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Trainers Jokes

I don't think I'm strong enough anymore for my job as a personal trainer

So I guess I'll hand in my too weak notice

To the person who stole my trainers and hi-viz jacket...

You can run, but you can't hide.

Two tricks personal trainers don’t want you to know

If you’re bulking: Drink coke

If you’re cutting: Snort coke

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Favorite porn genre of physical trainers?

Step-Aerobics

How many trainers will it take to teach Tommy fashion design?

None. Hilfiger it out.

I just bought a pair of trainers from a drug dealer...

I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I have a special set of trainers that always seem to give me a sore throat whenever I wear them.

They're my hoarse shoes.

Nike have unveiled a pair of trainers made from pineapple leather to appeal to Vegans...

They tried other fruits, but reviews said the ones made from bananas felt too much like slippers.

My friend really enjoys stealing trainers.

That's what he does for kicks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Canadian, an American and a Mexican were tasked by a billionaire with teaching his stubborn pet parrot how to speak within 2 weeks.

They were given everything they needed to succeed and a large sum of money was offered to the one who made the parrot talk first.

The Canadian played documentaries for the parrot through the whole duration, he spent all his time citing the alphabet and reading stories for the parrot.

T...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the difference between a bunch of bugs and Dwayne Johnson’s personal trainers?

One is a group of cockroaches, the other’s a bunch of Rock coaches

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

On no account should you buy trainers when you’re fully aware they were made by children in Indonesia.

I bought a pair yesterday and the stitching’s fucking atrocious.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A teenager was stabbed to death in a shopping mall over a stolen pair of trainers.

Those security guards don't fuck about.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy starts his first day working at walmart

A boy starts his first day at walmart.
His trainer says to him " I'll take care of the first 2 customers to show you how it's done and you can look after the 3rd"
So the trainer goes to the first customer and says " can I help you mam?"
Lady goes "Ya I'm looking for some garden hose."
T...

I went on a date with a blind girl last night

and it went so well that she paid for the meal, the drinks and even bought me a new TV and a pair of trainers online.

She'll be livid when she finds out.

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