I've compiled a list of the top 10 click bait articles on the internet

Number 7 will shock you

They say certain types of people can resist a good click bait.

Apparently you aren’t one of them.

I was trying to track down a man and a woman, so I set a trap, and baited it with raw chicken.

And that's how I got Sam and Ella.

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Old Man Overboard

An elderly couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy.

They were standing on the back of the boat, watching the moon, when a wave came up and washed the old man overboard.

They searched for days and couldn't find him, so the captain sent the old woman back to shore with the pro...

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Newby Salesperson (Long joke)

NOTE: My husband thinks this joke is sexist, but I think it's hilarious.

A young man desperately needed a good paying job, so he applied as a salesperson for a large, everything-under-one-roof store.

The manager, seeing how young the man was, was doubtful he could sell anything, but th...

How do you catch a fish with a computer?

Use click bait.

I was fishing on vacation in Florida, when I ran out of bait. I saw a small snake nearby trying to swallow a frog and knowing the snake couldn’t bite me with the frog in his mouth, I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket...

Now, the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit.

I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth.

His eyes rolled back, he went limp.

I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog.

A litt...

What kind of bait cannot be used for fishing?

The Answer Will Shock You!

One fisherman said to the other: "Using bait during fishing isn't necessary".

The other fisherman said: "that's debaitable".

Yesterday I was sentenced to death for writing so many click bait headlines

What happens next will shock you

What's the difference between ramen soup and an Oscar-bait movie?

You watch one for three minutes, stirring occasionally. You watch the other for three hours and it's occasionally stirring.

Jane couldn't quite work out why she didn't like her husband's new hobby.

But as he grabbed his bait and rod for the fifth day in row, she new it seemed fishy.

A good advice to avoid click bait

Better luck next time.

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The secret fishing bait

An angler walks into a tackle shop and heads to the counter. “Give me the best bait you’ve got,” he says. “My buddy told me there’s a fishing spot down by the creek here, and he always get lots of bites when using your bait.”

The clerk pulls out a small jar of bait which fills the shop with ...

Have you heard about the woman who got pregnant from a sperm donor without telling her partner?

It was a master bait & switch.

Hey girl, are you click bait?

Because I see 10 reasons why you're perfect and you won't believe #5

I fell victim to a click bait.

Just like you.

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Taking The Bait

An old farmer is sitting on his front porch watching the sunrise when he sees the neighbor's kid walk by carrying a spool of something metallic under his arm. "Hey boy, whatcha got there?"

"Chicken wire."

"What you gonna do with that?"

"Gonna catch some chickens."

"You da...

Where did Buzz feed learn to click bait so well from?

Me

My mate has just won an award for beating another 12 men in a bait digging contest.He has now been crowned.

The master baiter.

Avoiding click-bait is impossible.

My point exactly.

Fishing is for Narc's

Just saying that there seems to be an awful lot of baiting and entrapment going on

So i walked into a bait shop this morning

And i didnt even mean to.

20 AMAZING Reasons Click Bait Still Works!

1. People are stupid enough to click things that grab their attention.

Click bait is everywhere these days.

Scroll down to see how many fell for it.

I heard this one 45 years ago, I hope its correct.

After high school I took a year break before college. I decided to take a position on a local fishing boat. I started off as the guy how cuts all of the bait for the seasoned fisherman. By the time summer was over I had worked my way up to the main guy who baited all of the hooks. I asked the captai...

Women bait me into feeling ugly so they can learn how much money I make.

Turns out, I’m ugly and poor.

Today in History class we learned that evil slave traders used to lure and capture Kalahari bushmen by speaking their language to draw them out in the open.

A terrible, early form of click bait.

I'm sick of these undercover cops always trying to bait me with online female personas.

Nice try f/bi.

I overheard some guy tell his sweet, old grandmother a joke about click-bait at her deathbed. What happened to her as a result will change your life forever!

Nothing. Absolutely nothing happened.

Stop clicking on click-bait!


(note/edit/whatever: I know this joke is a big gamble in terms of possible downvotes, but I just made it up and thought it was too good to not share with at least 1 person that might like it. Happy belated Hallowee...

I have a super easy way to see how good you are at avoiding click bait.

Turns out you are terrible at it..

The Blind Sales Clerk

A woman goes into Cabela’s to buy a rod and reel for her grandson’s birthday. She doesn’t know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.

The clerk was standing behind the counter wearing dark glasses. She says to him, “Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about...

I went fishing on my boat

I had been fishing for a while and hadn’t caught anything until up to that moment, and, to make things worse. I ran out of baits.
So I had this ingenious idea.

I got a piece of paper and wrote “bait” on it, hooked it and threw it into the water.

I was amazed when I felt something pu...

A court ruled that sharing click-baits is punishable by death.

What happens next will shock you.

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A man was going ice fishing.

He goes out onto the ice, cuts open a hold, and lowers his bait into the hole. 45 minutes pass, and the man has not gotten a nibble. A younger man walks out onto the ice, drills a hole right next to him, lowers his bait, and within a few minutes has hooked a largemouth bass.

The first man is...

What did they call click bait in the Middle Ages?

Nothing the internet wasn't invented until like the 1970s.

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Young Timmy rushed out on Christmas morning

Young Timmy rushed out on Christmas morning, anticipating that he'd be getting a new Nintendo Console this year.

"Surprise!" shouted his parents. "We know you wanted video games, but we think you need to get outdoors more. We got you this set of fishing gear! Unfortunately, it was rather expe...

You won't believe these 7 things you can do to avoid click bait

Redditors hate them

Welcome to the click-bait club

You won’t believe what the first rule is

I recently saw a catfish at my local river.

No clue how it baits the hook with those tiny paws.

Click here to take a free click bait prevention test!

You failed

Two lying, click-bait advertisers walk into a bar.

You'll never believe what happens next!

Facebook is getting rid of engagement bait

Guess I can't go phishing anymore.

So there is a Priest, a Rabbi, and an Atheist in a boat fishing.

The priest says "Oh heavens, I forgot my lures back on land" and steps out of the boat, walks across the water back to the land, and grabs his lures before walking back to the boat.

The atheist was astounded, but before he could make sense of the situation, the rabbi says "Oh Hashem help me, ...

A man walks into the head office of a click-bait news site...

...what happens next will shock you!!!

Three friends are out fishing, having a competition to see who can catch the biggest fish.

The first guy says “Ill use worms as bait, surely this will catch the largest fish. My dad was a fisherman for all of his life, and taught me all of his tricks to catching the biggest fish. There is no possible way you guys can beat me.”

The second guy bursts out laughing. “You expect to catc...

I really hate articles that say 5 reasons why something is best and 5 reasons why it's the worst.

The whole argument is completely valid for the reason something is best. Which makes it a good article.

It actually makes the article just so contradictory it sucks.

But they are so easy to read and generally they are well written.

There are so many that each time Google recomme...

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Gator Bait

A man walks into a bar, with a large alligator under one arm. He throws him up on the bar, smacks him upside the head with a big stick, and the gator slowly opens his gaping jaws wide. The man pulls down his pants, lays his schlong in the gator's mouth, for a good minute. Then he pulls it out, pulls...

Only When you perfect the art of fishing and baiting hooks..

Will you become a Master Baiter

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Trucker is hauling a B-double with three containers full of computer parts.

It's getting on toward dark, and so he stops at a steakhouse for a bite.


The first thing he sees is a sign on the door:


NO THONGS


NO SINGLETS


NO NERDS


MANAGEMENT RESERVES THE RIGHT TO REFUSE ADMISSION


No nerds? Weird. But whatever...

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Little Fisherman

Somewhere near a big lake lives Jon together with his cat.

Early in the morning Jon wakes up, washes his face and goes to the kitchen. He takes his bag of bread, takes out a few slices and butters them up. puts some cheese on it and stores them is his bread box. Picks up his fishing pole an...

What news sources do fish prefer?

Click bait (sorry for the dad joke)

What's the worst part about baiting a fish hook really well?

Everyone knows you're a master baiter!

Fishermen hate him- You won't believe the one item he uses to catch more fish than anyone else

Click bait.

Court decision: "I hereby find you guilty of clickbait, and sentence you to death by electric chair......

....what happens next will shock you."

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A principal notices a Post-It on a locker.

"Jocks of JFK High! This small change in diet can boost your physique FOREVER! Head to the gym to find out how!"

Puzzled, he pulls it off and continues down the hall. Just a few lockers down, another catches his eye.

"Hey goth girls! Tired of dark eyeliner that just runs all day? One ...

An in-depth test to see if you know how to avoid Clickbait

Apparently not!

(From my 9 year-old son) What type of fish should you use to catch other fish?

Bait-a fish.

A father had promised his two young sons he would take them on a fishing trip

The boys were digging for fishing bait in their parents' garden. Uncovering a many legged creature, one of the boys proudly dangled it before his Father.

"No, son, he won't do for bait" his Father said. "He's not an earthworm".

"He's not?" the boy asked, his eyes wide. "What planet i...

Look, I know she ate a worm but

we are not here to debate de bait deb ate.

In high school some kids told me they’d give me $20 to hang out with them.

Turns out it was just clique bait.

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Two men are fishing.

One asks the other how his recent marriage is going.

"Not so well. We haven't been able to consummate the marriage. The wife has gonorrhea."

"Wow, that's bad. I suppose there's always oral sex?"

"Nope. She has a serious gum infection - pyorrhea."

"Is she up for, ahem, an...

Why didn't the fisherman make it as a rapper?

His lines were okay, but his hooks were debaitable.

Do you know the one step to avoiding Clickbait?

Obviously not

Two fishermen were fishing off the rocks...

The first fishermen was catching fish so fast they we're practically jumping straight into his bucket.

The second fishermen asked the first what his secret was. To which the first responded.

I have no wife, or girlfriend, I am a very lonely man.

The first fishermen didn't unders...

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A Priest takes a walk down to the docks one day

and runs into a fisherman that attends his church. Upon hearing that the priest has a few hours off the fisherman invites him out to sea to fish with him.

Out at sea it doesn't take long for the fisherman to realize that the priest has no idea how to fish, so he gives him some quick instructi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman contacts her brother-in-law last minute to ask him to watch her daughter for the day...

The brother-in-law, Tim, grudgingly agrees. He picks the girl up and takes her down to the shoreline where he works.

"Do you know what I do for a living?"

She nods. "You're a fisherman, right?"

"Well, kind of. See, we get a lot of fish around here, and in order to catch as ma...

A fishing day

Once upon a time, a guy went to the river in order to enjoy nature and to do some fishing. When he was there he found out that he had forget the baits so he took a paper and wrote " lure " on it ,he put it on the hook and he had a sit waiting for a prey. After a while, he felt a move from the thread...

What do fishermen do in their free time?

They master bait

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