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Leverage Jokes

Having a PhD. gains you leverage in online dating

Helps with handling rejections well.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A black man is driving in a Mercedes-Benz when he gets pulled over by a cop.

The cop asks him for his license and registration and begins to question him about his car. "Where'd you get the money to buy such a nice Benz?"

The man replies, "I'm a specialty surgeon, I enlarge assholes."

Skeptical, the officer asks more about the procedure. The man explains, "Fi...

I think this post will definitely raise the bar.

At least that’s what my physics textbook chapter on leverage tells me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This guy was cruising along a deserted Texas highway on his way to work..

doing 92 mph in an 85 zone. As he crests a slight hill he gets nailed by a highway patrolman running radar. Easing over onto the shoulder and coming to a stop, the officer walks up to the car and asks "License and registration please, and where the hell are you going in such a hurry?"

The...

Some engineers were arguing about God.

One says, "God was clearly a mechanical engineer. Just look at the structure of the bones, how they're shaped to carry their loads without wasted weight, how the joints interlock to give free movement, how the muscles are optimally placed as actuators with the best leverage."

The second repli...

Stuck

A man hears his wife's cries for help from the bathroom. He rushes there and his wife tells him she's stuck and can't get up. He tries to free her but soon gives in and decides to call 911. Just before the officer arrives he realizes his wife is as her mom made her, so he throws the first thing near...

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I went to the doctor for my first prostate exam, and I was nervous.

I really didn't feel comfortable when the doctor put his hand on my shoulder for "extra leverage". I really felt fucked when he put the other hand on my other shoulder.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Fart Football

One night, an elderly couple is sitting in bed. The husband reading while the wife quietly knits. Breaking the silence, the husband leans gently to one side, and unleashes an egregious fart. His wife crumples her face and writhes in near agony next to him, bemoaning the ubiquitous ass mist that was ...

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3 Guys on a dock

There are three guys out on a dock fishing. One of them thinks he has a fish and pulls up an old bottle. *Poof* A genie appears. "I've been in that damn bottle for... I don't even know how long," says the genie. "I'm going to grant all three of you three wishes!"

The fishermen are ecstatic. T...

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