UPJOKE
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Did you know that on the way to the Moon the Apollo 11 crew heard rock music coming from outside?

Mission Control confirmed they were passing through the Van Halen belts.

I searched up "rock music" on the interwebs the other day and got nothing.

I suppose it's because rocks don't usually sing.

My neighbor likes to make a big deal about how SOME people prefer listening to rock music that's made using only a guitars, drums, and vocals. At first I thought he was just an opinionated music listener but...

I'm starting to think he's a bassist.

What is Magneto's favourite rock music genre?

Heavy Metal

We found out the guy who plays rock music on his radio at work has ED

We call him Limp Bizkit

What day is the best for punk and rock music?

A green one apparently.

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I love organic rock music

My favorite band is the Almond Butters

The death count nears 50 after scaffolding collapses and crushes fans at a rock music festival...

Eye-witnesses say there was a lot of heavy metal.

Rock music and Cooking

Did you know the rock band Aerosmith wrote a Chinese cookbook?


It's called Wok This Way

These are dark times for rock music...

...We must band together!

What does rock music and my grandpa have in common?

The Strokes

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A horse is sitting in his stable one day when he hears music coming from the farmhouse. He waits patiently for the farmer to go out before making his way across to the farmhouse to see what's going on. As he peers through the window he can see MTV is on the television.

Horse goes into the house and sees a rock band on the screen. He is instantly taken by the guitar and decides there and then he wants to play. He uses the telephone and calls the local music shop. He explains that he has seen the band on TV, that he is a horse and that he wants to play guitar, The m...

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So I went to Japan on holiday,

and I had a very close online Japanese friend I met on a Guitar Hero forum, and we arranged to meet up.

I thought he was a guy, but then this really cute girl with short, brown hair shows up, easily a 9/10. She's called Nao and even though it's the first time we had met in real life, we get a...

i have a triangular-shaped pebble i use to strum my guitar

It's for rock music.

Roses are red, violet's are blue

When I listen to rock music.
My neighbours do too.

Found a stone shaped like a guitar pick at the beach yesterday...

It's for rock music

So the dude dies and gets to the Heaven's Gate...

... where St. Peter tells him that he didn't do anything particularly good or bad in life, so he actually gets to choose whether he goes to Hell or Heaven. He's even kind enough to offer him a tour to both places, so he has a better idea.

So first, he starts with Heaven. Which is really nice...

I was in a store doing looking at some stationary set

Suddenly I had an urge to let out a lot of gas. Thankfully the store was playing rock music very loudly. So I timed my farts according to the beat of the music. There was no way anyone could have heard me.
When I was done, I looked around and saw all the customers heads were turned to me.
...

A software salesman died and was greeted by St. Peter at the gate to heaven.

Upon examining the great book, St.Peter tells the salesman he has an equal number of good and bad things in his life’s history, so the choice of heaven or hell is his decision to make.

The salesman, hesitant to make such a momentous decision, asks if he can tour both places to assist him wit...

What kind of music are scissors afraid of?

Rock music

A man went into a music shop

A man went into a music shop looking for a new instrument.

The owner introduced him to a lot of different instruments: flutes, trumpets, drums and guitars but none of them caught the man's interest.

The man nearly gives up when he spots a saxophone hanging in the corner. He tries it an...

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