Hertz Jokes - 60 Hilarious Hertz Jokes

What happens when you hit someone at a high frequency

It hertz

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The first few times you get hit by AC, it really hertz

But after that, it'll barely phase you.

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My husband beats me at regular intervals

Hertz

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got hit by a rental car on the way to work yesterday

Fucking Hertz.

gigahertz ?

it sure does ; especially when i do it with frequency !!

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What do you say when you break up with an electrician?

Watt is love?

Baby don't hertz me.

Don't hertz me.

N-ohm-ore.

N-ohm-ore.

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What did the electrical engineer say when he got shocked? .

That hertz.

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What would happen if...

Someone was to slap you at high frequency??

Well the definite answer is IT HERTZ a lot!

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What does a lightbulb cry out when it flickers?

Ouch, it hertz!

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I'm very sensitive to sounds of a certain frequency.

When I hear them it hertz.

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I turned on the radio and forgot I had the volume maxed out.

Now my left and right ear hertz a lot.

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My moms response time for a slap in the face used to be 1ms

and it hertz alot.

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What happens if you slap a tuning fork?

It hertz

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I tried to think of an electricity pun

Now my head hertz

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Scientist has a pain that comes back periodically.

Keeps saying "aaaaah it Hertz"

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Why do light bulbs burn out with frequency?

Because it hertz.

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Space Tourism

One of the car hire companies was looking at diversification, to be able to better cope in the next pandemic.

They started getting interested in the space tourism market, currently dominated by companies such as Blue Origin, Virgin Galactic and SpaceX. They needed a hook to make them stand o...

What did Nikola Tesla say after being shocked by his Tesla Coil?

That hertz alot

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REM got it wrong, Kenneth

Hertz is the frequency. Watt is power.

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A rental van ran over my foot today...

Fucking Hertz!

The frequency of bad physics jokes in this sub...

It Hertz

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Laser joke

A blue laser hertz twice as much as a red laser.

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I slammed my hand in the door at the car rentals

It Hertz...

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What did the lightning strike survivor say when interviewed?

"It was shockingly powerful... Like, it really Hertz."

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I had a party for the worlds greatest historical figures, here are their RSVPs

Isaac Newton: "I'll drop in."

Socrates: "I'll think about it."

Charles Darwin: "I'll wait to see what evolves."

Marie Curie: "I am radiating enthusiasm."

Ivan Pavlov: "I'm positively drooling at the thought."

Albert Einstein: "It will ...

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What were Ron and Nicole's last words to OJ Simpson?

"It HERTZ!"

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What did the monitor say when it gets hurt

Oww that Hertz

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What did the electrician say when he electrocuted himself?

That Hertz!

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I shocked myself on the power outlet today

It doesn't feel good. It hertz

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Why can't our ears hear very high pitched sounds?

Because it hertz.

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Doctor: Does your migraine happen at regular frequency?

Me: Yes, it really hertz.

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Swedish Computer Terms

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I beat my meat frequently

My arm hertz a lot afterwards

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I just electrocuted myself

How do you current-ly feel?

I'm kind of shocked

Watt, I didn't hear you

I said it hertz a lot

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What is the difference between AC and DC?

AC Hertz more.

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How do you describe the pain of getting slapped in the face 100 times in two seconds?

50 Hertz

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BREAKING NEWS!

Man gets hit by a rental car.

Says, “It Hertz.”

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I've been watching my HTZ stock go down.

It really Hertz.

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Someone insulted me on my monitor's refresh rate

Right where it hertz

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What happens if you drop a computer on your feet?

It hertz

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My friend bought a loud speaker

He suddenly played a beat drop ass song.

I screamed.

He asked, "What's wrong?"

I said "It hertz."

If you have bought a new monitor, don't forget to update your refreshrate.

Otherwise, it only Hertz in your wallet.

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Got in a fight with frequency today

We’ve been friends for ages, so it kinda hertz.

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I went to a prostitute and asked what her rate was for handjobs

She told me about ten strokes per second

I think it Hertz

A Young Boy Goes to His Father, Covering His Ears

He says, "Dad, I've got a problem." The dad asks, "What's wrong?" His son winces and says, "It's my hearing, Dad. Everything I hear hurts my ears." The dad looks his son in the eyes and says, "Son, all sound hertz."

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Did you know that seals can't hear bass?

It's true - the seal hearing range bottoms out at 1000 Hertz.

No wonder they don't like clubbing.

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I can tell you first hand what standing next to a loudspeaker feels like.

It hertz.

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I once listened to very loud music for too long

My ear still hertz

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What did Tesla say as he invented alternated current?

"Aw, that hertz!"

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What happens when you get a lot of electroshocks within a short period of time?

It hertz.

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What did frequency say to noise?

Ouch! That hertz!

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IT hurts

Rick Grimes: A network engineer went to the doctor.
Coral: Shut up, Dad!
RG: He said, "It hurts when I pee".
Coral: .......
RG: IT Hertz when IP, Coral!

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A physicist walks into a bar...

It Hertz.

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's it like having sex with a wave?

Fucking hertz.

TIFU by kicking my computer monitor...

and my foot still hertz.

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A boy was snapping rubber bands on his friends arm

He kept doing it in the same spot every second, over and over again until the friend eventually said, "Ouch, that one Hertz."

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What did the Computer Processor say when it was overclocked?

It Hertz.

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I keep trying to think of the unit for frequency...

It hertz my head.

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what did the router say to the doctor?

It hertz when IP.

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I am going to change my name to time being.

Because everyone is always doing stuff for the time being.

Hertz donut.

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