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Two bowling teams, one made up of all blondes and one of all brunettes,

charter a double-decker bus for a weekend tournament in Atlantic City.

The brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus, and the blonde team rides on the top level.

The brunette team down below is whooping it up and having a great time when one of them realizes she doesn't hear anyth...

An American man, a French man, a Spanish man and a German man are standing on the sidewalk, trying to watch a street performer juggle bowling pins.

The juggler notices they're having a bit of trouble, so he stands on a large wooden box and says to them, "Can you see me now?"

They answer one at a time:

"Yes."

"Oui."

"Sí."

"Ja."

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Once there was a women's bowling team. Everyone on the bowling team was so-so at bowling, with the exception of two women.

One of the two women was named Martha. Martha was absolutely abysmal at bowling. Every single game, she got at least nine gutter balls.

The other woman was Linda, and she was the best player who had ever set foot in the bowling alley. Every time the team won a bowling match, Linda was respons...

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Lance Armstrong went bowling with a friend

Lance Armstrong went bowling with a friend one night. His buddy got a strike in the first frame. Not to be outdone, Lance got up and did the same.

His buddy said, "Nice roll, that's what I call a full count!"

Lance responded, "What do you mean? That's baseball, you idiot."

"I ...

A couple is reading in their living room after dinner, and the husband announces that he had a rough day at work and is going to skip going to his bowling league that night.

The wife nods and goes back to reading her magazine, but keeps glancing at the living room clock. About twenty minutes later the kitchen phone rings, the wife starts to get up to answer it, but the husband tells her he’s closer, so he walks into the kitchen and answers the phone.


“What?...

I got out of my car, exasperated, and phoned my wife. I said, "Unbelievable...I was on my way to the bowling alley with my friends and my tyre went flat."

"Have you got a spare?" she questioned.

"Honey," I sighed, "I'm not at the bowling alley yet."

What’s the difference between your wife and a bowling ball?

I can only get three fingers in a bowling ball

My girlfriend broke up with me since I made too many bowling jokes.

I guess they just weren't up her alley.


God she's such a pinhead.

It was my son's birthday, so I took 4 of his mates for a burger and then bowling.

They had a great time, he would have loved it

Stay Alert - The Bowling-Alley Killer is still at large ...

Police warn he may strike again.

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Dave

Because Dave works hard at the plant and spends most evenings bowling or playing basketball at the gym, his wife thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday she takes him to a local strip club.

The doorman at the club greets them and says, ''Hey, Dave! How ya doing?'' His wif...

So... two guys are walking through the desert and they find this deep hole.

The first guy says "That looks like a deep hole."
The second guy says "That looks like a REALLY deep hole. Let's check it out." He picks up a small rock and throws it in. The rock goes Bang bang ^bang .... They agree. It is deep. They pick up a rock the size of a bowling ball and throw it...

Never go bowling with a mathematician

They always find the X's

I told my friend I had just landed a job in a bowling alley.

"Ten pin?" He asked. "No" I replied, "it's permanent"

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Low wage workers play basketball. Tradesmen go bowling. Middle managers play softball. Upper managers play tennis. CEOs play golf.

The lesson: the higher you climb, the smaller your balls get.

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Trucker is hauling a load of bowling balls to New York

A truck driver is hauling a load of black bowling balls to New York. He sees two chimpanzees riding bicycles on the side of the road so he stops to give them a lift. He doesn’t have room in the cab so he puts them and the bikes in the tractor trailer.

While driving through a rural town he is...

My wife asked me if I wanted to go bowling or if we would stay home tomorrow.

I replied; “I don’t feel like shoving my fingers in some holes where a bunch of weirdos have been inside before me. So let’s go bowling”

What's the difference between a bowling ball and your mom?

Nothing. They are both picked up, fingered,and thrown in the gutter

Last night I did Stand-Up in a Bowling Alley parking lot

Some of my jokes struck out. The audience was split.

A group of three successful bowlers traveled to every bowling alley in their county, talking trash at every alley and winning every game. Finally, the owner of an old ma and pa bowling alley had enough and invited them to a secret underground alley.

The old owner explained the rules to a new type of bowling.


"You place the ball at your feet, and then control the ball with your voice"


"That preposterous" said one of the bowlers.


"No, said the old owner, the acoustics in this room are so finely att...

I'm starting a business that is half bowling alley and half safe injection site.

It's going to be called "Pins & Needles".

Anyone wanna hang out later? Maybe go bowling?

I'm asking for a friend..

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For a good time go bowling

A woman was having sex with her husbands best friend when her phone rang and her husband's name appeared on the ID. As she answered the call, her lover jumped out of bed and began to dress in a hurry. "relax" she said after she hung up the phone. He was just calling to tell me that he'd be home late...

What does the bowling ball who was taken hostage say?

Please spare me

What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?

An Airstrike

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Roger is a hard worker and he spends most of his nights bowling or playing volleyball. One weekend his wife decides that he needs to relax a little and take a break from sports, so she takes him to a strip club.

The doorman at the club spots them and says, “Hey, Roger! How are you tonight?”
His wife, surprised, asks her husband if he has been here before.
“No, no. He’s just one of the guys I bowl with.”


They are seated and the waitress approaches, sees Roger and says, “Nice to see you, R...

Why can’t they make a bowling video game?

Because they couldn’t measure it in frames per second.

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Mr. Johnson joined a bowling team. "We meet at 8:00 every Saturday morning," said the captain. "Okay," said Mr. Johnson, "but I might be five minutes late for the first game."

That Saturday, Mr. Johnson arrived at exactly 8:00 and bowled a turkey with his right hand. When he left the bowling alley, he said, "Next week, I might be five minutes late."

The next Saturday, Mr. Johnson arrived at exactly 8:00 and bowled a six-pack with his left hand. When he left the bow...

That's not a bowling ball, dad.

This weekend me and my dad were out bowling, you see. He gets his shoes on, and picks his ball from the rack. A nice, shiny, pinkish purple ball. He throws it down the lane, and we can't find it. The thing is gone. We look for at least an hour for this ball, but it's vanished. In the car on the way ...

Can you teach me how the scoring works in bowling?

Of course! It’s something right up my alley!

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What's the difference between a truckload of babies and a truckload of bowling balls?

You can't empty a truckload of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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What’s the difference between a prostitute and a bowling ball?

I don’t have a freezer full of bowling balls in my basement.

What does a bowling ball and your mom have in common?

You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter, and they'll always come back.

I went bowling with my daughter.

Next time I'll just use a bowling ball.

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I swear to god I did not go out Bowling

A man tells his wife that he's going out to buy cigarettes. When he gets to the store he finds out it's closed. So the guy ends up going to the bar to use the vending machine. While there, he has a few beers and begins talking to this beautiful girl. He has a few more beer and the next thing he know...

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Whenever I go bowling....

I enter my name as "3 testicles".

That way, occasionally the monitor says "Congratulations 3 testicles! You got a spare!"

A bowling ball jumped off the roof of a tall building.

Looking among the pieces of shattered bowling ball, the Physicist in the crowd regretfully said, "He had so much potential..."








I know I know. I'm not a dad but I teach physics and I've never made up a joke before....

Have you ever heard of the Bowling Ball Killer?

He waits till he sees a group of people standing in a perfect bowling pin formation and then that's when he strikes. Very disturbing.

(not mine, but my partner's joke)

I always like to go bowling on Thanksgiving.

Because I am guaranteed to get a turkey that day.

After hours of waiting for the bowling alley to open...

...we finally got the ball rolling.

Why are players good at bowling?

Because they have the most Xs.

I’m really good at bowling

I always get a hole in one

Your mom is like a bowling ball.

She's round, heavy, gets picked up, fingered in three holes, tossed in the gutter and she still comes back for more.

My car can speed faster than bullets, drive under water and knock down evil like bowling pins.

It's a Porsche to be reckoned with

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I was lucky enough to win a couple of coupons for some cool bowling balls with number jokes printed on them.

I won two, three for five, sick "seven ate nine" ten pin bowling balls.

Or in other words I... 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ...pin bowling balls.

Before Malcolm X ever went bowling, he'd get his friends really drunk...

Then he convinced them all that he got a strike on his first bowl.

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