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Two communists are sitting together at a nudist colony.

One turns to the other and asks “Have you read Marx?” The second replies “yes, it’s these damn wicker chairs!”

A hole was found in the local nudist colony’s wall

Police are looking into it.

Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony?

The one who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand and a dozen doughnuts

THIS JUST IN: It's been reported that somebody made a hole in the fence surrounding the nudist colony.

Police are looking into it .

Did you hear about that colony that got destroyed by the tornadoes?

It was very unsettling.

So I heard there's a group of optometrists who founded a colony on an archipelago off the coast of Alaska, but the islands themselves are very weird to look at.

They're called the Optical Aleutians.

I recently joined a nudist colony..

The first week was the hardest

An old man decides to look into a Nudist Colony

He is invited to try the one week trial period so he does.

On his first day he took off his clothes and started to wander around the area. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by, and the man immediately gets an erection.

The woman notices his erection, walks over to him and asks, "did you ...

If Elon Musk's space company establishes a Mars colony, and you have a girlfriend on mars, but later break up because of long distance,

she'd be your....
Space x.

The discriminatory ant colony banished all ants over 4 mm tall

They had no taller ants

Whenever an ant gets injured, instead of helping, the rest of the colony just leaves it to die. It’s like the old saying goes:

If an ant broke, dont fix it

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the most popular movie at a nudist colony?

Free Willy


I'm happy with thinking of this myself.

Who is the moat popular guy in a nudist colony?

The one who can hold 12 doughnuts without any hands.

Who is the most popular woman?

The one who can eat the last doughnut

How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?

Well, it's not hard.

Growing up in a colony, the nuns told me to never turn your back on a priest.

I mean, there's a reason why they became missionaries.

Last week, I discovered a colony of black ants in my kitchen.

They live in a crack in my kitchen wall.

This kitchen is in the apartment flat I'm renting by myself.

I've counted a total of seven ants crawling out of the crack, and there's presumably one queen inside too.

I know there's a queen because just yesterday, one male ant was gone, ...

I think the local nudist colony just went out of business.

The sign on their gate says:
"Clothed Until Further Notice."

My friend asked me if I was ready to go to the nudist colony.

I was born ready.

Social distancing at a nudist colony

Is directly influenced by the tempture.
Warm days, 6'3"
Cold days less

I went to an all you can eat restaurant at a nudist colony in Canada

It was called In the Buffet

Revenge of the penguins

There is this large group of penguins living their peaceful, penguin lives.

One day, a ship crashes and sinks nearby. A polar bear swims to the ice from the sinking ship and quickly falls asleep, obviously exhausted from his ordeal.

The penguins, having never seen a polar bear, th...

"We Do Not Have A Child Slave Colony On Mars."

They are free to leave the dome whenever they wish.

I saw a small colony of ants

So, I was in my room and I saw a group of 10 ants just running frantically. I felt bad, so I made a small house for them out of a cardboard box.
This technically makes me their landlord and they are my...



Tenants.

A man was recruited for a space colony

He had been posted to a planet 14 lightyears from Sol. As his ship landed on the planet's glowing surface, he saw a car waiting for him.

"Welcome to Anti-Earth," The driver said, "don't worry we are going to change the name soon. I am here to take you to your quarters and show you the colony ...

I used to know a girl from a nudist colony

Man, I tell you, nothing looked good on her!

Why was the Amish woman kicked out of her colony?

She slept with two Mennonite.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A 60-year-old man goes to a nudist colony for a month. [NSFW]

He walks in and goes to the reception, hands in his clothes and the worker shows him his room.

Not long after there is a gorgeous woman at the door, and he immediately gets an erection.

The woman asks "are you calling for me".

The man says "no, no of course not".

The woma...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old man checks out the local Nudist Colony to see if he wants to join

The clerk invites him to take a nude, self tour. He agrees and proceeds to go for his tour, completely naked, sporting only his cigar... not five minutes into his stroll he sees a beautifully shaped young lady in the buff which aroused him quickly... the young lady, noticing his erection decides to...

What do you call the ant that keeps track of all the food in a colony?

A count Ant

My lazy neighbor is retiring and joining a nudist colony...

...he said he just wanted a place where he could hang out.

A man moves into a nudist colony.

He receives a letter from his mother asking him to send her a current photo of himself in his new location. Too embarrassed to let her know that he lives in a nudist colony, he cuts a photo in half and sends her the top part. Later he receives another letter asking him to send a
picture to his gr...

I was constantly praised and flattered by a colony of ants....

It turns out that they were sycophants!

An ant colony enthusiast goes to a convention

His pride and joy is a colony of giant Amazonian ants, *Dinoponera gigantea,* which he brings along with him to present. But when he gets to the door of the convention hall, he's stopped by one of the organizers, who points to a sign on the wall. It says "all ants must not be more than 1 cm in total...

The nudist colony restaurant was so bad

Even the salad was undressed

A bunch of insects are having a formal get together and decide to invite a simple drone worker whose sole function is to carry whatever the queen wants back to the colony...

Becoming all excited at the prospect of doing something different he decides to dress himself in the best suit there is but he cannot seem to complete the look with a half-windsor knot.

Such a complicated task required more skilled mandibles so he goes over to his boss but suddenly gets crush...

Welcome to the 23rd annual Leper Colony marathon! We now go down to our racers at the start of the first leg.

Aaaaaand they're off!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If your monarch is a dick

You are a member of a penile colony

Strong bed (not original - translated)

Man to carpenter - make a very strong bed so it does not break as my son will sleep with my daughter in law on it after marriage
Carpenter - don't worry sir I will make such strong bed it will not break even if whole colony sleeps with your daughter in law

Why did the dwarf get kicked out of the nudist colony?

He kept sticking his nose in everyone’s business

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The nudest colony. NSFW. Long.

A man retired after over 30 years working for the Postal Service.

He decided that he was going to fulfill his lifelong desire to join a nudist colony.

After some research he found a nude beach that fit all of his criteria. On one beautiful Saturday he decided to go and visit. He arrive...

What do you call the ant in the colony who trades with other ant colonies for resources?

Import-ant

I sometimes do stand-up comedy for a leper colony.

My jokes have them all cracking up.

Farmer John

Farmer John once lived on a quiet rural highway but as time
went by, the traffic slowly built up and eventually got so
heavy and so fast that his free range chickens were being
run over, at a rate of three to six a week.
So Farmer John called the local police station to complain,
"You...

What do you call it when rodents invade a beaver colony?

Hamsterdam

I was trying to get over my fear of public speaking at a nudist colony.

I just imagined everyone with their clothes on.

Two friends are arguing...

"Look, I have a colony of ants!"

"Well, I have taller ants than you"

"Oh, well I have a tube of glue"

"Hah, I have an entire tin"

"I got bread!"

"Argh, you win! I can't handle that bread with my glue tin 'n' taller ants"

How do you spot Ronald McDonald at a nudist colony?

He's the one with the sesame seed buns.

What happens to a bacteria when he travels from his home colony to another?

He experiences culture shock.

A mother ant and her daughter were out for a walk in their underground city.

They were having a lovely day until they came upon a group of protesters outside the queen's domain. One, with a sign reading *It's time to GO!,* spotted them and quickly approached.

"Excuse me ma'am, can you spare a moment to take a look at some alarming literature and help support our cause...

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