UPJOKE
commercemarketplacegrocerytradegrocery storemartblack marketproductbusinessindustryretailcommodityeconomyfood marketmarket place

What would you call a hair product that was marketing batman?

Conditioner Gordon.

Marvel just did the most risky marketing move of all time.

Announcing “Avengers: Secret Wars” to the public kind of defeats the purpose.

Marketing

P.S. - I have much love and appreciation for my marketing friends. We all work together in this <3.

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, “Excuse me, can you ...

Accountant Joke

The CEO of a large corporation called his directors for a meeting. He asked the director of development, "Mr. Jones, what is two plus two?"

Mr. Jones, looking a bit confused, replied, "Two plus two is four, Sir."

The CEO said, "Ya, that\`s what I thought you would say." Then he asked...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two beggars are sitting on a sidewalk in Rome.

One is wearing a large cross, has rosary beads in his hand, and has a picture of the Virgin Mary. The other is wearing a kippah and tzitzit, and has a beard and side curls. The first is getting tons of money, but the second is hardly getting any. A priest comes to the second beggar, and says "you kn...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative. He kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I used some refined flour as lubricant and it did NOT work very well at all....

Yet those bastards in marketing are bold enough to call it "all-purpose"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A family of the Jacksons on vacation.

The parents ran a nail store, and their son was a marketologist. Once the dad told his son:

We're going on vacation for a couple weeks, I hope I can count on you looking after the store while we are gone.

The son quickly exclaims:

But dad, I'm a marketologist! I know nothing ab...

Two beggars were sitting side by side in front of the Love Fountain in Rome, Italy.

One had a Cross in front of him; the other one was holding the Star of David. Many people went by, looked at both beggars, but only put money into the box of the beggar sitting behind the Cross.

The Pope came to the area. He stopped to watch the throngs of people giving money to the beggar wh...

Who knew naming a for-profit investment app after an anti-rich hero was just marketing.

I’m astounded, and am immediately switching to one called Mother Theresa.

I'm starting up a local coffee shop and marketing it as an Ashley Madison meetup spot.

I'm calling it Grounds for Divorce.

The marketing team for the Veggie Food Company are having a brand meeting

"So the food techs have given us this amazing veggie bacon, what are we going to call it?" says the boss.
After hours of brainstorming and arguments, Sammy the intern says, "what about Facon?"
Everyone loves it and the boss promises him a bonus and a promotion.
"That's great, well done Samm...

Marketing Explained...

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I'm fantastic in bed". That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, "He's fantastic in bed". That's Advertising.

You'r...

A marketing team had to make a Coca-Cola ad for Arabia

So they sent their best man on the job. When he came back, they saw that the campaign failed miserably and nobody was buying the product. So the team asked him what happened. He explained:

We made a billboard with three images. On the first one, there is a person that is very unhealthy and a...

Marketing 101

A professor explained about marketing to MBA students.
1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party, you go to her and say I am rich, marry me. That's direct marketing.
2. You attend a party and your friend goes to the girl to tell her, he's rich, marry him. That's advertising.
3. The same g...

The top executives of the Budweiser beer company decide they need a fresh, new marketing initiative. One suggests that the Catholic church, being a well known, global brand just like themselves, would be a suitable sponsorship partner, so they send two of their most persuasive directors to Rome.

They are granted an audience with the Pope and explain that they want a commercial link-up with the Vatican. This would, of course, involve some careful 'product placement'. What they suggest is that the words in the Lord's prayer , 'Give us this day our daily bread', be replaced with, 'Give us this...

A casket company has started marketing clear glass coffins.

Don't know if they will be well received...remains to be seen.

What do you call a dog run marketing business

Barketing inc.

I tried to help my friend, but he ended up addicted to marketing.

Guess you could say I gave him some ad-vice.

Did you hear about Coronas new marketing campaign?

Apparently it's gone viral in China.

Follow the rules

A large corporation with expansive grounds interviewed a tribe of reformed cannibals for the outdoor maintenance positions. During the interview process, they were told, "You'll receive full benefits as employees, but you're not allowed to eat anybody, which would result in immediate dismissal and c...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The marketing lesson

This really happened, at least by what I've heard. A guy went to the market and saw a stand selling watermelons with a cardboard reading: "1 melon - 3$, 3 melon - 10$".

He decided to teach the seller a math lesson and bought a melon for 3$. Then he said "you know what, I would like one more" ...

The marketing guys at Corona don‘t know what to do next

Now that their campaign went viral

Marketing terms explained

1. You see a beautiful girl at a party. You walk right over to her and say, "I'm fantastic in bed!"
\--That's direct marketing.


2. You're at a party with friends and see a beautiful girl. One friend goes over to her, points at you, and says, "He's fantastic in bed."
\--That...

How A/C was invented

The four Goldberg brothers - Lowell, Norman, Hiram, and Maxwell - invent vehicle air conditioning. But they have a hard time marketing it.

Well, on one 97-degree Detroit summer day, the four brothers walk into old man Henry Ford's office and sweet-talk his secretary into telling him that four...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In 1985 Viagra began marketing it's own soda beverage

They called it Mount and Do.

Further more in 1986 the FDA decided it could no longer be called a *soft* drink.
Instead they labeled it a cock tail.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Marketing: lets create a fun and exciting cereal

**Executive:** okay... go on.

**Marketing:** it’ll have cool colors and fruity flavors...

**Executive:** omg yes

**Marketing:** and rabbits can fuck right off if they think they can have some!

Hertz car rentals announced a last minute marketing campaign today to avoid bankruptcy

They hired Michael Stipes from R.E.M. to remind people everybody Hertz

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.