The 40+ Best Llama Jokes

What do you call a stampeding herd of Llama?

THE ALPACALYPSE

What did the mama Llama say to the baby llama as they prepared for a picnic?

Alpaca lunch

What does an Italian Llama say?

Llama mia!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a llama that hoards anything and everything to be prepared?

An all-packa

Never date a llama that has kids

You don’t need the baby llama drama

What do llamas type when they are laughing?

Llamao

A Rabbit, a Monkey and a Llama walks into a bar.

The bartender looks at them, and goes:" I think you're ALL in the wrong joke."

The rabbit says :"Man this is worse than when I was just a typo."

The Dalai Lama is working with Peruvian engineers to move llamas more efficiently…

It’s the Dalai Lamas’ llama dolly.

I heard llamas are going to bring about the end of the world.

It's going to be Alpaca-lyptic.

A llama saw it self in the mirror

It was the spitting image

Whoops, almost forgot to bring my llamas

Alpaca pair

A llama walks into her house to see her husband in bed with another llama

After a moment of intense silence, the husband gets up and says, "alpaca my bags."

A polygamist lion walks into a bar with 3 of his wives: a giraffe, an ostrich and a llama.

He walks up to the bar and asks the rhino bartender to recommend a beer.

Rhino: "Sure, we have lots of great choices on tap."

Lion: "C'mon man... Can't you see I prefer longnecks?"

Why did Trump call for a ban on all llamas entering the US?

because he isllamaphobic

What did the llama said to the other llama?

¿Como se llama?

I brought my Arabic friend to the zoo to see Llamas for the first time.

Once we got near them I told him which of the animals was a Llama, and then asked if he thought they looked good.

He turned to me with a confused look on his face and said,

“We’ve been talking for a while, why did you just greet me again?”

Equally confused, I replied,

“...

Okay, Lama spelled with one 'L' is a holy man in Tibet. With two 'L's, a llama is a South American pack animal.

So, what is a three 'L' lama?

A big fire in Boston.

No one is afraid of llama kisses

So why is everyone so worried about the alpaca lips?

What do you call a skinny and malnourished llama?

Da'light' llama

Which sultry-voiced singer will happily spit in your face?

Llama Del Rey.

Dali llama walked into a pizza shop and said......

Can you make me one with everything?

A llama went on a trip

But he wanted to bring his brother Carl

Carl was excited and said, "Don't worry about food; alpaca lunch"

What does a llama do when it goes on holidays?

Alpaca ya bags.

Hey Llama, 90% of our friends don't find your puns funny.

Yeah, but at least pun intended?

What do Tibetans use to move their alpacas around?

Dolly Llamas

What do you call a toy alpaca that has obtained enlightenment?

The Dolly Llama

How do camels learn to mate ?

They read the Llama Sutra.

Alpaca my bags, I think.....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was head-butted by an animal in the Andes...

It was a blunt-force llama.

What happens when you make a Llama sing along to a song by the Cranberries?

You get a zombie alpacalips

A bunch of stoners were tasked with the job of inventing a new sport...

The result was just a bunch of misshapen llamas playing football.
When they asked the group of stoners why they decided this to be the new sport, they replied "we were just sitting there in silence for a long time and then someone said "alpaca bowl""

So I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck.

Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama

Did you guys hear about the pachyderm who earned a Rhodes Scholarship?

He’s an Oxford llama

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An alpaca and a llama walks into a bat...

And they both get bludgeoned to death. Thank you autocorrect for fucking up my joke.

Where do llamas go on vacation?

Alpacapuco

What did the male alpaca say to the female alpaca?

Como te llama

A group of movie producers are working on the next avengers/MCU movie

Producer 1: Does anyone have any ideas for the villain?

Producer 2: Ok, how about a 14 foot tall, flaming eye-ball, with poison swords for arms, who shoots lasers from his feet, and has a pet llama made of diamonds

Head producer: You’re over-thinking this, let’s just keep it low-key

Another one!

Two llamas were preparing to go on a trip, one asked "Did you pack Sunscreen yet?" the other responded with "No, but Alpaca few."

I found enlightenment after eating slices of a cold garlic sausage made from a breed of South American camelid

all thanks to the deli llama

Did you hear about the woman who moved to Peru?

She is such a llama queen.

Jack and his llama walked into a bar...

They ordered a drink and had a good time.

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