The 55+ Best Color Jokes

Today I thought of a color that doesn't exist...

but then I realized it was just a pigment of my imagination.

Why does Batman only wear dark colors? Easy. Batman doesn't want to get shot. Why does Robin only wear bright colors?

Easy.

Batman doesn't want to get shot.

A blonde colors her hair red and moves countryside

She meets a farmer and challenges him: "If I can guess your profession, I get your dog for free."
The farmer agrees.
The blonde declares that he is a farmer, and wins the bet.
As she's stuffing the animal into the trunk of her Fiat, the farmer says: "if I can guess your real hair color, ca...

Sometimes when people are sad, I let them color in my tattoos.

Sometimes people just need a shoulder to crayon.

What weighs less than the color blue?

Light blue

My least favorite color is purple.

I hate it more than red and blue combined.

Whats a fedora clad, neck bearded gentlemen's favorite color?

M'genta

What's it called when a chameleon can't change its colors anymore?

A reptile dysfunction.

What has an N, an I, two G's, an E, and an R and can be used to describe people of a certain color?

'Ginger'

I was recently diagnosed with color-blindness.

It came out of the green.

What color does your skin turn when you pour molten gold onto it?

Au-burn

^He^^He^^^He^^^^He

[Translated] A man saw a good deal and bought 20 panties of the same pattern and color to his wife.

Wife : Oh My God,now people will think I never change my panties.

Husband : Which people?

(Hope the joke didnt get lost in translation)

All of the heroes of Overwatch have natural hair colors...

Because heroes never dye.

A black guy in a library asked me where the colored printers were.

I said, "Dude, it's 2021, you can use any printer you want."

Did you hear about the guy that tells everyone what the colors on the graph mean?

That guy’s a legend.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There is this African-American kid that goes to school and notices that the teachers treat the white kids better than the kids of color.

So he goes home and paints himself white and shows his dad. "Hey dad look im white!"

His dad kicks his ass, and says "Alright go show your mother."

The kid goes "Hey mom look im white!"

His mom beats the shit out of him then tells him to go show his grandma.

The kid aga...

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If a guy remembers the color of your eyes after the first date,

chances are... you have small boobs.

My friend bioengineered a cannabis plant that grows large, colorful flowers.

I got to see it, and I must admit, it was pretty dope.

Look, I'm all for coloring books...

but connect-the-dots? That's where I draw the line.

I was just diagnosed with color blindness...

... it came completely out of the purple.

What was Helen Keller's favorite color?

Cordaroy

I was forced to swallow purple food color.

I feel violated.

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Why do Americans spell it as 'color' and not 'colour'?

Because fuck u that's why.

Why did Worf change his hair color?

It was a good day to dye.

My black friend asked me where to find the color copier

I said it's 2015 and he can use whatever copier he wants to

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What’s the difference between this joke and a nudist soaked in food coloring?

One is nude in dye and the other died in new.

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What's the stinkiest color?

Poople.

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I'm so tired of all these "historically" based movies and books that change the characters' skin color to pander to the masses

Like, what's up with this Jesus being white bullshit.

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The color palette of most public restrooms in public beaches and forests is on the depressing earth-tones and brown side…

…I mean, shit.

Why do we color eggs for Easter?

Because Jesus DYED for our sins.

Happy Easter!

I wish orange was a common color option for android phones

Would make it easier to compare them to Apples.

I can laugh in color

Hue hue hue hue

What do you call a person who studies the color blue?

A cyantologist.

I wanted to tell you all about a color I made up.....

but, as it turns out, it was just a pigment of my imagination.

Color vs Colour, Favorite vs Favourite, Neighbor vs Neighbour

British English: I think you're having problem understanding these words.
American English: no u

I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom...

...until they are flashing behind you.

Last night I had a dream where I experienced a completely new color.

It was a pigment of my imagination

I hired a guy to stain my entry way but he used a very deep brown color that I don’t like.

So I fired him and told him to “never darken my door again.”

I swallowed some food coloring. My doctor says I'm OK

But I feel like I've dyed a little inside

Today I saw this absolutely stunning color that I've never seen before! It was indescribable, but when I blinked, it disappeared.

I guess it was just a pigment of my imagination.

I just found out that I’m color-blind.

This came right out of the purple.

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Don’t you hate those virtue signaling people that say “I don’t see color.”?

Fuck the blind, am I right?

I had a vasectomy. Did you know that it actually doesn't prevent your wife from getting pregnant it just changes the color of the baby.

Or at least that's what my mailman said.

I just got diagnosed with color blindness.

I gotta say this diagnosis came out of the orange.

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Two Jews were arguing whether or not white is a color

After arguing for a week they went for an advice to their rabbi
Rabbi looked into an old book and said yes, white is a color.
A week later same Jews were arguing for a week whether black is a color
Went to the same rabbi who said yes, black is also a color
See!!! says one of them, I d...

What is the color of wind?

blew..

A contractor is taking a tour with a client discussing color themes. GREEN SIDE UP!

The contractor yelled out the living room window as he turned his attention back to the confused client. "Ah yes you definitely want a neutral tone for a room of this size and a decorator can help pick out the right furniture to accent." The client relaxed and completely agreed with his insight. "...

Did you hear the tragic story about the man who sat in food coloring?

He dyes in the end.

What do you call colorful secret police?

The RGB

I accidentally drank the water we used to color eggs for Easter.

I think I dyed a little inside.

I was on acid and I actually tasted colors.

Tasted a lot like paint.

Last night my wife said she was divorcing me because I am always mixing up colors

This came out of the yellow

What's the difference between grey and gray?

One is a color, and the other is a colour.

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In honor of America's upcoming Independence Day, do you know why America spells "behavior", "color", and "humor" the way they do?

Because **fuck u**, that's why!

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I told a black man this morning I don’t see color...

He told me that’s nice, he still had to write me a ticket for running a red light.

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