Bought a Christmas tree today. The salesman asked if I was going to put it up myself.

I said no, in my living room

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A traveling salesman knocks on a door and a little boy answers.

The boy is wearing a women’s nightgown, drinking brandy from a snifter, and smoking a joint.

Stunned, the salesman says, ‘excuse me, are your parents home?’

The little boy replies,
‘What the fuck do you think?’

[At auto store] Salesman: How can we get you to walk out of here with 4 brand new tires?

Me: Sir, you are really overestimating my strength.

What do you call an introverted salesman?

Poor.

A salesman drove into a small town where a circus was playing.

A sign read: "Don't Miss "The Amazing Italian".
The salesman bought a ticket and sat down. There, Under The Big Top, in the Centre ring, was a table with three walnuts on it. Standing next to it was an old Italian.

Suddenly, the old man dropped his pants, whipped out his huge male member...

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What's the difference between an oyster salesman with tourettes, and a prostitute with diarrhea?

Well, one shucks between fits...

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A salesman is peddling his goods from door to door in a massive high-rise building.

He knocks at a young man’s apartment and asks him, “Would you like to buy a top-of-the-line toothbrush? It’s only ten dollars.”

“Ten bucks for a toothbrush!” the man yells. “What moron would pay ten dollars for a toothbrush? You’re out of your mind.”

“All right then,” the salesman cont...

I didn't want to take advice from a sword salesman at the carnival...

...but he made some fair points.

What's the difference between a used car salesman and a computer salesman?

A used car salesman knows when he's lying.

A bible salesman won top sales award

But people are confused because he is famously known for being so timid that when he speaks, he stutters. So when the award was announced and the salesman is invited to the stage, everybody wants to hear what this man says.

After handshaking the announcer, the man hesitantly approach the micr...

Cardi B has a son and he’s a car salesman

His name was Cardi Laship

A farmer walks into a hardware store and asks for a chainsaw that can cut down 6 trees in one hour. The salesman recommends the top of the line model. The farmer is suitably impressed, and buys it.

The next day he brings it back, complaining that it would only cut down 1 tree and it took ALL DAY! The salesman takes the chain saw, starts it up to see what’s wrong, and the farmer says: “What’s that noise?”

A salesman gets a flat tire in front of the insane asylum.

As he changes the tire a guy on the other side of the fence sits watching him.
In the process of changing the tire the salesman kicks the nuts holding the wheel and loses the nuts in a the stream next to the road.
Raging about and cursing his luck he's interrupted by the guy on the other sid...

What do you call a door to door bicycle salesman?

A Peddler

A salesman told me to buy a different deer hunting rifle

He told me it was a better bang for your buck

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A man playing on a new golf course got confused as to what hole he was on.

He saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her and asked if she knew what hole he was playing.

She replied, “I’m on the 7th hole, and you’re a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole.”

He thanked her and went back to his golf.

On the back nine, the same thing hap...

A door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesman knocks on a woman's door.

The woman answers, and the salesman says "Lady, I have the best damn vaccuum cleaner in the whole world."

Before she could decline, he invited himself in. "Lady," he said, "This vaccuum cleaner can suck up anything. In fact, if you leave it running, it'll probably suck the carpet up!"

...

A salesman rings the doorbell.

An eight year old boy answers the door. He is naked, except for his father's hat, his mother's panties, and a cape. He has a martini glass in one hand and a fat, Cuban cigar in the other.

"A-a-are your parents home?", the man stutters.

"What the Hell do you think?"

[First Day as Car Salesman]

Customer: Cargo space?

Me: Car no do that, car no fly.

Manager: Can I see you in my office?

My first job was as a door-to-door salesman.

I sold "no soliciting" signs.

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.

"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

The blonde was very angry about this. She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."

"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.

The blonde did not know how the sale...

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The new employee.

This guy just started at his new job, working at an adult shop. His boss comes out and tells him that he has to leave for a while, and "can you handle it? "

The new employee is somewhat reluctant, but with the boss's positive comments he finally agrees.

So, the guy is there by himself ...

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A vacuum cleaner salesman

A vacuum cleaner salesman knocked on my door
Before I spoke he tipped a bucket of dog shit over my carpet and said
If this vacuum doesn't remove every trace of it I'll personally eat what's left
I replied I hope you're hungry because they cut off my electric this morning

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Headache & testicles

Joe had suffered from really bad headaches for the last 20 years.

He eventually decides to go and see a Doctor.

The Doctor says, 'Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches.

The bad news is that it will require removing your testicles.

You have a very rare condition...

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The Salesman

A keen country lad applied for a salesman's job at a city department store. In fact it was the biggest store in the world - you could get anything there.

The boss asked him, "Have you ever been a salesman before?"

"Yes, I was a salesman in the country" said the lad.

The boss lik...

I would love to be a microscope salesman..

"I'm sorry, sir, but I'm not looking to buy a microscope"
"OK then, here's my business card"
"The writing is way too small! I can't read it!"
"Well, do I have a product for you!"

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Four men went golfing together one day...

Three headed to the first tee and one went into the club house to take care of the bill.

The three men started talking, bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder and he's so successful that he gave a friend a new home - for free."

The second ma...

A traveling salesman knocked on the door of a farmhouse..

And since it was getting late, he asked the farmer if he could sleep in the barn that night. The farmer said, "That would be fine, but you have to promise to leave my son alone." And the salesman said, Oh no! I'm in the wrong joke!"

A travelling salesman walks into a bar...

He’s going over the menu when a local guy slides onto the stool next to him, and just says one word: “Waterloo.”

Guessing he’s onto something of a local speciality, he asks for one himself. He takes a deep swig and pulls a face: “This doesn’t taste like anything at all!!!” he exclaims.
...

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A door-to-door salesman knocks on a door of a house

Little Johnny opens up, holding a half empty bottle of whisky and a lit cigar.

The salesman says, "hey kid, are your mom and dad home?"

Johnny takes a swig of whisky and a puff of the cigar, and answers, "What the fuck do you think"?

A traveling salesman calls home...

His eldest son answers the phone. He asks his son how everyone is doing, son tells him everyone is fine, but the cat died. The salesman is heartbroken. He tells his son that he needs to break things like this more delicately. The son asks how.
The salesman tells him to be more delicate. First yo...

I met a rock salesman once.

He really took his money for granite.

I asked the book salesman if he had any book about kleptomania.

He kicked me out.

A salesman position

(English is not my mother language so ignore any grammatical mistakes) :)

A guy is interviewed for a salesman position, the interviewer asks the guy to take his laptop saying "let's see if you can convince me to buy this laptop, I want you to walk in again thinking of me as a customer."...

Did you hear about the battery salesman?

He charged too much but got positive reviews.

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One of my dads favorite jokes....

A young man from Texas moves to California and goes to one of those big "everything under one roof" stores looking for a job. The manager asked, "Do you have any sales experience?"

The kid said, "Sure, I was a salesman back home in San Antonio."

The boss liked the kid so he gave him th...

What's a good name for an insurance salesman?

Justin Case

The salesman

A man came into a shop with a 'Salesman Wanted' sign in a window. He went up to the owner and said, "I-I-I w-w-waannn-t the j- joooob-b."

"I don't know if this job would suit you because of your speaking impediment ," said the owner.

"I h-h-havvve a w-wi-wiiiife and s-s-s-six k- kkkid...

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The Traveling Salesman

A traveling salesman is going door to door in a small town. After having the door slammed in his face multiple times he decides to knock on one last door. The door is answered by a 10 year old boy wearing lingerie, high heels, lipstick and smoking a cigarette.

Salesman (shocked) : Young man a...

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The Tractor Salesman

There's a farmer and he's chilling on his stoep watching the cows and the tractor salesman shows up.



The farmer says "I have six tractors already. One of them hardly gets used. I think I have enough tractors."



The tractor salesman says "This is the only tractor you'll...

An Arabic man is helplessly wandering through the desert when he comes across a Jewish tie salesman.

"Water! Water!" The Arabic man cries.

"I have no water, only ties. Would you like to purchase a tie?" Replies the Jewish tie salesman.

"No!" Exclaims the Arabic man, "I need water! Tell me where there's water!"

"I know where there is water. 20 miles east, there is a village w...

A traveling salesman was driving on a lonely country road on his way home one night when a huge storm came up. He saw farmhouse up the road and headed for it. He knocked on the door and the farmer answered. The salesman asked if he could take shelter from the storm at his house.

The farmer welcomed him in and put him up for the night. In the morning, the kind farmer served him bacon and eggs and the salesman was extremely thankful for his hospitality On his way out, the farmer walked him to his car and the salesman saw a pig with 3 legs go past. The salesman asked why does...

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Sunnyvale Farms - PEACHES ANY FLAVOR (long)

A traveling salesman was driving into a new town and prospect, when he passes a sign that says “ Sunnyvale Farms! Peaches, any flavor”. Upon reading the sign, he thinks to himself “These rednecks are some seriously dumb folks. A peach is a peach! What’s that “any flavor” BS about?

So, over th...

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Why do girls in porn slap their vaginas like used - car salesman?

"You can fit so much dick in this bad boy."

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A farmer is at the bar complaining about a pushy fertilizer salesman.

There's only so much bullshit a guy can take.

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A vacuum cleaner salesman knocks on a woman's door. As she opens the door the salesman quickly runs inside and empties a bag full of poop on her expensive carpet.

Woman, shocked and angered, shouts "what the hell are you doing to my carpet?!?". The salesman replies "Ma'am, this is not just any ordinary vacuum cleaner. This vacuum cleaner has been engineered by top German scientists in their super high tech labs. If this vacuum cleaner doesn't clean up your ca...

A salesman was traveling across the country when...

...his car started making a funny sounds. He knew he needed to take it to a mechanic but knowing nothing about cars he was afraid of getting screwed.

So he came up with a plan. He stopped at the nearest gas station/shop and told the old mechanic "Now listen here bud, I'm a mechanic so I'll kn...

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A man goes into a brothel

He says to the madam, "Hi, I'm a traveling salesman, I've been on the road for eight weeks. I'll pay $100 for the worst blow-job in the house."

She says, "The worst...? For $100 you can have the best blow-job in the house!"

He says, "No, it's all right, I'm not horny, I'm homesick."

I had an interview for a position as a car salesman.

The interviewer handed me his laptop and said, “Here, sell this to me.”
I took the laptop and stuck it in my bag and left. Three hours later he called and asked for his laptop back. I said, “You want to buy it back?”

So there's this salesman..

He's driving down the road, not in any particular hurry. As he's driving, he happens to looks down and sees a chicken running alongside the car. He takes a closer look, and sees it has three legs.

The salesman eases onto the gas. 45, 50 miles per hour; chicken's right there. He gives it a bit...

A snail crawls into a Tesla dealership...

A salesman asks how he can help. The snail says, "I want a Model S."

The salesman scoffs and says, "You're a *snail.* Why would you want a Tesla Model S?"

The snail sadly replies, "Nobody ever pays attention or even notices me. I can't seem to make friends or meet girls. I figure i...

Why was the weed salesman so good at business in mecca

Because he got his profits high

What did the blubber salesman say when he found out the margins on petroleum were better?

Whale oil be damned!

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A salesman walks into a dentists office

The salesman wanted a job selling toothbrushes and claimed he could sell 100 toothbrushes in one day. So the dentist gave him 100 toothbrushes and the salesman came back the next day with all the money. The dentist said “Wow, you sold all 100 toothbrushes in one day? How did you do it?”
The sale...

A salesman enters the porch and knocks on the farmhouse door...

... Little Timmy answers the door by sliding it slowly open, inspecting the salesman standing tall with his briefcase.

- hello there kiddo, may I speak to your father? The man asked little Timmy.

Timmy swiftly replies before cleaning his running nose with his sleeve. "sorry my dad got...

A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but didn't want to spend a lot of money.

“How much do they cost?" he asked the salesman.

"They range from $2 to $2,000."

"Can I see the $2 model?" said the customer.

The salesman put a large device around the
man's neck, and said: "You just stick this red tube in your ear and run this cable down into your pocket." ...

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A salesman has to travel to Pittsburg for work...

When he gets to the ticket line at the airport, he is caught by how beautiful, and voluptuous, the desk clerk is.
She asks “can I help you?”
And he stammers out “one picket to titsburg please!”
Embarrassed, he apologizes, corrects himself, and gets his ticket.
For the next three days he’...

Are you a big rig salesman?

Cause you gave me a semi.

I told a salesman I desperately needed a new TV.

"Do you plan on mounting it?" he asked.

"No," I said. "I'm not *that* desperate."

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Old joke slightly different. An old peach salesman drives up to a house and knocks...

- Beautiful lady answers door with not much on. Asks old man what she can for you

- old man asks if she’d like to buy some peaches

- she says, I don’t know, takes his hand and puts it on her breast. Asks “Are your peaches as firm and nice as this.”

- he says, “yes ma’am”...

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The Toothbrush Salesman.

One day, a man with a lisp named Joseph walks into a toothbrush factory. Down on his luck and very desperate, he asks to speak to the manager of the facility, about getting a job as a toothbrush salesman. The manager walks out, and greets Joseph. “Hi there thir, my names Jotheph, and I was curiouth ...

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Door to door salesman is making his rounds

When he walks up the steps to Little Johnny's house.

Little Johnny answers the door, 8 years old, wearing nothing but his mom's lingerie, smoking a cigar and sipping a glass of bourbon.

"Excuse me young man, are your parents home?" Asks the salesman.

Johnny looks up and says "...

Why was the clock salesman bored?

He had too much time on his hands.

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Life of a salesman

So a department store famous for carrying everything is looking to hire a new sales associate. They have narrowed it down to two candidates. They decide to do a trial run and give them each a week to see who earns the highest commission to see who gets the job.

The first guy comes in every d...

A Chinese man is buying a car

The salesman approaches him and starts asking questions about what they were looking for

After some questioning the car salesman says
"Cargo Space?"

The Chinese man replied "Car no go space! Car stay on ground"

A stutterer applies for a job selling Bibles.

The boss is wary, but they're short on salesmen and he is willing to give it a shot.

On his first day, the new salesman comes in during lunch. "C-c-can I g-get some n-n-new B-Bibles, I'm out of st-t-stock," he says.

The boss is flabbergasted. "How on Earth did you manage that?" he as...

My grandad lost his job after the war as a coleman's mustard powder salesman.

His boss told him to mix it with other cheaper powders like flour and chalk but grandad was an honest man, and would only ever sell genuine 100% pure stuff.

His boss fired him as he plainly didn't cut the mustard

I picked out a color of grey paint the other day, I guess the salesman didn't like it.

He just said "Oh, the hue manatee."

A salesman telephoned a household

and a four-year-old answered.


Salesman: May I speak to your mother?


Child: She's not here.


Salesman: Well, is anyone else there?


Child: My sister


Salesman: O.K., fine. May I speak to her?


Child: I guess so.


Th...

The Vacuum Salesman

A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleane...

Car salesman: * slaps roof on r/jokes *

This baby can fit so many damn reposts in it!

Did you hear about the lady who fell in love with a ginger ale salesman? [original!]

She was Schwepped off her feet

Circa 1994: A blonde walks into an appliance store and says to the salesman.

"excuse me sir, I would like to buy that television over there"

"Sorry ma'am we don't sell to blondes" the salesman replies

Appalled the blonde scoffs and storms out the door

She comes back with a red wig on and tries again only to have the man tell her

"Sorry ma'am we...

Why can't you trust r/AntiJokes as a Car salesman?

They lie about the wheels.

What do you call a dog working as a door salesman?

A labour-a-door

I've always wanted to be a mirror salesman

It's just something I could see myself doing

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A salesman is being trained on his first day at Walmart

A salesman is being trained on his first day at Walmart, and his mentor is teaching him how to upsell. A customer walks in and asks where he can find a new blade for his lawnmower. The mentor says, “No one sells that kind of blade anymore so you might as well buy a new lawnmower, but fortunately w...

I went pillow shopping the other day but I left angry [OC]

The salesman wouldn’t stop talking down to me.

Grandpa and Grandma are sitting on a bench in the park

they hear the jingle of the icecream salesman.

Grandma says : "I'd like some vanilla icecream."

Grandpa says: "Good idea, I'd also like some chocolate icecream".

Grandma stands up and says: "I'll go get some."

"You should write it, Grandma, you know your memory is not wha...

What did the Witch say when the Broom Salesman showed her a Vacuum?

I don't want an automatic! I want a Stickshift!

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Just heard this joke from my dad: A newly hired salesman in a department store is being taught by his manager how to handle sales...

The manager tells him that he'll help the first customer, and show him how to make the most of a sales opportunity, and then he'll let him try.

A customer walks in, so the manager approaches him and says: "Good evening, sir! How may I help you?"

"I'd like to buy some grass seeds.", say...

One day a travelling salesman was driving around Appalachia and decided to stay the night in a farmhouse.

After enjoying a fine meal with the farmer, the salesman turned to him and said, "What is it like for hiring a companion for the evening?"

"Well," replied the farmer, "I'm afraid there are not many women around these parts. But there's always Cletus........."

"Oh?" said the salesman, i...

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A salesman knocks on the door and a little boy answers...

he's drinking his father's favorite scotch and smoking a fresh cigar while wearing his mother's favorite bedsheets as a toga.

"Are your parents home?" asked the salesman.

to which the boy replied, "Does it fucking look like it?"

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Three insurance salesmen were each boasting about there service.

The first one said, "Last month, when one of my insured died suddenly, I got the news within six hours. A check was mailed to his wife the next day." "That's nothing," says the second salesman. "Last week, when one of my insured died suddenly, I got the news within forty-five minutes. That afternoon...

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A women comes to sex shop

She aproaches the salesman and says "I want to take a look at your dildos please"
"Here, you can pick the blue one or the yellow one", salesman suggests
"I will take that big red one!" - Women shouts
"Ma'am, fire extinguisher is not for sale'

A door to door salesman knocked on a door and a woman answered.

Salesman - Hello. Would you like to buy a book titled '500 Excuses to Tell Your Wife After Staying Out Late'?

Woman - Why on earth would I buy a book like that?

Salesman - Because I sold a copy to your husband earlier today.

A software salesman died and was greeted by St. Peter at the gate to heaven.

Upon examining the great book, St.Peter tells the salesman he has an equal number of good and bad things in his life’s history, so the choice of heaven or hell is his decision to make.

The salesman, hesitant to make such a momentous decision, asks if he can tour both places to assist him wit...

A blonde walks into a store and asks, may I buy that tv, the store salesman say, sorry, we don't serve blondes.

she comes the next day with her hair dyed black, and

asks the same guy, can I buy this tv. the salesman says, sorry, we don't serve

blondes. frustrated, the next day she dyes her hair red and to make sure, she asks a

different salesman, can I buy this tv. he says, sorry, we d...

A salesman knocks on a door

A salesman knocks on a door, as soon as the door opens he throws a mound of dirt on the floor of the house. The house owner begins to confront the salesman in a state of rage but before he can say anything the salesman pulls out a vacuum and sucks up the dirt with ease. The salesman says "I'm here t...

A traveling salesman was driving in the country when his car broke down.

He hiked several miles to a farmhouse, and asked the farmer if there was a place he could stay overnight.

“Sure,” said the farmer, “my wife died several years ago, and my two daughters are twenty-one and twenty-three, but they’re off to college, and I’m all by myself, so I have lots of room ...

I was unsure which mattress I should buy and the salesman told me to sleep on it.

Apparently there was a misunderstanding.

My grandfather was the best damn podium salesman in the business

He always stood behind his product.

A salesman approaches you

Thanks, but I'm not interested in microscopes right now.

Salesman: That's okay, take my business card anyway.

This text is tiny, I can't read it.

Salesman: Boy, do I have the product for you

A bald man walks into the Hair Club. “I’d like to buy a hair piece if the price is right.”

Hair Club Salesman: “Well sir, how much do you want toupee?”

Bald Man: “How about faux dollars faux hair?”


Sorry guys, I’ll show myself outta hair.

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The Toothbrush Salesman

A man had recently lost his job when he saw an ad in the local paper for a position selling toothbrushes. He went to the address and met with the boss. The boss liked him and decided to give him a shot.

“We’ll start you out with 10 toothbrushes” said the boss. “Once you sell those, come bac...

What did the world's first hotcake salesman say?

"SALES ARE UNPRECEDENTED!"

A salesman is assigned a new route that takes him to Texas for the first time...

After finishing his first sales meeting in Texas, It was getting late so he checked into a hotel and went to its restaurant for dinner. He ordered a small beer. The waitress brought him a huge mug.

“Waitress” he said, “I ordered a small beer.” She said, “ This is Texas. In Texas that’s a sma...

During the days of the Soviet Union a man walks into the local Lada dealership ...

He tells the salesman what color he wants and pays the full cost of the car.

The salesman takes the money and says he should come to pick up the car in 7 years.

The man asks whether that would be in the morning or afternoon.

The salesman asks what difference that makes.

...

Classic IBM salesman joke

Three women were talking about their husbands and their love making, and the first one says, "My husband is an athlete and when he makes love to me, he is so powerful that I am swept up in his body, and it's wonderful"

The second woman says, "My husband is a violinist, and when we make love, ...

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As old as the Hills and twice as dusty but no, I've never seen it here

The traveling salesman's car breaks,so he asked a farmer if he can stay there for a few days while his car gets fixed.

The farmer had 2 beautiful daughters, Nellie and Venus.

One night TS takes the older daughter "Venus"on a date to the drive in,using the farmers car.

The next...

A salesman knocked on a suburban door...

...and was greeted by a nine-year-old boy puffing away on a long black cigar. Stunned for a brief moment, he managed to regain his composure and say "Good afternoon. Would your mother or father be home?" The boy took the cigar out of his mouth, flicked ashes onto the carpet, and replied "What the f*...

A secretary, a salesman, and their boss...

A secretary, a sales rep, and their boss are walking to lunch when  they find an antique oil lamp.

They rub it and a Genie comes out in  a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you one wish."  

The secretary says, "I want to be in the B...

I once met a lizard who was a door-to-door pottery salesman

He could really rep tile

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A young salesman applies for a job in a big store

The manager asks him about his credentials, and the young man answers: "I can sell *everything*."

Encouraged by the young man's confidence, the manager offers him the job, and he starts right away. A week later, they review his performance.

"How many customers have you served?"
...

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The owner of a sex shop, hires a new clerk.

After the owner taught him the basics of running the store, he has to run an errand.

'Could you run the store on your own for a couple of hours, Jeremy?' he asks.

'Sure thing boss!' Jeremy replied, 'don't you worry, I've got this.'

So the boss leaves for his errands, leaving you...

A blonde and a salesman are bored on a plane

The salesman says to the blonde "I'm bored let's play a game. I'll ask you a question and if you don't know the answer you give me 5$, then you ask me something and if I don't know the answer I'll give you 500$"

The blonde agrees to the deal and so the salesman asks his first question "how fa...

Why is Arnold Schwarzenegger such a good sled salesman?

Because he knows how toboggan.

A car salesman is showing some fine cars for sale...

A car salesman is showing some fine cars for sale, and the buyer is looking at them.

"Well, this one is a fine 1951 Hudson Hornet," says the car salesman.

The buyer gasps, "A Hudson HORNET? Well, I wouldn't want to see a Hudson Wasp!"

The salesman brushes it off and shows him t...

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Four affluent fathers meet for a yearly round of golf.

Four affluent fathers meet up for their yearly golf match with each other. As fathers tend to do, they all start bragging about their children. The first father brags, "my son is a successful real estate agent! He's so successful, he gave a beautiful house to one of his friends for free!"

Th...

I ran into a salesman offering me a pencil with invisible lead.

I almost bought it, but I couldn't really see the point.

I tried arguing with the table salesman at the furniture store.

He kept making strong counter arguments, though.

A traveling salesman is passing through a small town.

He sees a sign for a circus. At the bottom it says “See the amazing Goldstein”. He has some time to kill, so he figures what the hell and stops in. It’s the usual dog and pony show until the very end, when there’s a drum roll, the lights go out, and a single spot shows a table in the center ring w...

A traveling salesman knocks on a door...

A traveling salesman knocks on a door. Seconds later, a stunning woman answers, wearing a see-thru neglige'. Her body is the stuff of dreams. She leans out the door and whispers- "Quick! I hear somebody coming! Come inside!" The man enters and the woman drops the neglige' to the floor. "Tell me", sh...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The best salesman in the world

The boy went into the mall to get a job. He told the management that he was the world's best salesman. They gave him a job as a seller, but expected profits from day one.

On Saturday evening the manager came down and asked how many customers he had served today. The boy said he had helped one...

A travelin' salesman...

...stops one night at a lonely, secluded farm, and asks the owners if they can host him for the night. the farmer is really sorry, but he has no free rooms. "I could make you sleep with my daughter" says the farmer, "but you have to promise me not to bother her". The salesman accepts. After a fillin...

We don’t sell to blondes

A blonde walks past a shop as she reads the sign “we don’t sell to blondes” in the window. She goes in to her investigate the situation.

To test the sign she asks the salesman “excuse me, I’d like to buy this TV”

And the salesman responds “I’m sorry ma’am we don’t sell to blondes”
...

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