After the UN summit, it was really shameful to see so many people basically openly mocking a mentally challenged child.

Though to be fair, Trump kinda had it coming.

What is the equivalent of 2,000 mocking birds?

2 kilomockingbirds.

Mocking anti-vaxxers on the internet these days is like unvaccinated children

It never gets old.

Just as the Count was about to pounce on van Helsing, the door to the library was flung open.

Incontinently, a host of furious villagers stormed into the library, waving blazing torches and voicing dire threats. The Count turned to leap on them, then reeled back, repelled at the reek of garlic that wafted from them like a solid thing.

"Count Dracula!" cried the burgomaster, a solid ci...

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The history of the middle finger

I never knew this before, and now that I know it, I feel compelled to send it on to my more intelligent friends in the hope that they, too, will feel edified. Isn't history more fun when you know something about it?

Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory ov...

Which bird has the worst manners?

Mocking birds.

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A Laotian businessman opened a small store in London.

He was very quiet and diligent with his bookkeeping. He always made sure to help out his employees when he could, typically hiring other Laotians in the area who were struggling to find work.

Among these employees was a group of three friends from Surrey. Although they were a bit rowdy and so...

Mocking Religions is Bad, Mmkay?

This reminds me of that story in II Galoshians 4:12-25

12.Children, remember when our Lord, Christ, hung on the cross, looking down toward his disciples and saw even Peter, who had denied him.

13. "Peter," spake the Lord.

14. Peter heard his Lord speak his name, but no more, so...

A Spanish man, an Italian man, and an English man are seated together on a flight to the US.

As they talk during the flight, they discover that they are all on extended business trips, and they each spent their last night at home making love to their wives.

The Spanish man says, "I made love to my wife three times, and when it was time for me to leave she cried and cried for me to st...

A Frenchman, a Spaniard, an Italian, and an American, were bragging about who was the best lover.

The Frenchman began: "I made love to my wife four times last night, and the next morning she told me I was the greatest lover alive."

The Spaniard follows up: "I made love to my wife six times last night, and the next morning she told me no other man could ever compare to me."

The Ital...

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An annual weaponry competition is being held.

There is one representative each from every country. Each representative wields the main weapon of sorts from their culture. A fly is released within the range if the representative and they must cut it. The nore precise or beautiful the cut, the more points.

The next competitor goes up, repr...

A man walks into an LGBTQ center

He walks up to the front desk and introduces himself. "Hello, I identify as a chocolate bar. Can I join?"


The receptionist replies "Sir, that's disgraceful! You're mocking the community. We're going to have to ask you to leave."


"You can't call me sir!" The man exclaims. "I...

I just made a scathing video mocking the Amish

I can't wait till they see it

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A brash American tourist got seated next to a Chinese man in a plane.

Mid flight, the Chinese man ordered for a marmalade sandwich. The American could not contain his curiosity so he struck up a conversation with his seatmate.

"You enjoyin' that sandwich, pal?" he asked

"Yes" politely answered the Chinese man after he took a bite and made a few chews....

The old Mexican

Rain is pouring down heavily in Chicago and standing in front of a big puddle outside a pub was an old Mexican man, drenched, holding a stick with a piece of string dangling in the water.

A young guy passing by stopped and asked, “What are you doing, sir”

“Fishing” replied the old ma...

So one day a guy walks in a bar

and sits next to his friends, after a few drinks he needs to go to the bathroom and he goes for the urinal next to an african-american man, when he was finishing he sees the other man's thing and asks: "how do you guys get it that big ?" to which the man replys: " we hit it to concrete everyday " wi...

If we truly become what we mock...

...I think I'm going to start mocking some smarter, more successful people, for a change.

What's a Mexicans favorite book?

Tequila mocking bird

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(Overhead in a Arabic cafe- very nasty) A Tunisian, Algerian and Egyptian are arguing...

About whose the manliest out of all three. They decide to have a competition. They go to the zoo and rob three monkeys. They decide whoever gets the monkey pregnant must be the manliest man there is.

So the Tunisian shags his monkey and gets her pregnant and she gives birth to four little hum...

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A boy gets stopped by a cop on a horse while riding his new bike.

A boy gets stopped by a cop on a horse while riding his new bike. The cop then asks the boy if Santa gave him the bike. The boy happily replies with a yes. The cop then says “well, tell Santa that there needs to be a light at the front!” before he promptly gives him a ticket. The boy, quite angry a...

A math teacher is teaching his class in a green costume

Halloween was soon, so he and most of the school was dressed up.

He decided to dress up as The Flash, as he was a popular character among the students, but not knowing the character well, he ended up with a green version of the costume.

After a bit of mocking by the students, he began ...

What do you call a fat mockingbird?

two kilo mocking bird

Jesus at the last supper

Jesus speaks to his apostles during the last supper and says, "One of you will betray me."

John turns to Jesus with fear in his eyes and asks, "Will it be me? Will I betray you lord?" Jesus smiles kindly at John and says, "No my brother, you will not betray me".

Peter next approaches J...

Whats a 1960s author favourite type of alcohol?

Tequila Mocking Bird.

There are two things that never get old.

* Mocking people who don't vaccinate their kids.

* Their kids.

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Once there was a loud mouthed hyena...

He would walk around the savanna mocking all the other animals, even the King himself, the Lion. One day his wife, the Lioness asked him:
"Why do you let that stupid hyena taunt you like that? You are the king. Do something about him."
But he simply responded:
"Let him be. He isn't hurting ...

"I'm NOT a window cleaner!"

(Inspired by IT crowd)

One gloomy day in London a man by the name of Roy walks in a park, taking a short break from his job in an IT department. Suprisingly, he runs into an old school friend named Alister during his walk, and they catch up. Alister is a local writer for a very famous publish...

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I bought a parrot at an auction...

I bought a parrot at an auction, hoping that a companion might help me get through some tough times. The car ride home, the parrot had been quiet and an uneasy tension was building. Throughout the first night, my parrot remained quiet, but the next morning, I awoke to a machine-gun sequence of swe...

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So Ms. Delinsky is trying to get her 4th-graders to settle down for a quiz.

She's been having real problems with her newest year of students, who as always seem way rowdier than the year before them. She blames smart phones and internet memes for this. However, Ms. Delinsky a clever lady, and she thinks she has a plan. She's going to start a 'meme' in her class: Quiz Positi...

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At a May Day parade, a very old Jew is carrying a placard which reads:

"Thank you, comrade Stalin, for my happy childhood!" A Party representative approaches the old man.

"What's that? Are you mocking our Party? Everyone can see that when you were a child, comrade Stalin hadn't yet been born!"

The old man replies, "That is precisely why I am grateful to h...

The LAST Last Supper

On the eve of his crucifixion, Christ gathered his disciples for a final meal.

As he broke bread, Christ turned to the table and said, "On this night, one of you shall betray me."

There is a panicked murmur among the disciples.

Finally Peter steps forward. "Is it I, Lord? Am I ...

Old and Pregnant?

A 68 year old woman told her friend over a bingo game that she wanted to have a baby. Her friend, in reasonable disbelief, laughed at her.

The 68 year old woman retorted, "Well, I have the apparatus to and with today's technology, I can have a baby."

And she did just that. She got pr...

There was this epileptic Roman ruler...

...who was prone to occasional fits. He was also very self-conscious about it. One day, one of his guards (who also suffered from epilepsy) went into convulsions in the hall while the monarch was eating dinner.

Assuming that the man was mocking him, the dictator furiously ordered him to be t...

How do you dismiss a bird that's making fun of you at a bar?

Tequila mocking bird.

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A man was playing golf one day when he sliced the ball deep into a thicket of trees.

The man went further and further into the trees, searching for his ball, and came upon a bright light that was floating in mid-air.

"Who or what are you?" the man asked.

The bright light materialized into a fairy and said, "I am the Golf Fairy. For the next year, you will be the great...

Statistician and bomb.

Found this on Raymond Smullyan's book "To Mock a Mockingbird". Hope you might like it.


There is the story of
a statistician who told a friend that he never took airplanes: "I
have computed the probability that there will be a bomb on
the plane," he explained, "and although this p...

Two friends are talking in a bar...

Their names are Fred and Michael. They've known each other for a while, 15 years roughly. So they feel pretty comfortable with each other talking about more...sensitive topics. On this occasion, Fred decided to ask Michael about his son as it was something that had been nagging him for a while but h...

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A man finds himself in pure darkness...

Attempting to search for a light source, he waves his arms around.

Feeling a button, he clicks it and a television screen activates. A creature in a strange mask appears.

The strange being then opens it mouth, saying,"I want to play a game."

The man, in horror, can merely stare ...

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An atheist and little girl were sitting next to each other on an aeroplane.

'Flight goes quicker when two aeroplane buddies chat to each other,' said the atheist to the little girl.

'What would I want to talk to you about?' replied the little girl.

'I dunno, maybe about how why there is no God.'

Now the girl believed in God and was also very smart indee...

The man, the Curator, and the Wax Museum.

A man walks into a wax museum. Inside finds a display of little wick people on a giant map of the United States. However, one of the people, a cowboy is placed in New York City. He calls the curator and asks why that one isn’t over in a place like Texas or Oklahoma.

“Oh, Ed doesn’t fit in ...

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A young man had dreamed of becoming a paratrooper.

After training for months, the time had finally come for him to make his first real jump. The night before, in a panic, he called his father – who had also been a paratrooper.


“Dad” he said, “Tomorrow is my first jump and I don’t think I can do it.”


“Don’t worry,” said his fath...

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