My idea of a balanced diet...

Is a beer in each hand.

My doctor says I'm not eating a balanced diet...that's absurd.

I eat as many cookies with my left hand as I do with my right!

Why did the tiger eat the tightrope walker?

It wanted a balanced diet.

How does Thanos keep in shape?

With a balanced diet.

I precariously stack my chips on top of each other.

Because I like to eat a balanced diet.

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