My wife suggested I get an erection enhancer .

So I did.

Her name is Tamy, shes a 21 yr old dancer

A captain enhances his soldiers' spirit before going to battle

He asks Ryan first

\- What is America, you?

\- It is my mother, and I love it more than anything.

\- What would you do for her?

\- I would sacrifice myself, if necessary.

Pleased, he asks Forrest

\- And you, do you love America, soldier?

\- Yes, but ...

What do you call a potion of enhanced punching?

Imbibe Check

So, I heard Bounty, the maker of paper towels, has decided to get into the Male Enhancement business...

..their new slogan? The Quicker Pecker Upper.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Surgery can now provide you with the attributes of animals as body enhancements, such as gorilla arms for strength.

A complaint was filed, however, when a man got an elephant trunk to replace his penis:

"It's great and all but now I can't hang out with my friends much at taverns cuz while we're seated the trunk grabs some peanuts from the bar and sticks them in my asshole."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I heard that heroin works as a male enhancement.

But I think that's poppycock.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A plastic surgeon and a tattoo artist made a deal, where the surgeon did a breast enhancement operation for free for the tattoo artist, and in return she promised to tattoo the surgeon for free

Tit for tat

Time for a good old Soviet era joke

(should be read in a heavy Russian accent, any grammatical errors are here to enhance the joke)

Old granny working for years already in factory who make Samovar. But old granny only is normal worker not member of nomenclatura so never earn enough money to also buy Samovar herself. Old granny ...

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I ordered a male enhancement off eBay.

They sent me a magnifying glass.

Who’s your favourite Canadian music icon that also practices advanced culinary technique which enhances the flavour of poultry at the atomic level?

Brine Atoms

If you lose one sense your other senses are enhanced

That explains why people with no sense of humour have a heightened sense of self importance

When people lose one sense, other senses usually get enhanced.

That is why individuals with no sense of Humor
have increased sense of self-importance and narcissism.

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Someone bet me a car that I wouldn't get belly button enhancement surgery.

I just got me an Audi.

What do astronauts use to enhance their performance?

Asteroids

Did you hear about the time Jesus overdosed on male enhancement drugs?

He was hung for three days and then he died.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Trump is suing Male enhancement giant Viagra..

He says it's a rigged erection

Stupid Overcomplicated euphemism jokes

1.

I’m a transaction manager for a multibillion dollar corporation

I work as a McDonald’s cashier

2.

“Mom there is a burglar in here”

“No kid I’m just an asset reallocation specialist”

3.

“So what do you do for a living?”

“I travel and driv...

I could argue that someone passing out in the punchline enhances the joke,

but that would be faint praise indeed.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Restaurant Productivity Enhancer

A man gets seated at a restaurant and accidentally knocks a spoon off his table. A waiter immediately rushes over, pulls out a spoon from his breast pocket and places it on the table. The man is impressed: "Do you always carry a spoon in your pocket?" The waiter replies, "Yes. Management conducted a...

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A man goes to the doctor to inquire about male enhancement.

"Doc," said he, "I'm tiny. I can't satisfy my wife, and I'm ridiculed in changing rooms. I've tried every drug and herbal supplement, to no avail. I want to look into surgery."

"Well," said the doctor, peering at the man's twig-like member through a magnifying glass, "You're in luck. there's ...

Five most popular enhanced interrogation techniques..

.. The fourth one will shock you!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It is odd, isn't it, that to get rid of penis enhancement emails ..

.. I have to send them to the Junk box.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Penis study

For whatever reason, Saudi Arabia decided to fund a study to find out why the penis had the shape it does. Specifically the larger head at the end. After a significant investment and several months, Saudi Arabia conclude that it was to enhance the mans pleasure.

Due to ongoing tensions, Canad...

Mary Poppins Decided To Grow Some Vegetables

Mary Poppins decides to grow some vegetables. When she picks her crop in the autumn, her carrots, potatoes, onions, and spring beans have all failed, but her cauliflowers have grown a treat.

She picks them, cooks some for Sunday lunch in a cheese sauce, and they taste wonderful.

After ...

A Student is in Engineering Class, when the Teacher asks What is a Machine?

Student 1: A machine is anything that reduces human effort

Teacher: Will you please elaborate?

Student 1: Anything that simplifies work, or saves time, is a machine

Teacher: What is the true definition?

Student 2: Sir, machines are any combination of bodies so connected t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

And older man marries a beautiful younger woman, but has trouble getting it up.

So he goes to his doctor to see if there's anything that can help. The man is worried about taking drugs to help his ED, so the doctor tells him, "Well, there's an experimental surgery where we graft on a muscle from an elephant's trunk." The man gets very excited about this, and they proceed with t...

Did you hear they're remaking the show, 6 Million Dollar Man?

It used to be about an enhanced human. Now it's just a story about a guy who visits the ER without health insurance.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

GM and Microsoft

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we w...

So farmer Bob had a rivalry with farmer Jim.

They were both cattle farmers but Jim's herd was much larger and fatter, and his meat went for much more money. So bob started looking for a way to bulk up his cows. He started experimenting. Eventually he discovered that feeding them marijuana made them grow exponentially, while also making them mo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What type of candy do you buy for...

What type of candy do you buy for a comedian?

...Snickers

What type of candy do you buy for a happy horse owner?

...Jolly Rancher

What type of candy do you buy for a rap star?

...M&Ms

What type of candy do you buy for a divorced wife with no prenup?
<...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apple iBoob

Given the recent slowdown in iPhone sales, Apple announced today that it will skip the wearables market and develop a line of digital implants for adults. The first product, shipping in the summer of 2016, is a breast enhancement device that can store and play music. The new Apple iBoobs, sold in pa...

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Boob Job

What do you call the space between a woman's enhanced breasts?
Ans: Silicon Valley.

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