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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Signal box operative

New job


Guy goes for a job as a train signal box operative.

The examiner tests him for his thinking abilities.

"Ok. You have a train coming down the A line what do you do"?

"Simple, just give him a green go signal and the jobs done"!

"Great" says the examiner.<...

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An old lady was in bed with her young lover when she suddenly hears her husband pull into the driveway..

"Quick!" she tells her lover. "Hide in this cupboard!"

So saying she pushes the naked guy in the cupboard and hastily puts on her clothes. But the cupboard is a tight fit so the guy's balls are left out hanging between the cupboard doors.

The old husband enters the house and walks into...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman was having an affair while her husband was at work. One day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband’s car pull into the driveway.

“Oh My God – Hurry! Grab your clothes,” she yelled to her lover. “And jump out the window. My husband’s home early!”

I can’t jump out the window. It’s raining out there.

If my husband catches us in here, he’ll kill us both, she replied.

So the boyfriend scoots out of bed, grabs ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

[Long] There was a man named Joe, a carpenter who made incredible furniture

He lived in a small city, but it was always full of people trying to buy furniture from Joe's store, Arge Oaks. Every Saturday Joe would go out into the forest to cut wood for his furniture. One Saturday Joe decided to go further out into the forest, in order to see the older and larger trees. He ca...

Mrs. Johnson

There was a lady who was cheating on her husband with a boyfriend. One day while they were getting intimate she hears her husband pull into the driveway. Her boyfriend says "oh no! What should we do?!" She says "hurry! Get dressed and go to the living room!" Once they're in the living room she start...

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