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Get it done in one.

Chad is at the gym doing reps with his buddy when he reaches down and grabs his protein drink, gives it one big-hard, strenuous heave of a shake, then gently pops open the lid and takes a swig, sets it down and goes back to his routine.

"What the fuck was that?" asks his buddy.

"Well y...

What are Mexican proteins made of?

Amigo-acids

What does the Mandalorian say when he offers you a protein shake?

This is the whey.

A redhead, brunette and blonde woman are walking aimlessly through an endless desert

The redhead said to the others, "I'm glad we all were smart and brought one item that will help us stay safe if we get lost in the desert. I brought a big canteen of water as mine. If I get thirsty, I'll have that to drink."

The brunette then chimes in and says, "great idea! For my one item, ...

Why was the protein powder maker never satisfied with his work?

He always kept looking for new wheys to improve

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There was a vulture who had a rebellious son.

He would preen his feathers so they stood up, hang out with raccoons, and generally be a nuisance to the rest of the flock. Thinking that it was just a phase, his father didn't worry too much about it and hoped that one day his son would grow up.

However, one day his son came home with terrib...

Some guys wake up and pump iron...

I wake up and pump protein.

Told my wife that this afternoon after getting lucky this morning. I think her eyes rolled into the back of her head.

I'll probably be working out solo for a while.

What do you call a Mexican bodybuilder who’s run out of protein?

No whey Jose.

I was going to buy a load of whey protein powder today.

It's always better to buy it in bulk.

What did the Arab leader drink every day to build muscle mass?

A protein sheikh.

My friend told me about a wonder food that he discovered that contains protein, fiber, and good fats

"That's nuts!" I exclaimed.

A man smokes some weed and goes to buy some protein powder

He gets to the store but realizes that protein powder is super expensive. He decides to steal it, as it was a high whey robbery

A Russian spy meets the minister of defence...

The Russian minister of defence calls Boris Morozov, the best spy in Russia, to infiltrate the American army and find out why they excel so much in combat.

"Understood" says Boris. " I will infiltrate the US army for a year and then I will come back to motherland with findings"

And so...

A guy walks into a coffee shop

He orders a coffee. The barista asks him if he'd like milk or cream. He responds "I'm allergic to the protein in milk." The barista replies "No whey?"

Someone asked me if I wanted a protein bar.

I said no Whey.

Tips while f***ing :

• Keep f***ing periods short

• Stay hydrated

• Stop f***ing if u feel unwell

• Eat enough protein

• Consider **supplements**

• Keep **exercise** mild

• F***ing isn't for everyone


*So remember to follow these tips while Fasting*

What’s the best part about having a vegan girlfriend?

Nuts are her favorite source of protein

What's the other word for meatball?

Protein sphere

The Mexican instructor at the gym knew a lot about protein supplements.

So one day, I approached him and said,

"Jesus, show me the whey."

My friend told me he can’t drink milk. I asked him if he is lactose intolerant. He said he is actually allergic to the milk protein.

I said “No whey!”

What's the difference between a hormone and any other protein?

My fingers can't make any other protein.

My love life is a lot like a protein bar

I'm typically the better option, but everyone chooses junk food instead of me

What do you call protein with attitude?

A mean-o acid.

I was at the grocery store deciding if I should buy a $40 jug of whey protein

So I asked my friend, to which he replied:"Just btw"

What did the weight lifter say after he bought the wrong protein powder?

No whey.

what do you call it when you use milk to make protein drinks?

Milky-Whey.

An aging hotel inspector was performing his final inspection on a luxury hotel before his retirement.

He had arrived at the joint the day before, and had already slept in a room to analyze how clean and comfortable they were. When he had woken up, he went into the bathroom to check its functionality and cleanliness, and continued on to the main dining hall after.

Upon arrival, he saw they we...

This morning I told my wife we were out of protein powder. She replied.....

No Whey

I'll never run out of protein powder

There'd be no whey!

Why is it called a prion?

Because "protein" got misspelled when it was folded the wrong way.

My lifting buddy was shocked when I told him that we were out of protein powder.

He said "No whey!"

I'll be here all night.

I can't believe plant-based protein powder exists

There's no whey

Why was the protein self-conscious?

Because of how much it wheys

Does anyone believe the bodybuilder who claims he never used protein suppliments?

No whey.

My personal trainer told me to drink a protein shake everyday at 3 in the morning.

But that's whey past my bedtime.

[Long] A scientist is giving keynote speech about dissolvable food for babies

"Imagine if we lived in a world where you no longer had to worry about your children eating and getting food stuck in their airways...'

Gasps of amazement come from the crowd

"Imagine if they could still enjoy all of their favourite foods without any danger and don't need to be constan...

A bodybuilder drops his protein shake

Everyone in the gym shouts "Wheyyyyy"

My girlfriend said we should experiment more in the bedroom

This morning we synthesised a new protein chain

Some engineers were arguing about God.

One says, "God was clearly a mechanical engineer. Just look at the structure of the bones, how they're shaped to carry their loads without wasted weight, how the joints interlock to give free movement, how the muscles are optimally placed as actuators with the best leverage."

The second repli...

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Wife calls her scientist husband...

"Honey.. Its Saturday.. you're late..."

"I'm busy with my team in an experiment"

"Whats that?"

"We've just added a derivative of C2H5OH with ambiant temperature H2O and aqueous CO2. To cool this mixture added some super low temperature, solidified H2O, now while waiting for som...

Did you hear about the arabian body builder who built a business empire?

They called him the protein sheikh

TIFU by trying to be witty at the airport...

The TSA confiscated my protein powder asking "Are you planning on building any bombs with this substance?"

I replied "No, only guns."

What do you call a meat knife?

A protein shank.

What's the difference between a slab of meat and someone who hates high school students?

One's protein, the other's anti-teen.

I was going to use the new machine in the gym

But I found out it only sold protein bars

What is a Mexican bodybuilder's favorite supplement?

Güey protein.

Sean Bean is walking down the street

Heard you guys like long OC.

 

Sean Bean is walking down the street, enjoying his Sunday night. Suddenly, a black paneled van pulls up next to him. Four massive dudes in ski masks wearing all black leap out and try to grab him. Sean remembers his GoT training and manages to ta...

Two Mexican body builders

have devoted their lives to power-lifting and they just found out that certain protein supplements have become illegal. Just as one was about to sip on his protein shake, the other smacks it out of his hand and yells: "No whey, Jose!"

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Why do Mexicans eat so many beans?

Because they're versatile, a good value, and contain lots of protein you racist fuck.

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