My girlfriend broke up with me since I made too many bowling jokes.

I guess they just weren't up her alley.


God she's such a pinhead.

Have you ever heard of the Bowling Ball Killer?

He waits till he sees a group of people standing in a perfect bowling pin formation and then that's when he strikes. Very disturbing.

(not mine, but my partner's joke)

What do bowling and vegetables have in common?

A spare I guess

That's not a bowling ball, dad.

This weekend me and my dad were out bowling, you see. He gets his shoes on, and picks his ball from the rack. A nice, shiny, pinkish purple ball. He throws it down the lane, and we can't find it. The thing is gone. We look for at least an hour for this ball, but it's vanished. In the car on the way ...

Two bowling teams, one made up of all blondes and the other one of all brunettes...

reserve a double-decker bus for a weekend tournament.

The brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus and the blonde team rides on the top level.

The brunette team down below is whooping it up and having a great time when one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blond...

What's the Chinese minister for bowling sport's name?

Bo Ling

What's the Korean minister for bowling sport's name?

Bo Ling-Pin.

Whats the difference between a woman and a bowling ball

You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball

I'm starting a business that is half bowling alley and half safe injection site.

It's going to be called "Pins & Needles".

I got kicked off my bowling team the other day

I managed to knock all the pins down on my first two turns. Then on my third turn I did it again and the leader of the team turned to me and said "Sorry, you're going to have to leave the team".

Apparently they have a three strike policy.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Low wage workers play basketball. Tradesmen go bowling. Middle managers play softball. Upper managers play tennis. CEOs play golf.

The lesson: the higher you climb, the smaller your balls get.

why are the french so good at bowling

they always strike

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Bob works hard and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym.

His wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Bob! How ya doin?" His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before. "Oh no," says Bob. "He's on my bowling team."

W...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man's wife asks him to go to the store to buy some cigarettes.

So he walks down to the nearby store only to find that it's closed. He goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine. While at the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers together, and then one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartmen...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a bowling ball?

I don’t have a freezer full of bowling balls in my basement.

After winning the game, I threw the ball into the crowd just like they do on TV.

Apparently that's unacceptable in bowling.

What did Voldemort say to Peter Pettigrew when they went bowling?

“*Kill the spare.*”

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Me and my trans male buddy decided to form a bowling team.

We’re calling ourselves “2 Men 2 Balls 1 Goal.”

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My girlfriend loves cats and wanted to go to a bowling alley today. So I took her out to Racks and Balls Bowling Alley & Strip Club

There might not be cats... but there will be pussy.

A group of three successful bowlers traveled to every bowling alley in their county, talking trash at every alley and winning every game. Finally, the owner of an old ma and pa bowling alley had enough and invited them to a secret underground alley.

The old owner explained the rules to a new type of bowling.


"You place the ball at your feet, and then control the ball with your voice"


"That preposterous" said one of the bowlers.


"No, said the old owner, the acoustics in this room are so finely att...

Your mom is like a bowling ball.

She's round, heavy, gets picked up, fingered in three holes, tossed in the gutter and she still comes back for more.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

I was lucky enough to win a couple of coupons for some cool bowling balls with number jokes printed on them.

I won two, three for five, sick "seven ate nine" ten pin bowling balls.

Or in other words I... 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...pin bowling balls.

My wife asked me: "Shall we go bowling or stay cozy home."

I replied: " I am sick of putting my fingers in holes that everyone has touched with their sweaty hands. Let's go bowling!"

The owner of the local bowling alley decides to divorce his wife

now he has to pay her alley-money

I went bowling with my daughter.

Next time I'll just use a bowling ball.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Q: What's the difference between a Nazi and a bowling ball?

A: You can't stab a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

It was my son's birthday, so I took 4 of his mates for a burger and then bowling.

They had a great time, he would have loved it

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Whenever I go bowling....

I enter my name as "3 testicles".

That way, occasionally the monitor says "Congratulations 3 testicles! You got a spare!"

Why couldn't the bowling club attract any good players?

They said 3 strikes you're out.

In honor of the Bowling Green Massacre, wear a green ribbon . . .

. . . or, perhaps more appropriately, some color you made up in your head.

What does a bowling ball and your mom have in common?

You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter, and they'll always come back.

A woman ask her husband if he wants to go bowling or spend a night together at home...

The man said:

"I don't want to spend my time sticking my fingers in stinky holes where everyone putted their fingers in..

Let's go bowling!"

I started to tell a bowling joke to my friend

He stopped me and said: spare me.

Why was the serial killer intentionally bad at bowling?

He preferred to gut her.

Breaking up with your significant other is like bowling

You carry something heavy going into it, and if it goes as planned, you walk away with an X.

I was bowling with a friend and when it was his turn, I called out to him:

"Germany, Italy, Spain, Norway!"


"What?" My friend said.


"Europe."

A bowling ball jumped off the roof of a tall building.

Looking among the pieces of shattered bowling ball, the Physicist in the crowd regretfully said, "He had so much potential..."








I know I know. I'm not a dad but I teach physics and I've never made up a joke before....

I just started a new job in a bowling alley

Yeh, just tenpin'

The bowling alley down the street just had its 300th strike.

They must have terrible working conditions.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

"Grandpa, tell the story again when you broke a duck's neck with your erection at your brother's wedding!"

Well, children, the year was 1922. I had nothing more than a flatcap, a shovel, and my favorite pint glass to my name. It was around the time where cars were a brand new luxury and a lass would let you put a thumb in her bum just to honk the horn. Well as luck would have it, I was out peat poaching ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man goes to get a few things for his wife before their party

On his way back from the store a beautiful blonde woman starts flirting with him out of nowhere. Him and his wife haven't been getting along lately and he finds himself flirting back with her, suddenly hooking up with her and finally finding himself the next morning in her apartment naked,
Desper...

What do you get when you cross a bowling ball with a bird?

A bowled eagle!

What do you call a girl who stands in the middle of a bowling alley?

Elaine

My aunt lost a foot when someone dropped a bowling ball on her

Does she walk with a limp?

No, she's just a bit shorter.

What's the difference between a truck load of babies and a truck load of bowling balls?

There's only one you can unload with a pitchfork.

So I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley

She said "Tenpin?" I said, "No, it's a permanent job."

- Tim Vine, King of the one liners.

My girlfriend bought me a bowling ball the other day.

She thought i wouldn't like it but, It was right up my alley!

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A trucker was hauling a load of bowling balls across the South.

As he’s cruising down the highway in Alabama, he passes two black boys traveling down the road on a bike. He ignores them and continues down the road a bit before stopping at a diner to eat some delicious chicken-fried steak. After he’s finished eating, it begins to rain, and he continues back out o...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Bowling Ball Delivery

A semi truck driver is hired to deliver a load of bowling balls from Houston to Atlanta. He gets a bonus if he gets it there in under twenty four hours. He's speeding down the highway when he sees two black men walking with a bike. They flag him down and he pulls over. They ask him for a ride since ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Dad's Balls

After a successful strike dad would always love throwing the ball to the kids in the crowd.


After the 3rd time, he wasn't allowed in the bowling alley anymore.

You guys hear about the guy that went bowling in NY after he came back from West Africa?

They say ebola perfect game.

The Galactic Empire, after the destruction of the Death Star, has taken to bowling during the interim.

The Empire Strikes Back, they call it.

What do you call an African who plays 10 pin bowling online?

Ebola.

Why don't Asians like bowling

Because it's bowring

I'm sorry

A group of church ministers start a bowling team. What do they call themselves?

I was walking across the street at work today and an old man grabbed my arm, somewhat suddenly. I immediately thought he needed helped crossing the street, but he appeared to be moving fine, regardless of his cane. We kept walking as he held tightly to my arm. He started speaking, "a group of church...

A priest told me this joke as a kid.

There were 3 men, they were best friends, and they were quite unhealthy. Their names were, Bert, Chester, and Earl.

They were actually really unhealthy and Bert decided that he needed to take charge of him and his friends' health. He decided that they were going to be on a diet together to he...

After many faithful years as a Christian, John's dedication finally paid off as he found himself the girl of his dreams.

At the wedding he walks over to his best friend for advice.
"Hey man! What is it that I'm supposed to do when I get her all alone after the wedding?"
"Ah, that's simple. You just take your most prized-possession and stick it in where she pees."
"Ah! Thanks dude!"
"No problem!" ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

My team decided to establish a tradition

Everyone on the team would sit in a circle surrounding the team captain before the start of the season. He would then headbutt the ball at one of us, and they would have to headbutt it back at him. The captain would then headbutt it at the person sitting next to them. This would repeat as it cycled ...

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