Why are synthetic fibres like the police?

They don't let you breathe.

What kind of murderer has moral fibre?

A cereal killer.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If you don't get enough fibre in your diet

... tough shit

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I once saw this guy walking down the road with a 15ft piece of fibre glass. I asked him "Are you a Pole Vaulter?"

He answered "Nein, I'm a German, but how did you know my name was Walther?"

There was once an angel who was very happy with life because she was very beautiful and she always got to wear pretty, perfect dresses.

One day, when she ran out of clothes to wear, she decided to wash them. When she took her dresses out of the washing machine, she noticed several small pieces of fibre were just stuck randomly on her pieces of dressing.

This incident absolutely traumatized her. She was always known for how pe...

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Statistics show that 73% of people don't have enough fibre in their diets.

Ah well, tough shit

The Rope-a-dope.

Two pieces of string walk into a bar.

The bartender looks them up and down, and asks: "You two aren't pieces of string, are ya?"

To which they both reply: "Why, yes, we are!"

And the bartender turns a bright shade of red and yells: "WE DON'T SERVE YOUR FILTHY KIND HERE!"

...

This huge guy broke into my house last night.

I confronted him but he punched me in the stomach then smacked me across the face. While I lay on the ground he stole my wallet, my phone, and then walked out with my TV.

I didn't manage to scratch him or take a photo but rang the police anyway in the hope they'd at least be able to find a...

After having dug to a depth of 100 meters in a mine, Scottish scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 1000 years...

After having dug to a depth of 100 meters in a mine, Scottish scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 1000 years and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 1000 years ago. Not to be outdone by the Scots, in the weeks that followed, English sc...

In the past

Russian scientists dug 1000 mtr deep and found a copper wire.
They concluded:
“1000 yrs back our ancestors were using copper cable technology”..

American scientists dug 2000 mtr deep and found optic fibre.
They concluded:
“2000 yrs back our ancestors were using optic fibre technol...

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