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Syndrome Jokes

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Wife got her test results back. We thought she had Tourette’s syndrome. Tests were negative.

Turns out I am a cunt & she does want me to fuck off

My doctor diagnosed me with "Autocorrect Syndrome"

I didn't even know I was I'll.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The doctor said I had Gloria Gaynor Syndrome

At first I was afraid...

I recently read a book on 'Stockholm Syndrome'

I hated it as first, but by the end, I really loved it

I have a friend with Reverse Tourette Syndrome.

Random people just swear at them for no reason.

I recently learned the phrase Stockholm Syndrome

I wasn’t a big fan of it at first, but I’ve grown to love it

Was going to call my dog “Syndrome”

But what do I tell if he starts jumping on people?

Doctor: I am afraid you are suffering from Tom Jones syndrome.

Patient: Is it common?

Doctor: It's not unusual.

I have Imposter Syndrome

…









Don’t I?

Just been diagnosed with Swedish flat pack syndrome.

Sadly I have no IKEA what it means.

I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome.

It started off badly but by the end I really liked it.

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A woman took her husband to the doctor.

"He can't talk, only sings!" she told him in some distress. "I can't communicate with him anymore!"

The doctor asked the husband, "Is this true? Are you only able to sing now?"

The husband looked at the doctor and burst out, "Well she's all you'd ever want, she's the kind I'd like to f...

"Doc, I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.' 'Is it common?' I asked.

It's not unusual' he replied.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome

I wanted my first time to be special

Why does the lion say “I’m the king of the jungle”?

Because he has mane character syndrome

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Mental health hotline.



Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.


If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.


If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.


If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.


If y...

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What do you call a Russian with Tourette’s Syndrome?

Yukanol Fukov

My doctor told me I have peek-a-boo syndrome.

They sent me to the I see you.

I watched a movie about Stockholm Syndrome

It captured me even though i didnt like it at first, but by the end i absolutely loved it

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I got an email at work that really made me feel like I had Impostor Syndrome

But I talked to my therapist and he said I wasn't good enough to have that, so I feel much better now.

\[I'd like to think that is original, but I am sure I am unwittingly riffing on something I heard... more impostor syndrome!\]

I was searching up Alzheimer’s syndromes

But the links were all purple

I’m on this great new drug to control my Tourette Syndrome.

I swear by it.

I have a girlfriend with restless leg syndrome

I tell everyone - I get a kick out of it.

A wife comes home one day and tells her husband she has been diagnosed as suffering from split personality syndrome.

“I thought you were just role playing”, replied the husband.

“No, but my psychologist has given me two options, live with it or lose one of the personalities” she says. “What do you think I should do”?

The husband thinks for a moment, “remind me dear, which one likes it in the ass”?

Why do people with irritable bowel syndrome have a hard time making decisions?

They can’t trust their gut

It’s been a nightmare trying to find a keynote speaker for our first ever Impostor Syndrome conference..

Everyone I’ve asked has told me that they don’t deserve to be there.

I went to a group therapy meeting for those suffering from the imposter syndrome.

If they only knew that I did belong there.

Doctor: I'm sorry John, but you suffer from Auto Correct Syndrome

John: I didn't even know I was I'll

I often tell people I have Imposter Syndrome

But I'm sure they can tell I'm lying.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The bloke with turrets syndrome

This bloke with Tourette's Syndrome walks into the most exclusive restaurant in town.

'Where's the pissing, mother fucking manager, you cock sucking arsewipe?' he inquires of one of the waiters.

The waiter is taken-aback and replies, 'Excuse me sir but could you please refrain from usi...

I named my dog Syndrome..

So when he's Misbehaving I yell "Down Syndrome"

^^^Stolen

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At 581 words this long one has the advantage of making you laugh many times even before the punchline.

An out of work pianist with Tourette's Syndrome was strolling around the streets and bars of London. Walking down Dean Street he sees a lounge bar with a sign in the window: 'Pianist wanted for evening performances'. "Fucking get in there you cunt!" he says to himself and goes to the bar.

<...

Agatha Christie

Agatha Christie would write one mystery novel after another without pause until her arms ached.

She was diagnosed with Marple tunnel syndrome.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a porn that stars only girls with Down Syndrome?

XXX

Why is premenstrual syndrome called PMS?

Because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

I was at the doctor's today and I learned I have Bartter Syndrome...

Wondering if anyone wants to trade?



(Yes that's a true syndrome, and come on, you knew the punchline before you read it).



[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartter\_syndrome](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bartter_syndrome)

What syndrome has people barking out potty humor?

Toilette’s syndrome

A man with tourette syndrome is selling birds.

All the parrots are returned.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Irritable Bowel Syndrome saved me from depression...

It’s hard to feel empty when you’re so full of shit.

It turns out that one of the doctors who I credited as a source in my book about impostor syndrome had falsified his credentials...

.. but every single one of my sources has so far admitted to being the fraudster.

What is the opposite of Down Syndrome?

Down Gooddeeddrome

I hate when people make fun of my Tourette syndrome

It really ticks me off

A joke about my parents marriage

My Dad: "I might be stupid but you love me"

My Mom: "Yeah well after almost thirty years together, you kinda start to feel a certain way"

Me: "Yeah, it's called Stockholm syndrome"

Just be thankful COVID-19 wasn't instead named East Asian Respiratory Syndrome.

"Dude, don't touch her. She has EARS!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Stockholm Syndrome

My wife and I have a great marriage and a healthy sex life, even after all these years. And I’d like to think that I’m pretty good at sex. But I do have low self esteem, so sometimes I wonder if I’m doing a good job, or if her vagina has Stockholm Syndrome.

What’s the only test a person with Down syndrome does well on?

A DNA test, they get a 47 out of 46.

I joined a forum for people with Down syndrome.

Comments are disabled.

The other day, my friend said that he thinks that I might have Asperger's Syndrome.

I couldn't tell if he was joking, or being serious, or happy, or sad, or angry, or frightened, or...

I'm writing a book on Impostor Syndrome!

Actually, wait a minute. Whatever made me think *I* was qualified to do that?

\*trudges off disconsolately\*

I just finished reading a book on Stockholm syndrome

I didn't care for it much at first, but after a while i could 't put it down.

A man with Down syndrome walks in to a bar

The barman says ' hey! Why the Mong face?'

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I ate nothing but beans for 48 hours

I now think I have Ass Purgers syndrome.

"Tom Jones Syndrome"

A man is in the waiting room at his Doctor's office and finally, the Doc arrives.

"Hello Jim what seems to be the problem today?"

Jim replies "Doc, you've gotta help me. I can't stop singing 'She's a Lady' by Tom Jones!"

The Doc says "oh yes, that is 'Tom Jones Syndrome'"
...

What do you call a stoner with Down Syndrome?

A baked potato.

Tomorrow is Downs Syndrome Awareness Day

You're supposed to wear crazy socks.

I'm just going to wear extra jeans.

Just found out I have irritable vowel syndrome...

Every time “U” tell me “I” have to do something it irritates the $h*t out of me.

I'm writing a book about my time growing up as a shy young boy with irritable bowel syndrome...

... i've decided to call it 'Diarrhoea Of A Wimpy Kid'

A patient once told me that he had imposter syndrome.

I told him he was just faking it.

Why do you never see a black person with Down Syndrome?

God doesn't punish anyone twice.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do we want? An end to tourette's syndrome.....

When do we want it? Cunt!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I saw a guy with down syndrome buying a pair of jeans today.

I thought to myself, "What a greedy bastard, haven't you got enough already?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tom Jones Syndrome

A man goes to the doctor with a complaint, "In my right ear, all I can hear is, 'What's New, Pussycat?'. In my left ear, 'Delilah'."

The doctor says, "We call that 'Tom Jones Syndrome'."

"Is that a common malady?"

"It's Not Unusual."

I want to get a dog and name it Syndrome.

So that every time he gets on my couch, I can yell "DOWN SYNDROME"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Tom Jones Syndrome

This guy went to his doctor and said,

“Doc, I can’t stop singing certain songs. All morning I’ve been humming ‘The Green, Green Grass Of Home.’ Yesterday it was, ‘Delilah.’ Last week I sang ‘What’s New Pussycat?’ at least 100 times! What’s wrong with me?”

The Doctor says, “Sounds ...

I once went to a convention about impostor syndrome...

...but I had to leave because I felt like I didn't belong

If people with down syndrome got an extra 21 chromosome..

Then, why isn’t it called up syndrome?

I'm reading a book about sufferers of tourettes syndrome...

I want to know what makes them tic.

How do you know if a deer has tourette's syndrome?

It has deer tics...

I have a dog named Syndrome.

But it gets kinda awkward when he jumps on someone and I have to shout out, DOWN SYNDROME!

I am a psyicician specializing in growth hormone deficiencies. I had planned to present an exhaustive list of the conditions and syndromes that I treat but I couldn't wait to post this...

I have little patients.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A 35 year old virgin, fed up with constant dating failures,

goes to see his doctor, for the umpteenth time. Fed up with the constant complaints, his doctor finally relents.

"Ok ok. There's a new guy in town, from Hong Kong. Chinese. Relationship specialist. I think he's a quack but it's worth a try." Says his doc and gives him the address.

Th...

I need a volunteer to test Stockholm syndrome.

Any takers?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My dog Syndrome keeps jumping up on people.

Down, Syndrome!

(I blame [this joke](http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/i6d96/my_dog_mitten_ate_two_shuttlecocks_this_morning/) for dredging this up from my memory)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ed Zachary Syndrome

A woman was distraught at the fact that she had not had a date or any sex in
quite some time. She was afraid she might have something wrong with her, so
she decided to seek the medical expertise of the well known Chinese sex
therapist, Dr. Chang.

Upon entering the examination roo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is suffering from restless leg syndrome

After countless unsuccessful medical treatments he becomes discouraged thinking he will never be able to enjoy a good night's sleep due to the overwhelming tingling sensations he experiences through his legs at night.

Having exhausted every other option, he decides to try his luck with a wit...

Why did the guy with Down's Syndrome enter an RV contest at a bagel shop?

He wanted to Winnebago.

My relationship with trading is a weird one. They are unstable, constantly deplete my money, give me mental trauma, but I carry on thinking about the good times I had with them, and the money they made for me.

Guess I have "Stock"holm syndrome

I had a hyper dog called Syndrome

Every time someone came round my house he used to jump around them. Then I have to say "Down Syndrome!"

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