Ebola Jokes

Because it can't be taken on empty stomach

The bartender says, “What is this, some kinda sick joke?”

Is it a virus or a free U2 album?

(for best results, read in the voice of your favorite late night host)

In Indiana, a pizza delivery man received a $1,200 tip from college students. College officials applauded the act of charity, until they realized the “pizza” was just a box with $1,200 dollars worth of weed in it.

T... read more

The Cowboys Stadium.

Because they can't catch anything there.

A man just back from a long trip through the tropics starts feeling very unwell. He goes to see his doctor, but passes out in the office and is rushed to hospital for tests.

The man wakes up alone in a private room, feeling awful, wondering what is happening to him. Soon, a phone by his bed r... read more

A doctor says grimly to a patient, "You are a very sick man. You've been diagnosed with covid, monkey pox, swine flu, Ebola, and bubonic plague all at the same time."

"Is there anything that can be done to help me?" asks the patient.

"Amazingly, there is," says the doctor. "First, we'... read more

...and only a handful of cases of herpes was Clinton's.

Eh... Nevermind. You probably won't get it.

Nine months later the Corolla virus is born.

He goes to see his doctor and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo a barrage of extensive tests. He's negative for COVID, Ebola, Malaria, and pretty much all the recognizable infectious diseases.


The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone... read more

He has no recollection of how he got there. While pondering his situation, his bedside phone rings, and he answers it.

A doctor on the other end identifies himself, and tells the man: "I have really bad news. You're very sick. After your collapse yesterday, we ordered several tests, and got... read more

Because less people got it.

They both make Thanksgiving dinner uncomfortable for everyone.

Trick question. There are no roads in Africa.

Suddenly all the hotties from Pfizer, Moderna, AstraZeneca, Janssen, Sinovac and Novavax surround Covid.

Ebola asks Sars, "Why is Covid getting all the attention?"

Sars replies, "This is what happens when you go viral."

It was contagious.

...does that mean it's gone viral?

...but when the time comes, I bet they're gonna be killer.

Unfortunately Chris Brown beat her.

The directions say the medication must be taken with food.

Ebola cereal

It was Hep C and Ebola sharing a Pepsi cola

You probably won't get it

Because 7 had Ebola.

A quarantinable Quentin Tarantino.

The CDC has confirmed that the recent Ebola outbreak is now the second disease in history to be known as the "black death".

...he spilled his guts to the cops.

They say ebola perfect game.

called Hyper-bola


I'm sorry :(

Knock knock
Who's there?
Ebola.
Ebola who?
Ebowl of cereal

Because he asked for 'ebola spaghetti'

Ebola.

Is there ANYTHING hipsters won't bring back!?

I clicked not now, because I thought it was some kind of virus.

reports are coming in that the Ebola virus has mutated and become exponentially worse, in light of this mutation the virus will be renamed the Hyperbola Virus

Before the internet was invented Ebola was just known as Bola

wakka wakka