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Guitars Jokes

Stealing guitars

Judge: It appears you were caught stealing guitars. Are you a first offender?

Defendant: No, it was a Gibson, then a fender.

Who makes the best acoustic guitars in the world? Martin! Martin who?

Martin, luthier king.

How many guitars does a guitarist need?

Just one more.

A woman is accused of attacking her husband with several of his guitars

The Judge asked "First time offender?"

She replied, "No, first time a Gibson, then a Fender."

I really like guitars

They just strike a chord with me

Did you hear about the European country ruled by small guitars?

I think it’s called Uke-reign.


(I came up with this I’m so proud of myself)

Did you hear about that crook that was stealing guitars from classic rock stars?

He was locked up for Petty thievery.

My friend asked me who was the first band to start smashing guitars.

Impressed, I told him he was right.

A local music shop is giving away free guitars!

No strings attached!

What do women and bass guitars have in common?

You have to slap them for people to think you're a good player

A woman is arrested for killing her guitar player husband

She is accused of bashing her husband's head in with his guitars because he never paid any attention to her.

In her first court appearance, the judge looks at the woman and asks: “First offender?"

The woman replies: “No. First it was a Gretsch, followed by a Gibson, and then a Fender."

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