What do you get when sodium attacks chloride?

A salt

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb?

How many redittors does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers ...

A village was devastated by a lion's multiple attacks on the villagers.

Many hunters attempted to kill the lion but all of them became prey of the lion.

One day a hunter named Killer John (KJ) came to the village claiming that he can kill the lion. The villagers asked what are your going to do that the earlier hunters couldn't do.

KJ asked the help of vill...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Inigo Montoya finally catches up with the six-fingered man in a monastry in Tibet. He finds him red-robed and shaven-headed sweeping the temple courtyard.

"Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." he says, drawing the six-fingered sword

The six-fingered man sighs and lowers his arms "I am prepared, my son. I have been freed from Earthly desires and acheived inner peace. I wish for nothing more than to move on to m...

Why did the Mexican take Xanax?

For Hispanic attacks (please don't hurt me)

What do you call it when a rapper attacks a loved one?

beats by Dr. Dre

"Dj Khaled, what are your thoughts on Palestinian rocket attacks?"

"ANOTHER ONE!!'

Joe the Carpenter

Joe was a simple and serious man. He was a carpenter in a small village named Arge Oaks where he owned the store "Joe's Carpentry."

For years Joe impressed his fellow neighbors with the highest quality carpentry work. Some people in town complained he was a bit too expensive, but no one ever...

Not a joke but a real incident that happened to an indian acquaintance of mine when he moved to Australia for higher studies..

So he comes out of the airport and gets into the cab.

The Aussie cab driver asked where he is from ?

He replied 'India '.

The cab driver asked ' So did you come to die?'

He froze as it was the times when there were racial attacks by white Aussies on people of indian des...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

The parrot and the plumber

A woman who has a pet parrot also has a problem with her plumbing, so she calls a plumber. While she is waiting for him, she decides she needs some items from the store. She thinks she can probably make it to the store and back before the plumber arrives, so off she goes.

Shortly after she ...

Why did the Mexican take Xanax?

Hispanic Attacks

My boyfriend just left me because I have anxiety attacks.

Edit: Nevermind, he just went to the bathroom.

My Grandfather survived Pepper spray and Mustard gas attacks in two wars..

..and came to us a seasoned Veteran.

Why can I not make jokes about the recent attacks in France?

Because jokes are all about execution.

What kind of computer virus attacks kids

A PDF file

Why did the Mexican go to the Emergency Room (ER)?

Because of Hispanic attacks

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

By tightly securing our Nuclear Arsenal through human, digital, mechanical and chemical means, we've been able to almost completely eliminate the risk of nuclear warhead explosions due to accidents or hostile attacks, however if these past four years have taught us something ...

... it's that we also need to equip our nukes with child locks.

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