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Colours Jokes

What do you call it when a chameleon can't change colours anymore?

A reptile dysfunction
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My pet chameleon can't change colours. I'm very worried about him. So I fed him a Viagra.

Because he has a reptile disfunction.

Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu...

A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and it's been confirmed the problem was not Bird Flu.

The cause of death appeared to be from vehicular impacts, however, during analysis it was noted that varying colours of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws.

By analysing...
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Americans are the best at solving Rubik’s Cube

They have a long history of sorting and separating colours
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I got some black and white tattoos done in shapes a few years ago, and anytime my wife gets upset she just lies on me and colours them in...

I guess sometimes, she just needs a shoulder to crayon.

Credit u/HugoZHackenbush2
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If you think colours aren't funny

then you lack a sense of hue-mour
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I told my therapist that I was seeing strange colours.

He told me they were just pigments of my imagination.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The children began to identify the colours by their colour:

Red -> Raspberry
Yellow -> Lemon
Green -> Lime
Orange -> Orange

Finally the teacher gave them all HONEY flavoured candy. None of them could identify the taste.

The teacher said: ‘I will give you all a clue. It’s what your mother may call your father’

One l...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Most people have Homochromia, where their eyes are the same colour. I've got Heterochromia, and my eyes are different colours. So basically, God made me and said:

"You've got the most gorgeous eyes! No homo"

Did you ever realize that the colours on the LGBT flag are actually all straight

Unless it blows?
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I couldn't find any neutral colours while shopping for paint. I asked the assistant if they had any.

He replied "Not currently, but I have grey taupes for the future"
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My least favourite colour is brown.

I hate it more than all the other colours combined.
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What did Donald Trump say when he learnt black and white weren’t real colours?

Fake hues
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I asked my niece

if she had learned her colours yet. I pointed out something and asked what colour it was.

Each time she answered correctly.

Then, while heading for the door, she said, “Uncle Jonathan, I think you should try figuring out some of this stuff for yourself!”
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Roses are red, violets are blue.

When it comes to flower colours, the person who made this has no clue.
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TIL The New Jersey Devils have never changed their logo or uniform design/colours.

No new New Jersey jersey.
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