one of these three doors. Go ah...

Donald Meets The Queen of England!

Together the Queen of England and Donald Trump proceeded to Buckingham Palace in a carriage drawn by six white horses. Regrettably, the rear horse let go of a putrid and lingering fart. The coach stunk like a sewage treatment plant, and the Queen turned to Donald and said: "Mister Trump, please acce...

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