I heard llamas are going to bring about the end of the world.
It's going to be Alpaca-lyptic.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A llama was grazing in a field one day... (long)
... when another llama came over.
"Hello," said the first llama.
"Whatcha doing?" asked the second llama.
"Oh, you know, eating some grass. Care to join me?" replied the first llama.
"Oh, thank you," said the second. So now there were two llamas eating. Along came a third...
A llama went on a trip
But he wanted to bring his brother Carl
Carl was excited and said, "Don't worry about food; alpaca lunch"
No one is afraid of llama kisses
So why is everyone so worried about the alpaca lips?
Okay, Lama spelled with one 'L' is a holy man in Tibet. With two 'L's, a llama is a South American pack animal.
So, what is a three 'L' lama?
A big fire in Boston.
What do you get if you stand between two llamas?
What do you call a stampeding herd of Llama?
South American dad joke.
Son: "I'm going to take the herd of llamas up to the pasture in the mountains."
Mom: "Thats a really far walk, you're gonna get hungry."
Dad: "Dont worry, alpaca lunch for him."
What do Tibetans use to move their alpacas around?
What did the Llama say to his wife when she asked for a divorce?
Fine, guess Alpaca my things.
It’s funny because he was married to an Alpaca.
A llama saw it self in the mirror
It was the spitting image
A llama walks into her house to see her husband in bed with another llama
After a moment of intense silence, the husband gets up and says, "alpaca my bags."
Why did Trump call for a ban on all llamas entering the US?
because he isllamaphobic
I tried eating a whole llama once.
I couldn't finish it, so I figured "Eh, alpaca lunch for tomorrow."
Dali llama walked into a pizza shop and said......
Can you make me one with everything?
There is a hero that is a Llama
He is the best at fighting crimes, solving crimes and saving the day. However, a villain outsmarted him. He was faced with saving either Marley Dank or the Llama chick that he liked, he could only choose one to save. I guess you can say that he was having a dillama
What do you call a skinny and malnourished llama?
What did Mario say when he saw the Alpaca?
Don’t-a worry it’s a false-a llama!
How do the zookeepers wake the animals in the morning?
They set their a-llamas.
Hey Llama, 90% of our friends don't find your puns funny.
Yeah, but at least pun intended?
What did the llama said to the other llama?
¿Como se llama?
What happens when you make a Llama sing along to a song by the Cranberries?
You get a zombie alpacalips
What does a llama do when it goes on holidays?
Alpaca ya bags.
What do you call a religious animal that loves sandwiches?
The Deli Llama.
Where do llamas go on vacation?
What kind of health insurance does a llama need?
A bunch of stoners were tasked with the job of inventing a new sport...
The result was just a bunch of misshapen llamas playing football. When they asked the group of stoners why they decided this to be the new sport, they replied "we were just sitting there in silence for a long time and then someone said "alpaca bowl""
Which sultry-voiced singer will happily spit in your face?
Llama Del Rey.
Did you hear about the woman who moved to Peru?
She is such a llama queen.
I tried to phone the spiritual leader of Tibet once, but was sent a big goat with a long neck instead.
Turns out I had phoned Dial-a-Llama.
I found enlightenment after eating slices of a cold garlic sausage made from a breed of South American camelid
all thanks to the deli llama
Who looks like a alpaca and drops sick albums in 2017
Jack and his llama walked into a bar...
They ordered a drink and had a good time.