This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The virgin bride

A nice Italian girl got married. The had their honeymoon in the brides parents house. When the time came for bed, they went upstairs to her room. The groom proceeded to take off his coat and shirt. He was extremely hairy.

The bride rushed from the room and down to her mother.

"Ma...

A man goes to a wedding

And they celebrate as normal until the reception. When he enters the tents, he sees several queues. He sees one to take a picture with the bride and groom, one to throw something at the Mother-in-law, one to pin the dress on the bridesmaid-or if you’re lucky, unpin-, one to request music, one to dan...

Why do brides cry at the wedding ?

Because they never marry the best man !

What do polish brides get on the wedding night that's long and hard ?

A new last name !

Why do brides always dress in white?

Because home appliances usually come that way.

Wembley Tickets- England v Scotland Friday 18th June 2021 Kick off 8pm

One of my best friends has two spare tickets in a corporate box for the England v Scotland game. They were £300 each but he didn't realise they are on the same day as his Covid 19 postponed wedding.

If you are interested he is looking for someone to take his place!

It is at Manchester...

Why are Asian brides always so satisfied?

Because when ever you eat Chinese you're always hungry an hour later.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do brides smile so much at the wedding ?

No more blow jobs.

A farmer had ordered a mail order bride

She arrived by train in the nearest town, so he strapped his horse to his carriage and went to pick her up.

On the way back, the horse stumbles on one leg, and the farmer loudly says "That's one!"

After a little while more, the horse once again stumbles, and the farmer loudly says "Tha...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why do brides smile as they walk down the wedding aisle?

They realise that they've given their last blowjobs.

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