What do you call a rainbow without any colors?

A plainbow.

Credit to my 6 year old.

I was caught stealing a rainbow once

Ended up getting thrown in prism

What do you find at the end of a rainbow?

A “W”

( joke from my 8 yo daughter)

How much does a Rainbow weigh?

I don’t know for sure, it’s Light!

Hahahaha as far as I am aware, I just created this joke and I could not be more proud of myself!!!!

Why is a rainbow the pride flags colors.

Because it’s the first thing you see when the sun comes out.

How much does a rainbow weigh?

Not much, they're pretty light.

Where do bad rainbows go?

Prism

Only a light sentence

What do you call allies who color things in rainbows to show support for Pride?

Dye-er Straights!

I asked my five year old daughter what she wanted for her birthday and she giggled, "I want unicorns, rainbows and fairies!"

Okay, LSD it is!

Why are rainbows always happy?

Because they just got out of prism.

I ate some rainbow candy that I was a little concerned about;

I'm okay now; it passed with flying colors

What happens to a rainbow when it breaks the law?

It goes through the prism system

Bought a new camera today…

and wanted to test it out. I was looking for a good subject and found a salon where a guy was cutting a woman’s hair. I went in and asked him if I could take some pictures. He said she wanted a rainbow look, and it would be great to get some before and after pics to capture the coloring process.
...

Where do you take a pie to find out how much it weighs?

Somewhere over the rainbow...

...weigh a pie.

It's illegal to reach the end of a rainbow

If you find it, you go to prism.

My 5 yo son, Samuel, came up with this knock knock joke at his birthday and we were all in tears..

"Knock knock"

"Who's there?"

"Sam"

"Sam who?"

"Samwhere over the rainbow..."

What did Lieutenant Worf say when he made rainbow T-shirts with his son?

“Today *is* a good day to dye!”

What do you call a magician wearing a rainbow colored suit?

Hue-dini

What do you call a deceitful little criminal who lives at the end of the rainbow?

A leprechaun artist!

Who is the Greek goddess of rainbows?

Diffractodite.

I hate optimists.

They'll jump out of a plane expecting sunshine and rainbows to cushion their fall. Meanwhile, I'll look both ways before crossing the street and get hit by the optimist.

The sky had a rainbow color to it today.

I guess the sun's coming out.

I have a remarkable ability to see numbers as rainbow colors

But I can only count to seven

My mom called and told me granpa is now somewhere over the rainbow and gone to his glory.

Yeah, I saw him on the news - he had a hell of a Pride parade.

Katy Perry sang that after a hurricane comes a rainbow, but you know what else comes after a hurricane?

A moron in a suit.

I was at a barber shop in Bangkok and I asked to get my hair dyed, and for the barber to surprise me. I noticed that it was taking a bit longer than hair dyeing normally would, and when I looked at the finished job in the mirror, I noticed that they were in rainbow swirls.

When I asked the barber, "What is this?" he told me,"Well, it's a Thai dye."

What's Ed Sheeran's favorite Lucky Charms? The Rainbow and Horseshoe.

He's in love with the shape of U.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My cock is rainbow coloured

Tell your mum to stop changing her damn lipstick

Leprechaun's Lucky Rainbow

Three men find a Leprechaun and he says, "I will snap my fingers and we will be at the top of my rainbow." With a quick snap the men are on the rainbow.

The Leprechaun then says, "As you slide down the rainbow, yell out what you want and it will appear at the bottom."

The first man sli...

Photons from a rainbow hit you at almost 300 million m/s and you don’t even flinch

I guess they are pretty light

A Man finds a Leprechaun at the end of a rainbow

Suprised the Leprechaun tries to hide


The man says "I found you, can I have my pot of gold?"


The Leprechaun unwillingly gives him the pot, "I don't usually give this away free, this stuff doesn't grow on trees you know..."


........


Just 1 year later the ma...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Old man and a rainbow haired boy in subway.

i've heard it in russian, so i'll try to translate it.
So, once an old man take a ride in subway and was confronted by a young person with brightly colored hairs, piercings everywhere possible and torn cloths. So, the old man seats calmly and stares at boy. He noticed that and asks: "what are yo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young punk with a rainbow colored mohawk says to an old man who’s staring at him: “what’s the matter old man, haven’t you ever done anything crazy in your life?”

The old man responds: “I have, actually. 17 years ago I got stupid drunk and fucked a parrot. I was just wondering if you’re my son”

My mental health is like a rainbow

All over the spectrum

Why did the T-Rex attack the LGBTQ parade?

It wanted to Taste the Rainbow.

For my chemistry homework, I was supposed to write a thousand words on acid.

I tried, but my pen turned into a rainbow-coloured giraffe and then the desk melted.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why isn’t a vertical rainbow gay?

Because it’s straight.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I met a guy who claimed his jizz was rainbow colored

I asked him how that felt, to which he responded:

“I can’t complain”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My kids will be friends with people of all colors of the rainbow.

That means no black people.


(Credit goes to a person on either America's Got Talent or Britain's Got Talent, can't remember which)

What the sound of a rainbow laughing?

Hue hue hue hue

A rainbow is doing a drug deal...

The cops pull up and the rainbow yells "I don't want to go back to prism!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two Priests and Two Nuns have dinner with His Holiness, the Pope.

Two priests are fishing on lake outside of Rome. It's a beautiful day, the sun is light, and the water is smooth. Suddenly the first priests fishing rod bends alarmingly; he has hooked a huge fish! It's a struggle but he managed to reel it in. It's a beautiful rainbow coloured fish and big enough to...

The youth of today don't know how to make those 90s rainbow tie-dye t-shirts...

..I guess it's a dying art.

In the year 2010, the Lord came unto Noah and said:

“Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flash before me.
Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unen...

Bob and Rose are getting on in years, and their memories aren't what they used to be.

They make a visit to the doctor, who does a thorough check-up, before telling them that there's nothing to worry about, and that this is just a symptom of getting older.

"One thing you could try", the doc says, "is to write down the things you need to remember. Many of my patients say that he...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Can you tell your mom to stop wearing different lipsticks every day?

My dick's starting to look like a fucking rainbow!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A young man gets a flat tire and must find a place to stay for the night...

He knocks on the door of a nearby house and an old man greets him. The old man hears out the young mans predicament, and allows him to stay for a night. Later the young man hears strange noises coming from a red door on the other side of his room but goes to sleep anyway. Asking the old man the ne...

The Three Paddies find a Leprechaun...

The Three Paddies find a leprechaun, who brings them to the top of his rainbow.
“Slide down the rainbow, and shout out something, and you’ll find it at the bottom,” He says to them.
Paddy the Englishman slides down and shouts gold and he lands in huge pot of gold.
Paddy the Scotsman slides...

Once upon a time, a King wanted to have some fun...

.... He went on a podium and said loudly: "I will give half of my fortune to anyone who manages to tell me a lie that I, myself, admit that it's a lie."

An old man walked to the King and said: "I can draw rainbows wherever I want."

The King replied: "That's true, I saw you making one y...

I ate a rainbow-colored Altoid

It was bi-curiously strong.

I hosted a costume party a while back

I understood most of the costumes, but there was one guy with a rainbow clown wig, a captain America shield, an invisible dog, and a kimono. I must've sat there for 20 minutes trying to figure it out, but nothing made sense. So I went up to ask him directly.

Me: "Hey, nice costume"

Him...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man deposits $1,000 cash into his bank account every day

The bank employees start getting a little suspicious and tell the manager about the customer. The manager tells them to let him know next time he makes a deposit. Surely enough, the next day, he comes with 1k in cash to deposit into his account. The tellers tell the man that the manager would like t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

True story

My wife comes at home in a hurry:

**—** Honey, I'm late for my gynecologist appointment! Don't have time to shower and shave, I'll just wash down there and I'll go. 5 min later she rushes out the door.

When she comes back, she's angry as hell:

**—** That son of a bitch, he's bee...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The true story of cinderella

Cinderella wanted to go to the ball, but her mom said she had work to do.

So she finished all her chores and asked "please, please, let me go to the ball!"

But mom said she had nothing to wear.

"Oh, i sewwed this dres out of old scraps. Isn't it beautiful?" Cinderella pleaded....

What can Skittles do that guys can't?

Come in a rainbow of flavors.

A man travels to Ireland for the first time.

His flight to Dublin arrives in the morning, and he travels into the countryside to stay for a few days. He goes to visit the Blarney Stone, feeds some animals at a ranch, and even gets to experience a rainstorm with a beautiful rainbow at the end. After his countryside excursion, he heads back to D...

Two witches were arguing about who was the better witch

One rainy day inside the coven HQ, Meredith and Wendy were arguing about who was the better witch.

"I'm the superior spellcaster", boasted Meredith. She raised her wand into the air, and conjured up a small cloud. It snowed over Wendy's head, dropping hailstones the size of marbles.

"...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Princess with the cursed hand

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess who had been cursed from young - any object that she touched with her hands instantly melted in just about three seconds, before disintegrating aftwerwards. She'd even killed her own father this way.

The Queen was desperate to remove this terri...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call the ban on same sex marriage?

Rainbow Sex Seize

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A convent of Catholic nuns receives a letter saying the Pope himself will be visiting in just a few days

They are all very excited and nervous. Mothers Mary, Agnes, and Isadore take it upon themselves to prepare the convent to receive His Holiness and plan a simple but delicious meal of fresh caught fish from the local lake with herbs and vegetables from their own garden.

Agnes goes to the loca...

A comedian was on vacation in London.

A comedian was on a vacation in London when he came across a large crowd. He pushed and squeezed his way past the ocean of people and saw the Royal Family who were on their way to have lunch. As he takes out his phone to snap a photo, he saw from the corner of his eye a shady man pushing past the cr...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Six Letters of the Alphabet

Billy was a boy in kindergarten. At the end of the school day, the teacher gave the class a simple task.

“Ok class, I want you to go home tonight and learn the first six letters of the alphabet.”

So Billy left school determined to learn what the teacher had asked. When he got home, he ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A teenager is walking down the street...

He's dressed up in all leather with spikes and studs and has a mohawk dyed like a rainbow. He notices an old man on a porch up ahead staring him down intensely. He just smiles to himself and keeps walking.

As he passes the house, he sees the old man has yet to take his eyes off him. Finally h...

Don't be racist! I takes all colors to make a rainbow.

Except black. There's no black in a rainbow.


Credits to vinesauce

Hugh Hefner was sitting in the Playboy mansion, admiring 'the view'

He then heard there were a group of people at the door, trying to sell him flowers.

He went out and said, "Can I help you?"
"HI sir! We are from Rainbow Florists and would like to know if you want to buy some beautiful flowers for your beautiful ladies?"

"Get the hell off my propert...

Why did the unicorn cross the road?

To make the rainbow connection!

My grandfather was always playing pranks on people.

My grandfather was always playing pranks on people. He was originally from Ireland before he moved to the US. He fit all of the stereotypes of an Irishman, having red hair and beard, constantly being at the bar, and having an accent so thick that I could barely understand him even though I knew him ...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.