How did Alice feel when her doctor told her she is genetically more likely to develop a yeast infection?

Thrush-traited

What do you call a 300 pound woman with a yeast infection?

A Whopper with cheese.

Why is yeast a popular microorganism?

Because he's a fun-guy

Flour, sugar, salt, water and yeast grew up together in jail.

Guess you could say they were bread in captivity.

Why does Yeast have 7 toes?

Because it is in bread.

News: A Major Fashion Label Releases a Cream for Yeast Infections

It's called "Gucci Coochie Goo".

My Jewish neighbor has been moving huge bags of yeast and empty kegs with weird symbols into his garage.

Turns out Hebrews

What happens when a guy gets a yeast infection?

He can't rise

What do yeast and people from Alabama have in common?

Both are in bread.

Why did the rich man sell yeast?

To raise some dough.

A mother called the doctor about her teenage daughter. "She refuses to eat anything but yeast and car wax. Now she's lying in bed asleep and I can't wake her. What should I do?" "There's nothing to worry about." said the doctor,

"she'll rise and shine soon enough..."

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Ralph, the department store parrot

During its hayday, Goldfinches was a glorious department store, with gorgeous decorations, including a Aviary centerpiece, where Ralph held court. You see, Ralph had a special ability to detect what people wanted by their appearance, and he would tell them where to look for the thing they needed....

What do you call a cabbage patch doll with a yeast infection?

Saurkrout

Yeast judge:

All rise

What does a redneck and yeast have in common?

They are both "in-bread"

Downvote me to hell if you want. This is my only joke.

What should one do to rise and shine every morning?

Eat yeast and shoe polish.

Having a baby in the south is like yeast...

Y'know, cause it's in-bread.

Did you hear about the pregnant redhead with a yeast infection?

She just gave birth to a healthy baby gingerbread man.

He has risen

A baker who's never been to church before decides to attend Easter service, during the sacrament the pastor describes how the bread is the body of christ, latter as the Easter story is told the whole congregation stands up and yells "he has risen", the Baker taken by surprise and not really sure wha...

If Corona virus is just a beer virus..

Then itโ€™s just a yeast infection!

Bread is a lot like the sun

It rises in the yeast and sets in the waist

Me and my sisters are baking bread for our sick grandmother. Iโ€™m the one responsible for making sure the bread rises but hey,

itโ€™s the yeast I can do.

Bread puns happened when you

Yeast expect them

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Doughboy?

A fatass bitch with a yeast infection.

What's the difference between a sneaky pig and yeast infection?

One's a cunning runt...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

Why did god give women yeast infections?

He wanted them to know what it was like to live with an irritated cunt

So there was this Baker who did a favor for his friend. The friend said "thank you very much, I really appreciate it." The baker replied.

"It's not a problem, it's the yeast I could dough."

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus and a yeast infection?

An itchy, twitchy twat.

This girl with a yeast infection walks into a bar

She sits down to order a drink and the bartender walks over and says " what's with the sour puss? "

My mum fed me yeast and put me in the oven.

Just how I was raised.

What do hillbillies and yeast have in common?

They're both in bred

I started using kosher yeast in all my baking

Now my bread rises 3 days later

What do yeast and a redneck have in common?

They're both usually found with beer and inbred.

-&y (written by moi)

A chef accidentally put yeast in his broth

The result was soup rising

I have a hardcore yeast affection.

I love breads and doughs.

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

NSFW A guy and a girl are fooling around...

A young man and a young woman are fooling around when the young woman starts to feel a little more kinky than usual and asks the guy to use his toe on her. The young man shrugs and decides, Why not? and then proceeds to pleasure his girlfriend with his big toe.

The next day the young man wak...

This joke may contain profanity. ๐Ÿค”

3 operating systems walk into a bar

The first says "I'm Windows. The most popular, everyone likes me and I don't mess about. I'll have a pint of lager."

The second says "I'm Mac OS. I'm the favourite of artists and hipsters, and I could never settle for a boring lager like Windows. Give me your hoppiest artisanal IPA!"

T...

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