Opens box of cereal...

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What do you call someone who touches cereal inappropriately?

A chex offender

I should've known better than to sign a contract that was written on the side of a cereal box.

Turns out the thing was filled with loopholes

What do you call a person who kills cereal?

Mentally ill.

How did Reese eat her cereal?


What does German cereal say when it sees the milk in the morning?


People get so heated up about if the milk comes first in tea or cereal

Personally i prefer to put the tea in first, then the milk, then the cereal.

What’s the most popular breakfast cereal in Saudi Arabia?

Fruties Pebbled

What is the night king’s favourite cereal


My kids love Life cereal. I told them there's a grown-up version called That's Just Life

Each box of it is expensive, mostly empty & doesn't taste very good.

What's Hodor's favorite breakfast cereal?

Raisin Bran.

What does cereal say when it leaves the room?


What do you call a group of cereal boxes that never keep their word?

Corn flakes

Never pour cereal down the loo.

It Kellogg's up your toilet.

There was a boy playing in the farm field when his mom called him in for breakfast. On his way in he kicked a cow, a pig, and a chicken. So when he gets to the table he sees a dry bowl of cereal. "What's the deal?" he asks.

His mom says " You kicked the cow so no milk for you, you kicked the pig so no bacon for you, and you kicked the chicken so no eggs for you."

Then his father walks into the kitchen and accidentally kicks the cat.

The boy says "Will you tell him, or should I ?"

What's Chris Brown's favorite cereal?

Honey Smacks

Why didn't the snowman eat his cereal?

Because he was already feeling a little flaky.

What do cannibals drink with their breakfast cereal?

A cup of Joe.

My wife said that she’s leaving me because of my obsession with breakfast cereals.

I said, “Ok. Cheerios then.”

There's a guy sneaking around in grocery stores in my town dropping chunks of dry ice in boxes of cereal.

We're being attacked by a cereal chiller!

: As told by my 5 year old.

Why is there always dust at the bottom of a bag of cereal?

It's a sign Thanos has ensured you get a "balanced" breakfast.

Why did House Stark shut down the northernmost cereal factory in the Seven Kingdoms?

Cuz they were bad at Raisin’ Bran

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔


A 3 year old and a 5 year old play in their bedroom when their mother calls "Boys, time for breakfast!" and the 5 year old says "You know what? I think we're old enough to swear", the 3 year old nods his head. "I'll swear first and then you" the boy nods again. They come down and sit at the table, m...

I was preparing a bowl of cereal, finished 1 box of raisin bran and started another to fill my bowl. I was alarmed to see a different colored cereal;

Then I realized, they were different brans

this is a tru experience that just happened to me

What do you call a cereal box full of snakes?

Honey Bunches of nopes

With all the attention on preparing unusual foods in the smoker (hikory smoked mustard, maple smoked ice cream, etc.) I thought up a great idea for a smoked breakfast cereal.

We'll call them "Mesquite O's" the cereal with a bite! They'll leave you itching for more!

Do you think we can stir up some buzz about it?

Why did Neo have to eat his cereal with a fork?

Cos there is no spoon

California is like a box of cereal...

When you get rid of all the fruits and nuts, all that's left are the flakes.

What’s a band conductor’s favorite cereal?

Flute loops.

You can use a cereal box to see the solar eclipse,

But can they see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch?

A mother comes down to the kitchen and finds her daughter up early, eating a bowl of cereal...

The daughter asks- “Mommy, I heard some strange sounds coming from your bedroom a little while ago. What were you and Daddy doing in there?”

The mother is instantly embarrassed.

“Um... your daddy and I were making a cake, sweetheart.”

The next morning the mom comes down and t...

Saying Donald Trump is the same color as Kellogg's corn cereal is

flake news

Why don't the Minnesota Vikings eat cereal?

Every time they get close to the bowl, they choke!

What's a thesaurus's favorite cereal?

Synonym Toast Crunch

What kind of cereal does Ronda Rousey eat?


What do you call a racist cereal?

Special KKK

I opened a pack of cereal and snorted it

I got high on Life

Why did the Xbox One eat its cereal for breakfast, but not its pancakes?

It had the spoon, but not the 4k.

Life cereal uses false advertising...

I poured it on my grandma and she still didn't wake up.

What type of cereal goes to the gym twice a day?

Shredded wheat.

I wish I could pin this joke on a 4-year-old, I'm so sorry

What do you call an online game about cereal?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

gluten free cereal.

I want to make a gluten free cereal and name it "NO FUCKING WHEY!"

I'd rather buy a box of cereal than an iPhone 7

Because you can have apples with jacks

What were the founding father's favorite cereals?

Chex and Balance

I treat my women like I treat my cereal

Spoon first to get it wet, then eat it.

P.S. I love fat chicks.

If Drake owned a breakfast cereal franchise, what would it be called?

OV O's!

What cereal was removed from Tim Cook's breakfast?

Apple Jacks

Whats an ex-iphone user's favorite cereal?

Apple Jacks

What's an Android developer's favourite cereal?

Boot Loops

If you eat the prize from a cereal box..

does that make you a specially marked box?

source: soos says some words

So there's a box of cheerios...

Inside the box of cereal, it's like a cereal city, and there are three layers:

1. The top layer - this is the best place for the cheerios to live. All the best houses, the best cars, the best restaurants, etc, are in this part of the box. The ritziest cheerios live here, and everything is ex...

What kind of cereal does Microsoft make?

Wind O's

I hate cereal killers

they go against the grain

Did you hear about the guy whose bank closed his account because he dropped his bowl of cereal?

All his Chex bounced.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the guy who kept fucking cheerios?

He was a cereal rapist

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Cereal Anyone?

Two young brothers are talking. The older brother says, "You know what younger brother? I'm tired of being treated like a kid, so I'm going to take up swearing. The first thing tomorrow I'm going to say 'hell'."

The younger brother always goes along with his older sibling and does not li...

What type of milk does Mitt Romney use with his cereal?

The one percent

What's an English teacher's favourite cereal?

Synonym Grahams

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