When you get a bladder infection

Urine trouble

Vaginal yeast infections

Will make the south rise again!

Did you hear about the coronavirus infection rate spiralling out of control in the Irish capital?

It's Dublin.

What's the country with the highest incidence of mid-leg infection in the entire world?

Germany

What do you call a redhead with a yeast infection?

Gingerbread

Did you hear about the group of Kansas City football players who all contracted skin infections while smoking marijuana?

The Joint Chiefs of Staph

She had a yeast infection so bad

I stuck a hotdog up her and it came out a corn dog.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife has a yeast infection..

Now she understands what it’s like to be with an irritating cunt.

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What infection can you get for having nasal sex?

Sniffilis

-Sir, you have a bladder infection.

-What’s that?

-Urine trouble, sir.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Singles on a deserted island

A luxury cruise ship offered a cruise for young singles only. But halfway through the voyage, the ship crashed. The Captain had been having a affair and didn't see the giant rock formation. The cruise ship went down in record time (as did the Captain). Most people on board were too drunk to act fast...

I live in MD and the governor is all “Don't go to the bar. Don't meet up with your friends. Don't come home with an infection.”

Honestly, Gov. Larry Hogan is starting to sound like my wife.

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?

A quarter pounder with cheese.

The moment we find out dogs really could sniff out coronavirus infections...

We'd ask WHO, let the dogs out! WHO! WHO!

According to the Chinese Zodiac, 2020 was the Year of the Rat

So we've been spending the entire year holed up, only briefly leaving to get food, running at the sight of other humans, and transmitting infection.

My girlfriend constantly suffers from urinary tract infections

I told her she put the uti in cutie.

"China reports no new coronavirus local infections!" says a Chinese national to random strangers on the Internet

"But Hong Kong and Taiwan are still reporting in new cases" replied the random guy on the Internet.

"No… Hong Kong and Taiwan is not… uh… Yes, China is … uh…"

The real reason all the libraries are closing is not to help stop the spread of infection.

Its becuase after all the toilet paper was gone, people all started to check out the books with 1000+ pages

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Introducing: The Karen Infection Collection toy line!

*Wheeze with laughter through your ventilator as you watch your children make short-term memories with... The Karen Infection Collection!*

*They'll love spending their last days playing with their new favorite toys, like Protestor Pete - who comes with accessories like a vial of crocodile tea...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Nsfw. Why do women get yeast infections?

Because God wanted them to know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt.

What did the doctor say to the patient suffering from a bacterial infection?

Ah, I see you're a man of culture as well

How did Alice feel when her doctor told her she is genetically more likely to develop a yeast infection?

Thrush-traited

So there's only one state with no confirmed coronavirus infections, do you know which one it is?

The state of denial

I got a highly contagious viral infection from online communities.

It must be all those social media influenzas.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

News from School

Dear Mom and Dad,

It has been three months now since I left for college. I have been remiss in writing and I am very sorry for my thoughtlessness in not writing before. I will bring you up to date now, but before you read on, please sit down. You are not to read further unless you are s...

Why did the mushroom go to the party?

Because he’s a fungi.

What did the mushroom get after leavinf the party?

Fungal infection.

Doctor told me I have viral eye infection...

Must be the cornea virus

COVID 19 infection is asymptomatic in children, but has an elevated fatality rate among the elderly.

They should call it "KO Boomer."

I never thought I'd have a fungal infection

But then it grew on me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with anal infection went to the doctor,the doctor said "the only cure that exist, is to stick a cucumber in your butthole"

so the man went back home to his wife, explained to her what happened, and asked her to help him out.

man: "honey you should do as the doctor instructed me to do"

wife: "okay, what should I do?"

man: "hold one butt cheek with your left hand and, the other with your right hand,...

What did the doctor say to the man with a serious urinary tract infection?

Urine trouble

Hey girl, are you a urinary tract infection?

‘Cuz ur-in-ate out of 10

In the distant past your limbs would simply be cut off if you got an infection

This was the med-evil period

News: A Major Fashion Label Releases a Cream for Yeast Infections

It's called "Gucci Coochie Goo".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just got an eye infection for rubbing it too hard.

I guess I can’t masturbate for awhile now.

My last girlfriend wasn’t all bad.

She put the “fun gal” in fungal infection.

As a nurse, my wife contracted Covid and I thought it was a joke.

But her boss said it is a serious staff infection . . .

Me and my infections finally got together

and had a staff meeting

I sure am getting tired of this infection in my chest but I can’t even be mad at the bacteria

I mean, home is where the heart is after all

How do you know a person is a werewolf...

...and not just someone with a beast infection?

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A man to doctor regarding his testicle problem.

Man- doc, my testicles are turning blue..

Doc- I think there's an infection growing in your testicle, we'll have to cut it before it reaches other.

2 days later...

Man- doc, my other testicle also has started turning blue.

Doc- we'll have to cut you're another testicl...

My brother swears that he has to stay horizontal due to an ear infection and that it's therefore not unreasonable to expect me to cook all his meals.

I'm not sure whether I believe him though as he lies a lot.

What do you call a cabbage patch doll with a yeast infection?

Saurkrout

Did you hear about the pregnant redhead with a yeast infection?

She just gave birth to a healthy baby gingerbread man.

What did the urologist say when she suddenly discovered a cure for Urinary Tract Infections?

Urethra!

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