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Electric Guitar Jokes

A woman was in court being sentenced for beating her husband to death with his electric guitars...

Judge: First offender?

Woman: No, first a Gibson, then a Fender.

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What do you call a metal statue of a virgin playing an electric guitar?

An iron maiden

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I’m bisexual and I play bass and electric guitar

I suppose I string both ways
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An Octopus in the Highlands

One lovely evening in the Scottish Highlands, a lad walked into a local pub with his octopus in tow. There was a general start in the otherwise subdued and cozy establishment. The lad takes a seat at the bar, props his octopus in the seat next to him, and proclaims for all to hear:

“I hereby ...

My neighbour knocked on my door at 3 in the morning.

Can you believe that, 3AM?!
Luckily for him, I was still up playing my electric guitar.

Guitar Horse

A horse and his mother are in the barn watching TV when an ad comes on. It's for a music school that can teach anyone to play any insturment, guaranteed. The horse has always wanted to be play the guitar, so he calls them up.

"Hey, I want to learn to play the guitar," he says, "Can you teach ...

There was once a billionaire philanthropist with a curious idea....

"What would happen if he gave modern musical instruments to tribal people who have never been in contact with the outer world? He decided to do just that, and to return after 10 years. The tribesmen were given an electric guitar, bass, a drum kit, digital keys, everything needed to make music with o...

Me, neighbor and cops are making a band

I play electric guitar, Cops are playing drums on the door and neighbor sings outside the window.

My friend was a pretty good guitarist

But that one time he stepped in a puddle while playing his electric guitar on an old, badly grounded amp, he became a great conductor.

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Magical guitar

Alex and John were talking and suddenly John saw an electric guitar in Alex room and said " Is that new?"
Alex said " yeah that new and its magical!"
John said "really! What's the magic?"
Alex said "whenever I play this guitar I get to know " what's the time."
John said "how?"
Alex sa...

A man wants to audition for a band...

The band has advertised that they're looking for a drummer. The man comes to the tryout, fully prepared with a truck full of instruments and his drum sticks. He waited in a long line to get through the door, and when it was finally his turn, he was ecstatic! The woman who was holding the tryouts ask...

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