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Giraffes Jokes

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Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees?

Why don't you see elephants hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it.

Why do elephants paint their balls red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.

What's the loudest sound in the jungle?
Giraffes eating cherries

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

For my first cake day I want to share a joke my dad told me when I was probably too young to really understand it. How does an elephant hide in the jungle?

Climbs to the top of a cherry tree and paints his balls red.

What’s the loudest sound in the jungle?

Giraffes eating cherries!

(Apologies if you’ve heard it before fellow Redditors! Maybe by next cake day I’ll get better material)

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Fucking smug giraffes,

Always looking down on me.

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How many giraffes can you fit in a Volkswagen?

Four, 2 in the front and 2 in the back.


- How do you know if there's been a giraffe in your fridge?

There's a set of hoof prints in the butter.


- How do you know if there's been 2 giraffes in your fridge?

There's 2 sets of hoof prints in the butter.


- H...

Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin

And giraffes were born

You know, giraffes can grow up to 18 feet

but most of them only have 4

(OC) Why don't giraffes have stripes?

Because God took one look at them and said, "You know, that thing's so tall, it'll be easy to spot."

Friends are like giraffes...

...If you shoot them, they die.

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A joke my uncle told me a couple years ago.

A man opened a zoo and was attracting tourists from all over the world. The most popular exhibit was the giraffes, but every night, the giraffes would manage to escape their enclosures.

The zoo owner thought the giraffes jumped over the fence, so he raised the fence up to 2 metres tall. But t...

Why do giraffes have such long necks?

To get away from the smell of their feet.

Why people never believe giraffes?

Because they tell tall tales

You know why giraffes have long necks?

Because their heads are far from their body.

What do Giraffes eat?

Macaroni and leaves.

Never go to bars run by male giraffes.

They only serve highballs.

Man walks into a bar with a Giraffe

Sits down at a table and orders a round, whiskey for him and a double for the giraffe

This goes on for a few more rounds until the giraffe is all but passed out, laying across the table

Man stands up and starts to stagger to the exit.

Barman looks over and says "Hey - you can't...

What do giraffes paint?

Giraffiti

what do you call a group of Giraffes?

a Myth

Why are giraffes real but unicorns aren't?

What's more believable a horse with a horn or a leopard moose camel with a 40 foot neck?

Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes a long time for them to swallow their pride.

A giraffe walks into a bar

Giraffes aren’t good at playing limbo

What do you get when giraffes play Twister?

A necktie.

What do two giraffes have in common?

Neither can ride a bike

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A giraffe walks into a restaurant...

He asks the waiter, "Do you have any food specifically for giraffes?"

The waiter thinks for a second and comes back with a plate of spaghetti with the longest fork you've ever seen.

"Asshole!" the giraffe says, and he walks out.

The next day, a penguin walks into the restauran...

Where do you put Giraffes that don't feel good?

Giraffe-Sick Park

What do you call a zoo where all the giraffes have colds?

Giraffe Sick Park

A pirate, two giraffes, a duck and a nun walk into a bar..

The bartender says
"Is this some kind of joke?"

What do you get when 2 giraffes collide?

A giraffic jam

Why do giraffes have a great love life?

Because they keep a good distance between their brains and their heart.

What do Giraffes and zoning regulations have in common?

They both don't exist in Texas.

Did you know that a giraffes neck is strong enough to support the weight of a human climbing on it?

Anyway, I got banned from my local zoo today

What did the giraffe say to the conspiracy theorist?

Nothing, giraffes aren't real.

A giraffe walks into a Californian bar....

And says to the bartender "I'll have a bourbon and coke and 27 straws please, all joined together to make one large straw" the bartender, while perturbed, fulfills the giraffes order. Painstakingly joining all straws together.

The next day the giraffe comes back and orders the same. T...

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