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Robberies Jokes

There has been a string of unsolved futon robberies in my town recently.

Police think the criminals…are currently laying low.

Have you noticed how few robberies there has been lately?

Makes all the difference when it is not only bad guys wearing masks.

Police want to interview a man suspected for a string of robberies wearing stockings and suspenders.

However, the Chief Constable has insisted they wear their normal uniform.

Police have arrested a gang of Corn Flakes that they alledge committed a spree of armed robberies throughout the metro area. A Police spokesman described them as...

....cereal offenders.

I started carrying a gun after being involved in an attempted robbery a few months ago.

Ever since, my robberies have been going a whole lot better.

The FBI agent asked the bank teller after multiple robberies by the same guy

“Did you notice anything special about the man?"
"Yes, he seemed better dressed each time!"

Did you hear about the string of bank robberies committed by a guy dressed up like Jesus?

The cops finally nailed him.

What do you call ghosts commiting bank robberies?

The Polterheist

When my employer asked if I had a criminal record...

...I guess "highest number of robberies in an hour" wasn't the answer he was looking for.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man discovers he has been in a cult for the last year. OC

“How did you not know?” Asks his friend

“Well when everything happens bit by bit it all makes sense, the drugs, the robberies, the shrines.” He replies

“But what about the murder?” Asks the friend

“Well we were so high on acid that it just made sense, he was the King in Yellow t...

When I was younger, I always heard of people getting robbed at gunpoint.

If there's been so many robberies, why do people keep going to gunpoint?

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