UPJOKE
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Two bakers were trying to have a talk about leavened Indian breads...

The topic was a naan-starter.

A politician dies

So a politician dies and ends up standing in front of the pearly gates. Saint Peter looks at him for a second, flicks through his book, and finds his name.


"So, you're a politician..." "Well, yes, is that a problem?" "Oh no, no problem. But we've recently adopted a new system for people...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sex is like garlic bread

Sometimes you can't get enough of it but nobody wants to be woken up at 3am for either.

I met this really short man called Peter the other day. He's a baker and he was telling me all about baking flat breads...

It was fascinating....

I love the pitta patter of tiny Pete.

What do breads do at the dinner table?

Toast

Maybe we shouldn’t be eating those little flat breads during communion

... since they haven’t risen yet.

What do breads do when they read a good post on r/jokes?

They repost.

Haha you thought i was gonna say "loaf".

What does burnt breads, soldiers dying, and pregnant women have in common!

Pulling out too late.

Why can't I take pickle-flavored breads to the church picnic?

Because it's made from dill doughs!

What do get when you mix two breads?

A hy-bread

What is a German breads favourite game?

Gluten tag

A Viking is out shopping when he comes across an old woman in a wheelchair crying.

"What's wrong?" asks the Viking.

"Well," the woman says, wiping her tears, "I have been living on my own for many months now, and my daughter and son-in-law have at last come to visit me. My daughter has brought me along on this shopping trip, but it's the first time I've really been out and ...

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