UPJOKE
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Some girl

Some girl asked me if she was wearing too much make up.

I told her it depends on if she was trying to kill batman.

Some girls play hard to get

Well, not me,
I play hard to want.

Some girls like bukkake

Let’s face it

Some girls at my gym were saying I was related to Bruce Lee.

I had to politely let them know I wasn’t, and my name isn’t Ugg, either.

I slept with a girl who works at Netflix last night

It was pretty cool, she even recommended some girls I might like to sleep with next

Why are some girls so odd?

Because they can't even.

There was a poetry competition final with two contestants, a university student and an old country man.

They each had 20 seconds to come up with a poem about Timbuktu.

The student goes first and says " Across the desert sands, crossed a lonely caravan, men on camels two by two, destination Timbuktu."

The crowd goes wild cheering for the poem.

The old country man then goes, "Tim...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some girls at the office start talking about their tattoos...

...John the manager walks by and one of them asks: "Hey John, do you have any tattoos?" John lets out a sigh "I wouldn't be allowed to show it at the office" and walks away.

Fast forward to Friday night and John takes everyone out to the bar for a round of drinks. Everyone is drinking hav...

I went to the bar to pick up some girls

They were pretty heavy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some girls find guys that work on cars sexy

My car wouldn't start, so today I had to use a torx-20 to remove my automatic idle controller and use mass air flow cleaner to wipe the buildup. Does that get your engine revving? Cuz it got mine going.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Today I walked up to some girls and asked if they liked guys with big dicks

They replied yeah.

I replied, "I'm sorry for wasting your time..." turned around and walked away awkwardly.

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