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Purchasing Jokes

Why did the Hispanic man keep purchasing trains?

I'm not quite sure myself honestly but he has to have some sort of locomotive.

They just discovered the cause of the implosion

OceanGate was purchasing materials for the vessel and misunderstood the term "substandard".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A friend of mine was asking about purchasing viagra...

He said: “Do you know if it’s possible to get it over the counter?”

I said: “Well, I guess it depends how many you take...”

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A small person with a speech impediment was thinking about purchasing a mare for his stable.

He heads over to the ranch and asks the rancher if he could inspect the horse before he bought her. The two of them head into the stables and the rancher brings the mare out of her stall. The buyer does a walk around, inspecting the hooves and legs, before looking around for a stool. Seeing none, he...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Warning to all men about purchasing stuff on eBay. Be careful what you buy on eBay.

If you buy stuff on line, be sure to check out the seller very carefully.

I just spent £95 + post and packaging. on a penis enlarger.

Bastards sent me a magnifying glass.

The only instructions said, "Do not use in direct sunlight."

The one thing I know about purchasing land:

You have to buy a lot.

Why Was The Baker So Depressed About Purchasing Containers That Only Fit 12 Donuts?

If you ask him he will give you 13 Reasons Why.

When my wife goes out shopping she like to sample things before purchasing.

She is buy-curious.

Was thinking of purchasing some vacant real estate near my house so my wife could begin gardening after the holiday season.

But she said "I don't want a lot for Christmas."

After purchasing an oval Chinese frying pan at the diminutive British aristocrat’s yard sale

Nigel realized that he’d just taken a long wok off a short Peer.

Purchasing a rain barrel often leads to buying more water collecting devices

I guess you could say a rain barrel is a gateway jug.

(Modified from a story heard on NPR) : )

Even though it’s a surplus store, I’m pretty proud of myself for going into Costco and purchasing only ONE item.

A single package of 160 AA batteries.

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