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Frankenstein Jokes

Dr. Frankenstein enters in a bodybuilding competition

Dr. Frankenstein enters in a bodybuilding competition and finds out he has seriously misunderstood the objective

What did Frankenstein say the first time he got hard?

its alive!!

Mr Darcy, Victor Frankenstein, and Gandalf where standing in a queue, waiting to get into a club, when ...

... an ampersand walks past them, nods to the bouncer, and is let in immediately.

Mr Darcy scoffs and turns to his companions.

"He must be some kind of special character."

How does Dr. Frankenstein keep track of his body parts?

He uses an organ-izer.

Dracula got mad at Frankenstein while they were playing fighting games.

"He vouldn't stop doing the mash!"

What does Dr. Frankenstein call the cemetery?

Human Resources

Whats a smart Frankenstein called?

Frankeinstein.

Who Flips Frankenstein's Pancakes?

Count Spatula.

Dr. Frankenstein went to a body-building competition...

There was a terrible misunderstanding.

What was Dr. Frankenstein’s favourite hobby?

Bodybuilding...

Why didn't Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?

Because he just didn't have the guts to do it again.

I never understood how Dr. Frankenstein got overpowered by his monster...

... I mean, the guy was an amazing body builder.

Why was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?

He couldn’t resistor!

Where did Frankenstein go to get his tattoo done?

Monsters Ink

How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?

He used his frankincense.

What's the difference between Frankenstein and The Cosby Show?

On the Cosby Show, he was both the doctor and the monster.

What did Frankenstein say to his assistant?

“Hey, can you give me a hand?”

I was helping my grandpa fold some laundry yesterday and noticed something odd. On one shirt he had a silloutte of Sherlock Holmes, on another a picture of Harry Potter, on a third was printed an image of Frankenstein, and on a fourth, a girl who appeared to be Anne of Green Gables.

I asked my grandpa, "Are all these graphic shirts really yours?"

"Yes they are, " my grandpa replied sheepishly "I just can't resist buying novel tees."

Did you hear about when the Bride of Frankenstein helped him replace a missing neck bolt?

Turns out, all he needed was a big screw.

How does Frankenstein speak?

Frankly.

Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?

At the second-hand second hand store

You know, with all his flaws, Dr. Frankenstein was a damn good orator.

He really knew how to bring people together.

Doctor Frankenstein created life, via great skill with a surgeon's knife. Igor loved to say, an easier way,

Would have been knocking boots with his wife.

What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?

IT’S A LIIIEEEE!!

People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr Frankenstein.

I’m only trying to make a living.

I saw Frankenstein walk into a body-building competition

He took the name of the competition way too seriously!

The Bride of Frankenstein

Dr. Frankenstein: I took the Bride Of Frankenstein to the Caribbean last month.


Igor: Jamaica?


Dr. Frankenstein: Yes.

Dr. Frankenstein finally became popular enough in his own right to gain unlimited access to cemeteries and morgues for his creations.

I guess to the Victor goes the spoils.

Dr. Frankenstein is experimenting with a new monster made with a cheese body.

It's Frankenstein's Muenster.

Why was Dr Frankenstein never lonely?

He was good at making friends.

This one time Frankenstein entered a bodybuilding contest..

His entry left the judges speechless.

I once tried to Frankenstein a small dog with a cow

It was a terrier bull idea.

Frankenstein's monster went to a party

The Bride asks him if he wants to dance, but the monster declines. She asks him if he has Two Left Feet, and he confirms it. "It's not my fault. The Doctor couldn't find a right foot for me."

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What was Dr. Frankenstein's dog's name?

Scraps

Frankenstein's monster was really worried one day

"Pull yourself together", said Frankenstein

Why can't Frankenstein have kids?

His nuts are on his neck

My company recently hired Frankenstein’s monster to run our HR department. He’s surprisingly good at it.

Turns out he’s a real people person.

Knowledge is knowing that Frankenstein is not the monster

SparkNotes is knowing that Frankenstein *is* the monster.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?
Dracula.
Dracula who?
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Frankenstein.
Frankenstein who?
Knock.
Who’s there?
The Knock Less Monster.

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Why was Frankenstein's monster so pissed off?

You would be pissed too if your nuts were on your neck..

I went to visit my old friend frankenstein's monster

as we were talking I said, "It's just uncanny, you have your mothers eyes."

he smiled and replied, "yes, but she didn't need them anymore"

A man introduces his two kids.

He says, “These are my children, Frankincense and Bob.”

The other man responds, “Oh, I thought the other child would have been named Myrrh.”

The father responds, “Oh no, we get that all the time. You see my wife and I are HUGE fans of particular books and movies so we named them after ...

Can we Frankenstein Monster a joke?

i propose we see who can come up with the best joke. we submit a part, someone else adds to it. maybe 3 parts? maybe not? let's see who can come up with the funniest crowd sourced joke.

What's Frankenstein's favourite part of a company?

Human resources

A monster party

To celebrate Halloween, the classic Halloween monsters decided to throw a party. At full swing, some of the monsters decided to have a drink and sit down.

The werewolf said, “I can’t believe everyone came!”

Dracula chuckled and said, “Yes, this is a good party.”

Frankenstein’s m...

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What do you call it when Frankenstein's Monster gets a boner?

A reserrection.

What did the conspiracy theorist say when they saw frankensteins monster?

it’s aLIE!!

People say Frankenstein's monster had a temper,

but actually he was surprisingly level headed.

Why can you always trust Frankenstein's monster?

He's got somebody else's back, he could probably handle yours.

On a first date

HER: So, are you religious?

FRANKENSTEIN: I'm part Catholic

HER: Oh…your mother or your father?

FRANKENSTEIN: My foot.

Bodybuilding contest

Frankenstein signed up for a bodybuilding contest,

later to find out...

he was at the wrong place.

"ITS ALIVE, ITS ALIVE!!!" - Frankenstein's dream

A necrophilliac' worst nightmare.

Did you ever hear about the doctor who was so obsessed with body building that it killed him?

I think his name was Frankenstein.

Comic-Con Mysteries Panel

A friend of mine went to Comic-Con in San Diego a few years back, and attended a panel on mystery books and movies. Authors and actors there, a large panel, nearly 20 people. Most of the cast of the Sherlock Holmes movies and a few Agatha Christie adaptation were there. One of the audience members a...

What do you title a book about a Jewish girl brought back to life?

The Diary of Anne Frankenstein

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I used to love The Village People

until they came at me with torches.

-Gay Frankenstein

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A group of eels are chilling in the river...

When a full tuxedo comes drifting downstream.

Danny, the leader of the bunch, turns to his three pals.

"Holy shit guys, now's our chance!"

"Yeah!" says Tommy, "Let's get drunk!"

So Tommy threads himself through the pants of the tux in a U shape, forming a nice looking pai...

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