As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices:

take it or leave it.

I’m on a plane and the lunch choices are white meat chicken or German sausage. Unfortunately, I’m seated in the last row.

I’m hoping for the breast, but preparing for the wurst.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Frank was excited about his new rifle and decided to try bear hunting.....

....He travels up to Alaska, spots a small brown bear and shoots it. Right after, there was a tap on his shoulder and he turned around to see a big black bear. The black bear said, "That was a very bad mistake. That was my cousin and I'm going to give you two choices. Either I maul you to death or w...

So the American people's choices for President will apparently be either Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton.

That is the joke. There's no punchline here.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was 10, a genie gave me two choices: either your dick grows to be massive, or you will have an amazing memory for the rest of your life.

And for the life of me, I can't remember what I chose...

To anyone who works at McDonalds who is feeling bad about their life choices just remember...

You can technically put White House Catering staff on your CV now

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A self-made millionaire decided that he was lonely and needed to find a mate. So, he organized a bit of a competition for it.

As his search neared the end he narrowed the choices down to four.

One was a doctor. She was a surgeon, made incredible money. She was focused and driven. Because she was so wealthy on her own, he knew she wasn't in it only for the money.

One was a lawyer. Again, a successful professio...

A man stumbles upon a magic lamp...

He rubs the lamp and a genie pops out!

The genie says that he will grant the man only one wish, and that he has to pick from three choices. He can either be the richest man in the world, the most popular man in the world, or the wisest man in the world. The man says "We all know that money do...

What’s the best drink to have on the 4th of July?

A White Russian. Nothing is more American then a Russian helping you to make poor choices.

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