Daylight Saving Jokes

I give it six months

My girlfriend thinks I lasted an hour and two minutes.

Don't lose sleep over it.

Alabama already did this several years ago, deciding to permanently go back to 1845.

Is the government cutting off the bottom of a blanket and sewing it to the top and saying ,"see its longer now".

Last time I got a morning wood in the bus instead the bed.

Because apparently a full 24 hours to celebrate women would have been just a bit much.

that the clock on my microwave will be wrong for the next several months.

But I haven’t been able to come up with anything better than Spice Girls’ 2 become 1

...times have changed.

It's definitely the second worst thing they've ever done.

but at least it's trickling down for a rainy day.

I guess I'm still in the dark.

Eh, I'm not losing any sleep over it.

I need to buy a smaller sundial.

Can't believe they fired me from the clock factory
after all the extra hours I put in.

I was in bed for 7 hours, but when I woke up it was EIGHT HOURS LATER!!!!

When told the reason for Daylight Savings Time, the Old Indian said, "Only the government would believe that you could cut a foot off the top of a blanket, sew it to the bottom, and have a longer blanket."

Shoutout to daylight saving time

On Sunday we jumped back an hour, today we jumped back 50 years.

Thank god for daylight savings

I’ve always got daylight savings time puns to fall back on

Guy who is about to invent daylight savings time: "Haven't you heard?"

To come up with a joke about daylight savings time.

A first grade teacher had twenty-five students in her class and she presented each child in her class the first half of a well known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you.... read more