Did you see Mike Pence left the Colts game because the players knelt for the national anthem?

He was quoted as saying "I won't stand for this" on the way out

Donald Trump was carrying a Colt 45

When asked why, he said it's just for shooting cans.... Africans Mexicans and Puerto Ricans

A Colt 1911 and a Glock walks into a bar...

The 1911 says to the Glock: "Hey, ugly foreigner, want to do a drinking contest?"

The Glock says "You old idiot, you can only last 8 rounds!"

From a friend of mine who's a gun enthusiast.

One the best jokes I've heard in a while

A guy walked into a crowed bar waving his 1912 colt 45 caliber pistol with a 8 round magazine, and he yelled, who in here has been screwing my wife?

A voice from the back of the bar yelled back, you Need more bullets!!!!

A Firefighter, a Sheriff, and a Paramedic are trying to get into heaven...

St. Peter greets them and tells them regardless of their heroic acts, they'll need to be able to count to ten to get into heaven.

The Sheriff goes first. He hauls out his Colt .45 and counts the shots, "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7... Let me try again!" So he reloads, "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7... Nope, I...

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An old cowboy sat down at the Starbucks and ordered a cup of coffee.

As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman sat down next to him.

She turned to the cowboy and asked, 'Are you a real cowboy?' He replied, 'Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my b...

My friend was in an old movie about guns

It is now a Colt Classic

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Is it the first line or the punchline that goes here?

In the days of the wild west, there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the fastest gunfighter in the world.

He practiced every minute of his spare time, but he knew that he wasn't yet first-rate and that there must be something he was doing wrong.

Sitting in a saloo...

What is a paranormal inestigator's favorite type of gun?

A colt.

A classic

Judge "I see by your filing sir that you are suing the defendant for damages and injuries received when his cattle truck ran a red light and broadsided your car, now the damages I can understand but the defendant has provided a police report that says you claimed to be uninjured at the scene, why ar...

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A young state trooper pulls over an old lady on a rural road

A young state trooper pulls over an old lady for speeding on a rural stretch of highway. After he approaches the car he asks her:
"License and registration please ma'am."

She responds with: "That's fine officer, but I have to tell you, I do keep a gun in my glove box with my information."<...

A cop pulls over a woman

The officer comes to the window of the car and asks the woman "Mam, do you have any weapons in the car?"

The woman replies "Well, I have a 12 gauge in the trunk, a smith and wesen in the glove compartment, a colt on my side, and a derenger strapped to my boot."

The officer says "My g...

A man goes to a movie theater

As he is walking up to buy his ticket, he notices that security is going through peoples bags. At the sight of this, he begins to sweat a little.

He buys his ticket, and tries to walk inside without being seen. Right when he thought he had made it through, a security guard caught him and aske...

Cop pulls a man over and the man hands him a concealed carry permit....

So the cop asked the man "are you carrying today sir?"
Man says "yes sir, I have a Colt .45 on my hip and a .22 in my boot."
"Anything else?" Said the officer. Man says "well there's a Glock in the glove box, a 12 gauge on the back seat... oh plus the M4, Springfield and Tommy gun in the trunk...

Seven Horse Jokes

Q Why was the young horse confused?

A He wasn't foal-ly aware of what was going on.

Q Why wouldn't that horse want to date the other horse?

A He didn't want to be a-filly-ated with her

Q Why did the horse need cough syrup?

A It caught a colt.

Q What was the ...

A cop pulls over an old lady for speeding...

..."Afternoon ma'am. May I see your license and registration?" The old lady wordlessly hands the officer these items. As the officer reaches for the papers, he takes observation of the old woman.

She wasn't just old, she was very old. Must have been in her mid 90's. The fact that she was spee...

Once upon a time, two race horses were born...

This is long, but worth it.

Their names were Herman and Berman and they were twins. Herman was born just slightly before Berman. Herman and Berman were colts of average work horses and were to work the fields everyday. One day Herman and Berman decide to have a race. Everyday at noon, the lu...

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A kid is riding on the school bus...

A kid is riding on the school bus, and is in the seat right behind the bus driver. He says "If my mommy was a hen and my daddy was a rooster I would be a little chick." "If my mommy was a mare and my daddy was a colt I would be a little foal." The kid continues with every other animal he knows, and ...

Grandmother's Pistol

My grandmother got pulled over for speeding. She rolled down her window and talked to the cop. He asked for her registration, and she said,
"Sure, i'll give it to you, but i want to warn you, I've got a Colt 45 in the glovebox."
As he reviewed her licence and reg, the cop asked her about any o...

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another farm joke

On a farm there is an old horse and a young horse. Every week for entertainment, the farmer races the horses against each other. At first the full grown horse wins consistently, but lately the young horse has won more and more. After a particularly bad defeat, the old horse over hears the farmer say...