Three men were about to be executed by the firing squad.

The first man was brought forward and before they could shoot him he yelled "avalanche"! The firing squad panicked and in the confusion, the man jumped over the wall and into freedom before the firing squad could regroup.

The second man thought what the first man did was clever and when he wa...

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are arrested and sentenced to death by firing squad, one by one.

While they wait to be executed they come up with a plan.

Right before they’re about to be shot, each one will yell that some natural disaster or emergency is happening to distract the soldiers. During the distraction, they would be able to escape.

The brunette is first. As she hears ...

A man was arrested for firing a gun into a kitchen.

First he took a potshot then he got a mugshot.

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Unexpectedly, an artist's wife started having sex with him every day.

Though quite unusual, he didn't question his luck, deciding to just enjoy the ride.

One day, his wife approached him. "Honey? Can you sketch a picture for me?"

"Of course!" he replied. "What should I draw?"

"What you think our baby will look like."

He stared back at her,...

As I saw Tom Cruise firing bullets at an innocent crowd, I immediately made a wish.

It was after all a Shooting Star!

A shooting club was holding a competition. The winner was to get a somewhat ugly trophy, the second-placed shooter - a crate of champagne.

By the end of the final round, two shooters were tied for first place, so they were told to do a tiebreaker round - 5 shots at maximum distance. To keep things more dramatic, they had to shoot at the same time.

After both had stopped firing and were awaiting the results, one shooter turned to...

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The Firing Squad

Four gunmen are standing in the woods, recently deputized by the new regime in the budding of a civil war. Before them, a gagged and hooded prisoner on their knees, sobbing at the edge of an empty grave. Behind them, nine already filled.

The first looks nervous. "I've been counting the prison...

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Me: You're firing me?

**Boss:** We have reason to believe you're using work computers to run some butt pic website. Bootypedia or something.

**Me:** First off I would never do that. Second, it's called Wikicheeks.

A Blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead are against a wall to be executed by a firing line.

Each is given an opportunity for last words. The Redhead is up first: she points and screams "Tornado!" Everyone freaks out and in the commotion she gets away. The Brunette is second and catches on the the plan: she points and screams "Tsunami," fleeing in the confusion. The Blonde has worked out a ...

A condemned man is brought before the firing squad by the executioner...

Before his death sentence is carried out, the executioner tells him “As is customary, you are permitted a ceremonial final cigarette.”

“No, thanks,” says the condemned man. “I’m trying to quit.”

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