Why was the programming language afraid when it entered the arena?

It had enumerable foes.

The Golden State Warriors will be playing in an empty arena tonight, due to Coronavirus.

And the Los Angeles Chargers have already announced that, next season, they will continue to play in an empty stadium.

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An old man decides that he wants to see a bullfight before he dies.

Immediately upon arriving in Spain, the man makes his way to the arena, then cheers along with the crowd as he watches the matador fight the bull. For as much fun as it is, he soon realizes that the travel and the excitement have left him feeling worn out, so he decides to find a nearby restaurant b...

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Bull Testicles (this isn't necessarily NSFW but it's not for people who get grossed out easily so you've been warned)

My dad told me this a few years back

A tourist in Spain is in a restaurant near a bullfighting arena right after a bullfight.
There's a table nearby where a guy is eating a dish with two big balls in it and all around the table people are making merry.
The tourist got curious and asked ...

I'm obsessed with bad jokes about arenas said in a German accent.

You'll understand venue experience them.

The Dog Fight

The Israeli Dog vs. The Arab Dog

  
The Israelis and Arabs realized that, if they continued fighting, they would someday end up destroying the whole world. So they decided to settle their dispute with an ancient practice: a duel of two, like David and Goliath. This "duel" would be a dog fi...

What do you call a happy cannibal in an arena?

Glad he ate her

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How do you know if someone is an idiot in a cock fight arena?

He brought a duck to a cock fight.

How do you know if someone is more of an idiot than the first one?

If he placed a bet on the duck.

How do you know if a syndicate is involved?

If the duck won.

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A Spanish man went to a restaurant right next to a bull fighting arena.

He always ordered the same thing after a bull fight, 2 bull testicles cooked to perfection.
The man did this every week for months and was always satisfied with the taste and the size of the bull testicles until one week he was disappointed with the size of the testicles.
Confused, he decide...

Why is it so windy inside a sports arena?

All those fans

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The wrestling match was about to begin...

...and the Contender's coach was once again lecturing the Contender.

"If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times-don't let the Champion get you in The Pretzel! No one has ever been able to get out of The Pretzel!"

The Contender nodded his head, getting ready for the match. ...

How do wrestlers enter the arena?

Through the Luchadoor.

corona joke

I was at a hockey game last night, ppl arnt that worried i guess.

Only two ppl in the arena had masks.

(my first post here - only anwsered before a few times hope i made it right)

He was such a brutal fighter that, after slaying the tigress in the arena, he proceeded to devour her flesh. And he felt no remorse.

He was Gladiator.

My college graduation was held inside the basketball arena and man was it hot

Musta been like 5,000 degrees in there

Why did the arena get hot after the game?

All of the fans left

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It was Friday night. Frank, Jim and Ed were at the game ready to watch 26 infected zombie girls tear each other to pieces.

Tied around the inside of the arena, the infected girls are labelled A-Z, with fresh meat tied to their backs to entice them to fight. The winner is the last one standing.

Over 50,000 spectators watch from the stands behind a wire fence, betting slips in hand and eager for the fight to begin....

A man goes to Spain

He arrives, and of course, the first thing he has to go see is the daily bull fight.
The match is drawn out, a banderillero is gored, but eventually the bull is subdued and the matador emerges victorious.
The man is famished at this point, and so, entranced by the fight, he finds his way to t...

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Three warriors and a female troll enter the Colosseum.

The first, wielding a sword, attacked the massive lady-beast head on but was quickly dispatched. The 2nd, wielding a flail was picked up and thrown across the arena like a toy. The 3rd warrior knew he could not defeat the troll by conventional means and with that, he charged at the troll as fast as ...

A guy goes ice fishing

He finds a suitable spot and starts to auger a hole. Just then he hears a booming voice from above:

“There’s no fish there!”

Guy freaks out, grabs his stuff in a hurry, finds another spot, starts a-drillin’.

“There’s no fish there!”

Really getting spooked, hightails it ...

After completing filming of License to Kill, Timothy Dalton was dismayed when producers told him they wanted him to retire from the James Bond franchise.

He pleaded with producers to give him just one more film but they already had his replacement lined up, a younger actor they felt was more suitable for the leading role in an action movie. But Dalton wouldn't quit that easily. He convinced the producers that if he could best his would-be replacement...

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A man goes to the circus

A young man named John was a huge fan of the circus all the way through childhood, he had a huge affection for the acrobatics, showmanship and the hilarious clowns.

Finally, one day, a circus came to his tiny village and he saved all his money to make the trip.

He had a great time, the...

Circus in a third world country suburb can be a mess

So the lion tamer was doing his thing when suddenly the lion flips and starts attacking

People freak out, chaos ensues.. the two-week hungry lion runs around the arena. People run for their lives.

A disabled guy gets up on a pole in order to save his life, thinking it might be a good p...

The year is 2135, and the US and Russia are the only 2 remaining nations.

After a century of warfare, the two nations expanded their borders, annexing an country that stood in it's way.

Both nations, hungering for world domination, have been at war with each other for over 20 years, and have decided that the fighting would never end, as the two were so closely matc...

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One day, this guy decides to go ice fishing.

He gets out onto the ice and starts making a hole with his ice augur. Suddenly he hears a booming voice say "there's no fish there!"

He looks around startled but doesn't see anyone. He packs up and moves to another spot and starts working on a new hole. Again he hears the booming voice "there...

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“Las Bolas del Toro”, a joke my grandfather loves to tell me.

A young man visits Spain on a trip, he hears a ruckus and goes to inspect.

He finds an arena where the bull fighting had just ended, and sees a lot of people filing into a restaurant across the street.

The young man sits down and begins looking at the menu, when suddenly he hears the...

Little bit of a read but funny

(Im from Louisiana and we usually use Boudreaux and Thibadeaux as our characters with our cajun accent but for joke purposes ill use tim and matt)
Tim and Matt went to see a wrestling match at a local arena. There was a famous wrestler in town called the Human Pretzel (due to his special move fol...

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A woman is on vacation in Spain...

A lady goes on vacation to Spain and decides to go to a bull fighting match. She finds it mildly entertaining but is somewhat distressed at the violence inherent in the act. After the show ends she goes to a restaurant near the arena and asks the waiter what he would recommend. He passionately recom...

There's no fish

A couple of hillbillies decide to go ice fishing one day. They get their shanty set up and just as they're about to drill they hear.... there's no fish under the ice there. So they decide to move their shanty to a new location, get it all set up, just as they're about to drill they hear... there's n...

You know it's cold in Minnesota when....

Everyone goes to ice arena to warm up.

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Here is one of my favourite Iranian jokes that I've translated to English for you all, hope you like it

One day there was a king who had the the most beautiful daughter anyone had ever seen.

Everyone wanted to sleep with his daughter so he thought he would make a game of this.

King: "Anyone who can wrestle my lion and kill it will be given permission fuck my daughter"

For days m...

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[Long] So a guy goes to Spain to watch a bullfight.

After the bullfight he goes to a restaurant across the street and notice one guy eating a plate with two large balls of meat on it.

"What's that?" He asks the waiter.

"Those are the testicles of the bull that died in the arena today. Eating them is said to give you the virility and vit...

The Russian Pretzel. Slight NSFW

It is the day of the World Championship in Freestyle wrestling. Just before the Gold medal match, a coach is giving one last pep talk before his man goes on the match.
"O.k. This Russian is known as the best of all time. He has gone undefeated for 7 years now and it is all because of his famous P...

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I was at a U2 concert the other night...

After one of the song's ended, there was complete silence in the arena.



*clap*



*clap*



*clap*



Bono was standing above everyone clapping every few seconds. After about a minute of this he went up to the mic and said, "Every time I clap my han...

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A duck goes into a bar, approaches the counter, and orders a sandwich

He says to the bartender 'listen, I'm a bricklayer on the construction site nearby, the works will last for some time and I'll be coming here every day around lunchtime for a sandwich , so think about some discount or something?

The bartender, shocked as he has never encountered a talking duc...

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Man travels to Spain

A man travels to Spain and decides to watch one of the bullfighting matches for which Spain is well known.

The match was intense & thrilling. Unlike anything which can be found anywhere else in the world. Afterwards there was a celebration for the Torero (Bullfighter) and the crowd slowl...

['90s] Did you hear McDonalds just bought the naming rights to that new hockey stadium?

They're calling it the Mac-Arena.

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A Frenchman, a Russian, and a Mexican all arrive in hell...

...when the Devil appears before them. He says that to get out of hell, they must each complete three tasks: have sex with a woman 100 times, kill a bear, and drink 100 shots of tequila.

The Frenchman, being French, decides he'll start with making love to the woman 100 times. He starts out we...

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The Bull Fights

A Man won an all paid trip to Spain, luckily for this man there is nothing more that he has ever wanted than to see the bull fights! Upon landing in Spain the man quickly obtained transportation to get to the nearest bull fighting stadium, he arrived just in time! As he took his seat he could not be...

Gladiator's Monday

A gladiator was having a rough Monday at the arena.
His opponent had sliced off both of his arms.
Nevertheless, he fought on, kicking and biting as furiously as he could. But when his opponent lopped off both of his feet, the gladiator had no choice but to give up.
He was now both unarmed...

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Three men go to Spain after hearing about a great restaurant with an amazing speciality

Upon arriving to said restaurant they sit down and order the special. After waiting half an hour a waiter walks out holding two big juicy balls (quite literally) on a platter. Curious the three men ask him what they are being served.

The waiter answers "You see señor, the bull arena is right ...

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