A teenage potato brings her boyfriend home to meet the parents. "So, what do you do for work?" asks the inquisitive father potato. “Oh, I work for a TV company as a sportscaster." The father potato is furious and tells the boyfriend to leave immediately.

“Why did you do that daddy?!” shrieks the distraught daughter, eyes wide.

The father shouts, “I’m not having *my* daughter hanging around with a commentator!"

What do you call an inquisitive amphibian?

One that axolotl questions

My cocaine dealer is a bit over inquisitive.

He’s always sticking his business in other people’s noses.

Dr. Watson was again impressed by Sherlock Holmes’ diverse set of skills, as Watson asked inquisitively as to what tree Sherlock was planting...

To which Sherlock replied, “Why, that’s a lemon tree, my dear Watson.”

A monkey is sitting in a tree, smoking a joint, when

a lizard walks past. The lizard looks up and says to the monkey “Hey! what are you doing?” The monkey says “Smoking a joint, come up and join me, my cold-blooded friend.”
So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and they have another joint. After a while the lizard says his mouth is ‘d...

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[NSFW] A little boy crawls under the covers while his parents are asleep

The dad wakes up and notices the boy is staring in between the mothers legs.
"What's that dad?" Asks the boy inquisitively.
"It's a pussy and a cunt" replies the dad.
"Can I touch it?" Asks the boy
"NO!" Shouts the dad. "If you touch the pussy the cunt will wake up!"

Why do inquisitive peppers annoy people?

Because they get jalapeño business.

A Halloween joke?

A homeless man named Sturgis was walking down to his town's Human Resources to apply for housing assisstance. When he gets there, he sees some strange creatures in line ahead of him. Cousin It from the Adams' family was there, as well as the Looney Tunes version of Mr. Hyde. Among them was your typi...

"I caught your Johny playing doctor with my Susie" shouted little Susie's mom

Little johny's mom :" you know kids, they are a bit inquisitive at times."

Little Susie's mom: "inquisitive?? He would have operated her tonsils out had I not caught them on time".

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Put to sleep

So this inquisitive pan-dimensional space monster is out on vacation and decides to check out this little dive bar on Earth (in Detroit) that had some decent reviews on Yelp.

In order to do so he had to first take on a suitable corporal form adhering to local biological esthetics and so he c...

Johnny was daydreaming in class when the teacher called on him

“Johnny, if there are five birds on a wire and one gets shot how many are left?”

After thinking for a brief second Johnny responds “zero”

The teacher looks at him inquisitively and states. “Johnny, five minus one is four”

To which Johnny replies “yes but if you shoot one bird t...

I'm a middle aged man. I have many friends on Facebook. Some of them are women. I spend quite a bit of time chatting with them. Life is good!

Joyce is one of them.. Very hot, around 30-35 years old. When I'm chatting with her, I lose all sense of time.

One day she tells me "My husband's going out of town on business this Sunday. Why don't you come over? I'll be alone in the house :-)"

"What if he comes back while I'm there?"...

Little Johnny, a young American boy, is down at the shops when..

He sees a group of disgruntled looking Australian tourists holding maps and wandering around.

Being the inquisitive young lad that he is he decides to try and find out a bit about them. Although he cant understand a word they're saying he quickly learns that they're from an ancient Australian...

A blind guy walks in a diner...

He sits down at a table and the owner comes up to him.
"Hello sir, goodevening would you like to see a menu or do you know what you want?"
To which the man replies," I'm sorry I'm blind but I'll tell you what, bring me a dirty fork from for recommended plate."
Confused, but interested th...

Stalin is giving a speech in front of a large audience.

Suddenly, he's interrupted by a loud sneeze. Stalin stops talking and asks in an ominous tone: "Who just sneezed?" The audience is silent.

"Very well," says Stalin. "We'll do it my way, and believe me, I *will* identify the sneezer." The audience dares not speak.

"Very well," says Sta...

A three-year-old walked up to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctors office.

He inquisitively asked the lady, "Why is your stomach so big?"

She replied, "I am having a baby."

With big eyes, he asked, "Is the baby in your stomach?"

She answered, "He sure is."

Then the little boy, with a puzzled look, asked, "Is it a good baby?"

She said, "Oh...

It’s 1961, and a NASA scientist is sitting in his office when an intern bursts in

“Sir! Sir! The Russians...”

The scientist looks inquisitively at him. “Yes? What about them?”

The intern takes a moment to catch his breath and says, “The Russians have gone into space!”

The scientist jumps out of his chair. “ALL OF THEM?”

“No, just one.”

The scien...

I took my son the park to play when we stumbled across two dogs mating.....

My son being the adorable curious little guy he is stopped stared and asked me

“what are them doggies doing daddy?”

Now me being a modern father wanted to enlighten my boy with real world facts and information....... however also being an easily embarrassed stumbling fool of a man I bl...

Makes you think

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of your hairs white,...

A young boy and his dad went out fishing one fine morning.

A young boy and his dad went out fishing one fine morning.

After a few quiet hours out in the boat, the boy became curious about the world around him.

He looked up at his dad and asked "How do fish breath under water?"

His dad thought about it for a moment, then replied, "I rea...

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Constipation

A nun walks into liquor store and asks for a half whiskey. The shopkeeper looks at her inquisitively, she adds,

"It's for Mother Superior's constipation."

So the shopkeeper says, "OK."

She pays for the whiskey and leaves. Two hours later, the shopkeeper closes the store and walk...

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NSFW wife in a coma

A man and his wife are driving down a country lane when a deer runs in front of them, causing them to swerve and hit a tree. The husband is unharmed in the incident but the woman unfortunately hits her head and enters a coma.


Months roll by and the woman still remains coma stricken, with ...

Lawyer and the devil

So a young lawyer is sitting in his office when the devil appears in front of him.

"I've got an offer for you" the devil explains

"Go on...." Says the young lawyer

"Well from here out your practice will grow 10 fold, your partners will all respect you, your clients will all lov...

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Little Timmy woke up one morning desperate to pee.

He bounded out of bed and hurtled across the landing to the main bathroom. Eager not to cause an upset, he carefully prised open the bathroom door.
In the bathroom, Timmy's sister, Lucy, was shaving her legs. Unfortunately, she caught a spot on her razor, causing a stab of pain. Blood started to ...

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The Watchmaker

The Boy was due to meet his friends down the third alley from the green sign. The bar at the end of that alley, they had said, was a place where spirits and souls mixed together with the languid flow of warm summer air.

But The Boy had started drinking when the sun was still ascending, and n...

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A nudist walks into a bar...

He sits down at a barstool and asks the bartender for a pint. The bartender brings him a pint and says, "Hey son, I noticed you had a butt plug in when you walked in. Kinda odd for a nudist like yourself, don't you think?"

The nudists sighs and says, "There is actually a story behind that...

A Midwest farmer was describing his lifestyle to a touring group of city folks.

"One of the benefits of this profession," he explained, "is that we have built-in weather predictions."


"What do you mean by that?" asked one inquisitive visitor.


"When the cows are standing," the farmer explained, "it means no rain is likely for the next twenty-four hours. W...

A Newly Wed Chinese Couple Go on Their Honeymoon

They get to the hotel late. The bride is visibly nervous and the groom is patiently and lovingly trying to reassure her.

He says "You don't need to worry about anything. Anything you want, I do for you."

Feeling a bit calmer she inquisitively looks at him and says "anything?"

"A...

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2 Drunks in a pick-up truck

Are parked on a gravel road when they see the Sheriff pull in behind them. The passenger starts to panic but the driver says "It's cool man, just chug your beer, rip off the label, stick it on your forehead, and stash the bottle under the seat." So the sheriff gets to the truck door and sees 2 drunk...

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Once an adventurer came across a tribe of men

They welcomed him, fed him and invited him to stay for the night.

Being inquisitive he wondered how the men got along without women. *"Pardon my frankness"* he said, *"how can you live with out women? I imagine it's frustrating to not get any relief"*

They told him they'll show him in ...

Zebra dies and goes to heaven.

When he arrives at the Pearly Gates, St. Peter greets him and informs him that all newcomers to heaven are allowed a single question to ask of The Almighty.

Pete gestures to a magnificent pedestal nearby and says to Zebra, "just step up there and ask away."

Zebra walks over to the pede...

there are no stupid questions.

but there are a lot of inquisitive idiots.

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