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America's Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The director of one of America's finest hospitals is showing the President around the hospital.

In one room, the President sees a male patient masturbating furiously. "What's that guy doing?" he asks.

"He has a very rare condition," responds the director. "He produces semen way too quickly. If he doesn't masturbate at least thrice a day, his testicles will explode."

In the next r...

Sometimes I feel like America's infrastructure

Excessively damaged due to bad choices made decades ago and a lack of routine maintenance.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

China's economy is like America's pornography.

Cacheless.

I have never cared for talent shows like America's Got Talent, Britain's Got Talent, etc.

I think its all staged.

Imagine America's best dentists competing against each other in fixing dental problems

We'll call the show "Top Gum"

Do you think America's gone nuts?

Nah. They've gone coup coup.

I watched an episode of America's Most Wanted last night that scared me so bad I'm afraid to even go outside now.

I'm afraid someone is going to recognize me.

An airplane was about to crash. There were 4 passengers on board but only 3 parachutes.

The 1st passenger said, " I am Steph Curry , the best NBA basketball player. The warriors and my millions of fans need me , and i can't afford to die" So he took the 1st pack and left the plane

The 2nd passenger , Donald Trump , said , " I am the newly elected US President , and I am the smar...

Whats Captain America's shield made out of?

Vibrainian

What's Hawkeye's shield made out of?

Quicksilver

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In honor of America's upcoming Independence Day, do you know why America spells "behavior", "color", and "humor" the way they do?

Because **fuck u**, that's why!

If Bill Cosby is America's dad...

Does that make him Canada's creepy uncle?

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