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Featuring Jokes

Fun movie fact: Did you know that the movie "Speed" featuring Keanu had no director?

Because if it had direction, then the movie would be called "Velocity"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Another Jewish joke (this one featuring boobs!) (NSFW)

My Jewish father showed me this one.

So a small Jewish man happens to come across a rather stunning woman. Specifically, this woman has the most beautiful, perfect breasts he's ever seen in his life.

So he approaches this woman and says with utmost sincerity:

"Ma'am, I'm sorry t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A pianist was hired to play background music for a movie. When it was completed he asked when and where he could see the picture. The producer sheepishly confessed that it was actually a porn film and it was due out in a month.

A month later, the musician went to a porn theatre to see the adult movie.
With his collar up and dark glasses on, he took a seat in the back row of the adult cinema, next to a couple who also seemed to be in disguise.
The movie was even raunchier than he had feared, featuring group sex, S/M, ...

What concert only costs 45 cents?

50 Cent featuring Nickleback

I'm starting a mail order bride service featuring women from around the world who have an STD.

Amnasty International.

I'm releasing a new line of sleep aids featuring melatonin-infused almonds, cashews, and pistachios.

They're called Doze Nuts.

I keep hearing about this great new MCU show featuring what I can only assume are Hispanic superheroes...

but I can't seem to find this *Juan Division* on any streaming service.

If you like posts featuring Norse gods,

then this could be your Loki day.

I saw a commercial for a new horror movie featuring a clown...

...And said to myself "that's IT?"

So they're coming out with a new $10 bill featuring a woman.

But it's only worth $7.70.

I just bought an art piece featuring several Pikachus playing Texas Hold'em.

It's called Pokermon.

I'm writing an erotic novel featuring tea and pastries.

I'm calling it "Romancing the Scone."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you want to be when you grow up? Featuring Lil Johnny

A teacher asks her class, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Little Johnny says "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe...

There's an upcoming show featuring the woman from Tiger King and Batman's sidekick, going around and reviewing ice cream parlors

Carole Baskin And Robin's

Lately my comment karma has been so good, Reddit sent me an award featuring a colorful lizard.

It's a comment karma chameleon.

The Notorious B.I.G. once hosted a house party featuring a giant fortune teller

It was a large medium at Small's.

What do you call a party featuring John Adams, Alexander Hamilton and co as guests?

A feds era list party.

"My name is Bennett, and I’m addicted to Star Trek: The Next Generation episodes featuring the omnipotent alien played by John de Lancie." "HI BENNETT."

Another depressing Q-Anon meeting.

Give me your best jokes regarding or featuring animals.

For science.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man with a tendency to over-explain things lays on his therapist's couch.

The therapist says “I have a new exercise for you today. Instead of spending an hour talking about your day, try to tell me the essentials of what happened in one breath.”
The patient agrees and takes a deep breath

“So they cast Callie Hernandez as Supergirl and I’m not sure if it was th...

Marvel is working on a Spiderman reboot for Greek audiences

Featuring the adventures of Pita Parker

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