The first few times you get hit by AC, it really hertz

But after that, it'll barely phase you.

REM got it wrong, Kenneth

Hertz is the frequency. Watt is power.

Why can't humans hear over or under a certain frequency?

It hertz too much.

What happens if you slap a tuning fork?

It hertz

What did the monitor say when it gets hurt

Oww that Hertz

What did Nikola Tesla say after being shocked by his Tesla Coil?

That hertz alot

The girl who works at the car rental company refuses to go out with me

and it really Hertz.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Buying a car from Hertz is like marrying a Prostitute

It may look good on the outside, but you have no idea whose been in it or what they've done to it.

Doctor: Does your migraine happen at regular frequency?

Me: Yes, it really hertz.

I slammed my hand in the door at the car rentals

It Hertz...

What did the network/IT man say to the doctor?

IT hertz when IP.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got hit by a rental car on the way to work yesterday

Fucking Hertz.

I've been watching my HTZ stock go down.

It really Hertz.

BREAKING NEWS!

Man gets hit by a rental car.

Says, “It Hertz.”

When your mom slaps you with high frequency

It hertz

I shocked myself on the power outlet today

It doesn't feel good. It hertz

What did the lightning strike survivor say when interviewed?

"It was shockingly powerful... Like, it really Hertz."

Why can't our ears hear very high pitched sounds?

Because it hertz.

How do you describe the pain of getting slapped in the face 100 times in two seconds?

50 Hertz

My moms response time for a slap in the face used to be 1ms

and it hertz alot.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend bought a loud speaker

He suddenly played a beat drop ass song.


I screamed.


He asked, "What's wrong?"


I said "It hertz."

In response to the invitation for a rather unusual reunion of all time greats.......

\* Newton said he'd drop in.
\* Socrates said he'd think about it.
\* Ohm resisted the idea.
\* Boyle said he was under too much pressure.
\* Darwin said he'd wait to see what evolved.
\* Pierre and Marie Curie radiated enthusiasm.
\* Volta was electrified at the prospe...

I beat my meat frequently

My arm hertz a lot afterwards

I personally identify as one cycle per second.

Because everything hertz.

What is the difference between AC and DC?

AC Hertz more.

What happens if you drop a computer on your feet?

It hertz

I turned on the radio and forgot I had the volume maxed out.

Now my left and right ear hertz a lot.

You know there's a unit of measurement for pain?

Its called Hertz

The frequency of bad physics jokes in this sub...

It Hertz

What did the electrician say when he electrocuted himself?

That Hertz!

I tried to think of an electricity pun

Now my head hertz

A hire van ran over my foot today.

Really Hertz!

Someone insulted me on my monitor's refresh rate

Right where it hertz

People asked me how it feels when you stick your finger in an electricity outlet?

To be honest, it Hertz.

A Young Boy Goes to His Father, Covering His Ears

He says, "Dad, I've got a problem." The dad asks, "What's wrong?" His son winces and says, "It's my hearing, Dad. Everything I hear hurts my ears." The dad looks his son in the eyes and says, "Son, all sound hertz."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I went to a prostitute and asked what her rate was for handjobs

She told me about ten strokes per second

I think it Hertz

What do you say when you break up with an electrician?

Watt is love?

Baby don't hertz me.

Don't hertz me.

N-ohm-ore.

N-ohm-ore.

My family’s new truck

I remember once when I was a younger kid living with my parents, my dad gave me some money to go down to the grocery store to pay the electricity bill.

Thinking I was a super lucky kid & kind of smart, I decided to buy scratch-off tickets instead. Surprise, surprise - yeah, none of them w...

Laser joke

A blue laser hertz twice as much as a red laser.

Got in a fight with frequency today

We’ve been friends for ages, so it kinda hertz.

Did you know that seals can't hear bass?

It's true - the seal hearing range bottoms out at 1000 Hertz.

No wonder they don't like clubbing.

I just electrocuted myself

How do you current-ly feel?

I'm kind of shocked

Watt, I didn't hear you

I said it hertz a lot

If you have bought a new monitor, don't forget to update your refreshrate.

Otherwise, it only Hertz in your wallet.

IT hurts

Rick Grimes: A network engineer went to the doctor.
Coral: Shut up, Dad!
RG: He said, "It hurts when I pee".
Coral: .......
RG: IT Hertz when IP, Coral!

Why do light bulbs burn out with frequency?

Because it hertz.

I can tell you first hand what standing next to a loudspeaker feels like.

It hertz.

What did Tesla say as he invented alternated current?

"Aw, that hertz!"

What did frequency say to noise?

Ouch! That hertz!

I once listened to very loud music for too long

My ear still hertz

I’ve been trying to measure electromagnetic radiation by counting the number of oscillations of the perpendicular electric and magnetic fields per second

My head was sore after a minute, but now it mega hertz

Physics Joke

I just bought a pair of bad frequency shoes. I keep doppling over and my foot hertz.

Red Neck Computer Dictionary

* LOG ON: Makin’ a woodstove hot.
* LOG OFF: Don’t add no more wood.
* MONITOR: Keepin’ an eye on the wood stove.
* DOWNLOAD: Gittin’ the farwood off the truck.
* MEGA HERTZ: When you’re not keerfull gittin’ the farwood.
* FLOPPY DISC: Whutcha git from trying to tote too much far...

What happens when you get a lot of electroshocks within a short period of time?

It hertz.

A boy was snapping rubber bands on his friends arm

He kept doing it in the same spot every second, over and over again until the friend eventually said, "Ouch, that one Hertz."

A physicist walks into a bar...

It Hertz.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's it like having sex with a wave?

Fucking hertz.

TIFU by kicking my computer monitor...

and my foot still hertz.

I am going to change my name to time being.

Because everyone is always doing stuff for the time being.

Hertz donut.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Horse Names banned by the British Horse Racing Authority

Chit Hot

Chocolate Starfish

Choke the Chicken

Curl One Off

Dick Face

Harry Azzol

Harry Balls

Harry Monk

Hugh G Dildeaux

Hugh G Rection

Hugh Gass Kisser

Hugh Gorgy

Hugh Janus

Ima Hoare

Ima Goodlay
...

I keep trying to think of the unit for frequency...

It hertz my head.

A man's ears were exposed to a high frequency sound...

He said "It hertz."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(Warning, this is worse than those laffy-taffy jokes) Why don't engineers have sex with much frequency?

Because it hertz!

2 sound waves... (OC)

...were travelling to their destination when they suddenly crash into each other.

The first wave says "Hey, are you okay?"

The second wave says "Oh I'm fine

It just Hertz"

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