A wife accompanies her husband to a follow up appointment at his doctor.

Things go normally, but as they are about to leave the doctor asks if he can talk to her privately. The husband goes to the waiting room.

The doctor tells the woman, "I didn't want to scare him, but your husband has a very serious heart condition. As long as he is treated properly, he should ...

To follow up on the Java/C# joke...

Q: Why did the Java Developer quit his job?

A: Because he didn't get arrays.

How do you get milk from a cat?

Take away his saucer.


Follow up joke......

How do you get milk from a female cat?

Take away her saucer.

I had a friend in high school who was addicted to Baby Ruths...

He was psychologically programmed to always have a Baby Ruth candy bar with every meal of the day, along with multiple snacks in between. He's absolutely insistent that he can't stay sane without them, and I never bothered to question this strange addiction.

Years go by, we graduate and fall ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Some local comedians had just finished up a set at the local comedy club...

So naturally, they sat down at the bar and ordered a round. Now, these guys are pretty fucking funny, and they know every joke in the book. So as they're enjoying their beer, of course, they're cracking jokes with each other. But since they know them so well, they started just referring to them by t...

Remember when glaciers were cool?

That's all. What's a good follow up? It's a climate change joke. Idk.

What do you call an amputee trying to do karate?

Partial Arts.

Edit: It's been pointed out that the grammatical construction of this joke could have been better. How about: "What is it called when an amputee does karate? Partial Arts.

Edit edit: best follow up question: What's an amputee's favourite karate weapon? Nub chucks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Guy walks into a dr office complaining about a tennis elbow.

Dr- okay I need you to pee into a cup
Patient- why? It’s my EL-BOW!
Dr- ::sigh:: we have this new machine in back and all it needs is the patients urine and it will diagnose ANYthing. Will you just humor me?

The patient agrees, goes into the bathroom, produces a urine sample, hands the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A prostitute has a problem...

There once was a very prolific prostitute. She serviced many a John and a Jane over her career.

Her biggest insecurity was always the way her vagina looked. She had rather large pussy lips (labia minora). Occasionally, she would be rejected by a client because of the way her lady bits looked...

A man is at the doctor

A man is at a follow up appointment at the doctor. The doctor walks in and says “I’m sorry, but I’ve got bad news and worse news.”

“Start with the worse news,” says the man.

“You’ve got cancer,” the doctor starts.

Caught off guard, the man replies “okay, what’s the bad news?”<...

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