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Cereal Jokes

Fruit Loops is putting marshmallows in their cereal like Lucky Charms

I guess Toucan play that game

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you get when you cross a diaper and some cereal?

Snap, crackle poop.

(This is my 8 yr olds favorite joke and she wanted me to make sure everyone on that joke website I go to knew it.)

What brand of cereal is the strongest??

Mini Wheats, because they’re shredded.

What cereal does Spider-Man hate the most?

Mystery O's

They should make a breakfast cereal exclusively for lumberjacks

They can call it morning wood

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Which is the number 1 cereal brand in Asgard?

Bifrosties

*holy shit almost crapped my pants with excitement when I came up with this. GF not as excited, I'm counting on you guys

A Cheerio sat at the bottom of a box of cereal,

but he longed to get to the top of the box. He had heard at the top of the box, there was a huge party, and he wanted to be a part of it.

So one day, he began climbing. He climbed over the other Cheerios, and gradually got his way up the box.

It took a lot of trying and determination, ...

I wish my cereal didn't get soggy so fast.

But Life is often disappointing.

Why does Joey eat his cereal with water?

Cause his dad never came back with the milk.

When I was at the grocery store, I asked an employee where the cereal was, and he said, "I'll see." And walks off. 5 minutes later, I asked another employee about the cereal, and he too said, "I'll see," and walks off.

I eventually found it myself. It was in aisle C.

Didn't that actress from Legally Blonde once eat cereal with a fork?

No wait- she ate Reese With a spoon

When I was younger, I thought I was clever by coming up with a joke: What is a British person's favourite cereal?

Cheerios!

I told this to joke to a British person.

They were a little tea'd off.

What is Gepetto's favorite cereal?

I know you think it's Pinnochi-o's, but it's actually Cheerios. They're whittle o's. Though I guess both woodwork.

Cereal first or milk first?

Neither. Bowl first.

I asked Sinatra what his favorite cereal was, an you know what he said?

That’s Life

What kind of cereal does Ronda Rousey eat?

Kix

what's a zombie's favorite cereal?

Brain Flakes

Never pour cereal down the loo.

It Kellogg's up your toilet.

What does German cereal say when it sees the milk in the morning?

Gluten-tag

what is an English teachers favorite cereal?

Synonym toast crunch

I had to start hiding cereal in my clothes so that my siblings couldn’t eat all of it.

I have Trix up my sleeve.

Whats a cat's favorite cereal??

Mice Crispies

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two blokes were on a plane one day.......

........ and they were sitting side by side. Coincidentally, they each had one black eye. They started talking.. 'hey mate do you mind if I ask how you got your black eye?'. 'Yeah no worries', the other one responded. 'I was at the airport check in and when I got to the counter, I couldn't help but ...

I stepped on a cereal once

Now iam a cereal killer

Why can’t the Minnesota Vikings eat cereal for breakfast?

They choke when they get too close to a bowl.

What was Stockton Rush's favorite cereal?

Cap'n Crunch

my family is like a box of cereal

Those who aren't nuts or fruits are flakes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An Australian Army Recruit sends home a letter...

Dear Ma & Pa,

I am well. Hope youse are too. Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that the Army is better than workin’ on the farm - tell them to get in quick smart before the jobs are all gone! I wuz a bit slow in settling down at first, because ya don’t hafta get outta bed until 6 am. But...

Did you see the Catholic church released a breakfast cereal?

Cinnamon Pope Crunch: The See You Can Taste

I got banned from /r/Jokes for posting, "Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms! Frosted Flakes! Cheerios! Lucky Charms!"

Mods said I'm a cereal reposter...

A boy asks his father what makes his cereal so good.

Boy: Hey dad, what makes my honey nut cheerios so delicious?

Dad: Bees Nuts.

Hey Dad, you hear the one about the illegitimate cereal?

Snap, Crackle, and no Pop.

(I got that from this '70's movie)

Just went to the store and bought milk, cereal, juice and ice cream.

Cashier: “You must be single, right?”

Me: “Yes! How did you know?”

Cashier: “Because you’re ugly.”

What is the number 2 cereal on Asgard?

Loki Charms

What's Hodor's favorite breakfast cereal?

Raisin Bran.

Why is there always dust at the bottom of a bag of cereal?

It's a sign Thanos has ensured you get a "balanced" breakfast.

What do you call someone who puts milk before cereal?

A cereal killer

What's Chris Brown's favorite cereal?

Honey Smacks

Did you hear the rumor about the cereal factory takeover?

Take it with a grain assault.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little Johnny comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores. "Not yet," said Little Johnny..

His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.

He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs and he kicks a pig.

He goes back in for breakfast and his mothe...

what do zombie cereal mascots say?

graaaiiiins

I just made a bran cereal with edibles in it

High 'n Fibre

A mother comes down to the kitchen and finds her daughter up early, eating a bowl of cereal...

The daughter asks- “Mommy, I heard some strange sounds coming from your bedroom a little while ago. What were you and Daddy doing in there?”

The mother is instantly embarrassed.

“Um... your daddy and I were making a cake, sweetheart.”

The next morning the mom comes down and t...

What's the happiest cereal?

Cheery o's

Which breakfast cereal provokes a woman's wrath?

Scorn Pops

I should've known better than to sign a contract that was written on the side of a cereal box.

Turns out the thing was filled with loopholes

What breakfast cereal do they serve at the Swiss clinic, Dignitas?

Cheerios!

My boss at the cereal factory pulled me into his office...

“I like your recipes son, but I think we should make some changes.”

“Ok”, I said, “Like What?”

“Well, first I’d like to dip it in sucrose. Then, I’d like to dust it with dextrose -“

“Stop right there”, I said. “No need to sugar coat it.”

A small chunk of cereal made its way to his best friend

"I'm going to get married!" said the cereal

"Whoa, thats cool!" said his friend, "But I gotta warn you... its hard for cereal to maintain their marriage."

"Why is that?"

"Well, it seems like you've got this in the bag, but it always, my dear friend, always breaks down."

Dr Ian Malcolm isn't sure how to fit his favorite cereal in the grocery cart

But Life finds a way

What is Bill Cosby’s favorite Peter Pan themed cereal?

Roofie-Os

What do you call someone who touches cereal inappropriately?

A chex offender

What is the night king’s favourite cereal

All-bran

What does cereal say when it leaves the room?

Cheerio

Kelloggs once had a cereal called 'Snatch'

You open it up, dump out the cereal and eat the box.

*Opens box of cereal*

We've updated our privacy policy.

People get so heated up about if the milk comes first in tea or cereal

Personally i prefer to put the tea in first, then the milk, then the cereal.

What do you call a group of cereal boxes that never keep their word?

Corn flakes

There's a guy sneaking around in grocery stores in my town dropping chunks of dry ice in boxes of cereal.

We're being attacked by a cereal chiller!

: As told by my 5 year old.

What do you call a cereal box full of snakes?

Honey Bunches of nopes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

gluten free cereal.

I want to make a gluten free cereal and name it "NO FUCKING WHEY!"

Why is cereal Thanos’s favorite food?

Because it’s part of a balanced breakfast!

My kids love Life cereal. I told them there's a grown-up version called That's Just Life

Each box of it is expensive, mostly empty & doesn't taste very good.

Why didn't the snowman eat his cereal?

Because he was already feeling a little flaky.

I heard that life made a new lemon cream flavored cereal

When life gives you lemons.

With all the attention on preparing unusual foods in the smoker (hikory smoked mustard, maple smoked ice cream, etc.) I thought up a great idea for a smoked breakfast cereal.

We'll call them "Mesquite O's" the cereal with a bite! They'll leave you itching for more!

Do you think we can stir up some buzz about it?

What do you call a racist cereal?

Special KKK

Why did the Xbox One eat its cereal for breakfast, but not its pancakes?

It had the spoon, but not the 4k.

Did you hear about the new breakfast cereal, Prostituties?

It doesn't go Snap, Crackle, Pop. It just lays there and Bangs.

What do cannibals drink with their breakfast cereal?

A cup of Joe.

You can use a cereal box to see the solar eclipse,

But can they see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?

A 106-year-old cowboy in Texas recently passed away.

He was asked on his last birthday earlier this year his secret to longevity.

He told them that for the past 50 years he had sprinkled a little gunpowder on his cereal each morning.

He left behind 8 children, 21 grandchildren, 32 great-grandchildren, and a 15-foot hole in the crematori...

I opened a pack of cereal and snorted it

I got high on Life

Life cereal uses false advertising...

I poured it on my grandma and she still didn't wake up.

What’s a band conductor’s favorite cereal?

Flute loops.

What type of cereal goes to the gym twice a day?

Shredded wheat.

I wish I could pin this joke on a 4-year-old, I'm so sorry

What do you call an online game about cereal?

Cheer.io

I hate cereal killers

they go against the grain

What’s the most popular breakfast cereal in Saudi Arabia?

Fruties Pebbled

If Drake owned a breakfast cereal franchise, what would it be called?

OV O's!

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