Criticise Jokes - 13 Hilarious Criticise Jokes

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What is a profession that begins with “P”, is often criticised, and is known for fucking people and taking their money?

Politician.

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"Don't criticise what you can't understand." - Bob Dylan

I fucking hate that quote.

What does it even mean?!

To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticise.

We need to rise up against children with leukaemia

I think it's a bit harsh to criticise Trump for trying to ban the export of masks

He's just following medical advice and trying to keep 3M away from everyone else

Someone told me that before you criticise someone walk a mile in their shoes...

And now I'm a mile away, my feet hurt because I've been walking in shoes that are too small for me, I have to try and get my own shoes back and I can't even criticise them because everyone thinks I'm just some weirdo that steals shoes.

Last time I'm doing that

In China, you can criticise every Roman numeral from I to X.

But you can't criticize Xi.

A gun company has been criticised after bringing out a pistol covered in Lego

The manufacturer says it's perfectly safe, unless you step on it in bare feet.

Did you hear about the Judge that criticised Putin?

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Before criticising someone, walk a mile in their shoes.

That way, once you criticise them , you're a mile away and have new shoes

Some people criticise America's current leadership, others say it can do no wrong, but there's one thing everyone can agree on.

Under the last administration, America really was an Obama-nation.

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I heard that R Kelly criticised Justin Bieber's music.

He pissed off a lot of little girls.

Three men were sitting in a prison cell in Moscow in 1937

They talked about what they had been arrested for

"I praised comrade Petrov" said the second.

"I criticised comrade Petrov" said the first man.

"I *am* comrade Petrov" said the third.

Three Russians are in a gulag...

The first man asks the second, "So, why are you here?"

The second man replies, "I'm here because I criticised the former Premier"

The first man is confused and says, "that's strange; I'm here because I spoke out in *favour* of the former Premier"

They then turn to the third man ...

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