UPJOKE
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I've got awful commitment issues

I couldn't commit to a suicide attempt to save my life

Some of my friends are really hurtful. I feel like many of them don't understand the meaning of the word "commitment".

I've invited them to four of my weddings in the past two years and they haven't attended any of them.

I have a joke about commitment

Steve was deeply committed to playing golf. Ever day, seven days a week, fifty two weeks a year. After several years went by, Steve was still playing golf. As he was about to putt the ball in the hole. He notice a funeral procession going by. He then took off his hat and gave a moment of silence for...

We’ve been trying to organize a Fear of Commitment workshop.

But we just can’t seem to nail down a date.

What's a real commitment to dying?

Deadication

I shouldn’t have bought balloons from a salesman with commitment issues.

There were no strings attached.

commitment issues

Doctor: You might have a phobia of marriage. Do you think you have the symptoms?

Man: Can’t say I do.

Doctor: Yes. That’s the main one.

My long distance girlfriend called me saying she finally wants to meet me in person. I left her this message right before my phone died: “This is very important: I am not a man that normally makes huge commitments, but I think the time is right for us to see each other.”

Unfortunately, my phone died right after “man.”

I have a problem with commitment

Never mind that joke is lame anyway

My girlfriend says I'm scared of commitment

Well, she's not really my girlfriend...

What do you call a fruit who's afraid of commitment?

A can't-elope

People say I lack the commitment to finish anything, and they might be right.

Because right now, I just don't care enough to

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is the difference between participation and commitment?

A chicken participates in breakfast. A pig is committed to it.

I'm the outdoor type.

As soon as a woman mentions commitment, I'm out the door.

Marriage means commitment.

Of course, so does insanity.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a woman that tries to force you into commitment?

A booby trap

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Being sexist is easy. Learning to be respectful takes a long commitment and solid effort.

That's what she said.

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